posted
So, i was staffing a Lutheran youth event and was talkin to some of the other staffers when i heard somebody behind me softly say my name, i turn around and there is this very pretty and tall redheaded chick standing there looking kind of sheepish. i said yes and i asked how she'd been and everything not knowing who on earth she was, then she was like "you don't remember me do you"...i knew that if i'd said no she would have felt bad, been offended and walked away, so i stood there for a moment and thought, and finally came up with...
"you look different with your clothes on."
it worked. she fell into a chair laughing. We dated for years after that.
posted
One guy, in Chicago on business asked me to go back to his hotel room with him. When I declined he persisted, "But I have a suite !" Cuz that makes all the difference!
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posted
The word of the day is "legs". What do you say you and I go back to my place and spread the word?
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"Want to come back to my place and [make love] like wombats?" Her: "How do wombats [make love]? "I have no idea. But I'm willing to keep trying until we get it right."
This pickup line never works properly, though. I mean, sometimes it works in the sense that she just says "Yes" but it's very rare for someone to ask the right follow-up question so you can use the punchline.
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I just heard this one last night. Although it's more of a mid-date line then a pickup line. This method can be substituted in place of the “fake yawn/put arm around shoulders of the girl,” method.
Your by the person and ask them, "If you were a pirate, which shoulder would your parrot be on? This one?" as you touch their shoulder closest to you, "or this one?" as you put you arm across the back of her shoulders and put your hand on the other one. Leave hand there if it was a good reaction.
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"Do you wanna go to my place and make wild passionate monkey love?"
99 times out of 100 this gets you slapped in the face.
but ooooh, that 100th time.
When I was in my late teens I told some associates that was my routine for picking up girls. One guy was so taken with that, "but oooh, that 100th time" that every time he sees me, he repeats it. And its been 20 years.
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posted
That may be why I've been avoiding him for the past year or so.
How about:
Hey, he just hit me. I am going to sue. You are all witnesses. You saw it. I want you all to be witnesses. You, I want your phone number, and yours, and (drops to a sexy voice) especially yours.
Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002
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quote:Originally posted by Dan_raven: "Do you wanna go to my place and make wild passionate monkey love?"
99 times out of 100 this gets you slapped in the face.
but ooooh, that 100th time.
Hey - a guy used that line on me the same night his buddy tried the "drive Alexis" line I mentioned above. Ah, memories. That was a great night, even if no one went home with anyone else.
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posted
Well, when I was in Israel last year, the cab drivers would CONSTANTLY hit on me. My favorite pickup, though, that I received from an Israeli cab driver:
Driver: You're so cute!! Why aren't you my wife? (pause) You're not married, are you?
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posted
If you see a god looking girl at a bar, go stand next to her and wait a few minutes. Make sure she notices you. Once the few minutes are up, simply say "How am I doin' so far?"
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posted
A wise man once told me his finest pickup line while dispensing advice, and it has burned a permanent place into my mind: "There's a bucket of chicken in my pants, wanna get greasy?"
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posted
This only makes sense in a high school/college setting, but whatever. At least, that's the only place I've seen it used.
"Do you want to study algebra at my house? We can add you and me, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply!"
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Pick your target, walk up and pretend to pick something up off the ground. Tell them "I think you dropped something." Hold out your fist like you're going to drop whatever it was you picked up into their hand. When they extend their hand, grab it and hold it.
Worked on my then-future husband after I had demonstrated it to him on someone else!
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posted
I was thinking the same thing jebus. And Jay I started this thread with completely good intentions. Really. But I also can't say I'm too terribly shocked by what the locals have done with it. I mean, isn't it a tradition in cyberspace to derail or debase a thread as quickly as you can?
Posts: 232 | Registered: Jan 2005
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quote:Originally posted by Da_Goat: This only makes sense in a high school/college setting, but whatever. At least, that's the only place I've seen it used.
Speaking of cheesy math pick-up lines...
"Man I wish I was a derivitive 'cause I would love to lie on your curves."
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posted
walk up to someone and lick your finger..then touch your shirt and their shirt and say "What do you say we get out of these wet clothes."
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