posted
Annie, I noticed how upset you were in that thread. I'm dissappinted with myself that I didn't email you like I told myself to.
And I admit, I've been caught in assuming that porter will just toe the mormon family man party line. I like you as a person, Porter, I just very infrequently agree with you.
Anyway, this has been a real eye-opener. I hope you'll accept my apology for sometimes making assumptions that aren't warranted...
Posts: 4816 | Registered: Apr 2003
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posted
Thought I was you or... Oh, I get it. Thought I was AntiCool. That's what I get for being such an alias ho'.
Posts: 2010 | Registered: Apr 2003
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Some of your earlier responses were quite short and sharp. I think that is a posting style you sometimes fall into when you think the people disagreeing with you are being too rude or too stupid (in, of course, your opinion ).
[I can't explain it properly. But some of your posts made me think "Hey, this guy sounds like Porter..."]
Interestingly - I have noticed a change in your posting style in this thread. You seem to be explaining things in more depth and being a bit more - tolerant? perhaps.
Either way, I wouldn't feel bad about it. It added interest. Posts: 4393 | Registered: Aug 2003
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posted
I think she's talking about the "If you don't enjoy OSC's columns, you don't have to read them" thread.
Posts: 1002 | Registered: Feb 2005
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posted
I don't know if I've really managed to be any more "true, kind, and necessary" since I changed usernames. I mean, the whole point of Hatrack is kind of unneccesary. I have been quite pointed at times, but tried not to direct pointedness my conversants.
Posts: 2010 | Registered: Apr 2003
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Duh. I should have figured that out. But, to be honest, I didn't read that thread, because I didn't felt like I fell into either extreme, and I didn't want to witness the sniping that seemed inevitable. :-\
Posts: 13680 | Registered: Mar 2002
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posted
Tom: Oh, sad. Nah, it wasn't the latest thread - she first said it several weeks ago. It's possible she has more Anne Shirley in her soul.
I was delighted with the explanation, in the same way I'm delighted when she assures me that the reason (a generic) he hasn't asked me out yet is because he's intimidated.
[ February 17, 2005, 08:23 PM: Message edited by: Lady Jane ]
Posts: 1163 | Registered: Jan 2005
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quote:And you know what? 95% of the time, I fall right into the stereotypical Mormon mold. This either means that a) I am mostly an unthinking lemming (even though I know that the story of suicidal lemmings is a myth) following first what my parents taught me and later what my culture tells me or b) as a thinking person, I have come to share most of the attitudes and opinions that people generally associate with those of my faith.
I personally like to believe b), but I often wonder if people have assumed a). After all, it is so much easier to do so put me in a neat little cubby-hole.
I hope this post doesn't come off as rude or pigheaded. Please accept my apologies in advance if it does.
I'm wondering what's really wrong with making assumptions about a person if you actually know him. I mean, when I think about it, most of the time I am something of a lemming, but to myself. That is, I've done a lot of thinking about what I believe and why, and now that I've done that thinking, I usually just go along believing what I believe without questioning it until I have a reason to re-examine things. Consequently, someone who knows me well will probably have a good idea how I will react to a situation or idea before I actually react. They can assume that I will behave a certain way. I see that less as sticking me in a cubbyhole than as just knowing who I am.
Now, if someone is making incorrect assumptions about me, that can rankle. But so long as the things that people are assuming about me are true, what's the problem?
Posts: 4534 | Registered: Jan 2003
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posted
I think the problem, saxon is that when we know, or think we know what someone else's opinion on a certain subject is, some of us may be more inclined to form arguments against that supposed opinion rather than give it any consideration.
Posts: 14554 | Registered: Dec 1999
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posted
I don't think I understand what you're saying. I mean, it seems like someone who's not going to give any consideration to someone else's ideas is going to do it even if he doesn't make assumptions. And conversely, someone who is open to new ideas will still be open to ideas even if he does make assumptions.
Posts: 4534 | Registered: Jan 2003
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posted
Saxy, have you ever been in an argument with someone who seems to be in another conversation? I know I've had arguments thrown against a dozen times that refute something I've never said, but that they assume I subscribe to.
Posts: 1163 | Registered: Jan 2005
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quote: Oh yeah, I was wondering why that picture of ElJay is titled "horns", at the end of the address.
Hey, I can answer that! But it's kinda a long, irrelevant explination.
Around Halloween Noemon said something about pottery horns on a leather thong you can tie around your head and cover with your hair. I have a pair, that I got at the renn fest, so I put them on, snapped a pic of myself, and posted it, saying "You mean like this?" He said yep, the thread was pretty much dead, and I forgot about it.
On Halloween itself I wore them to work, and had several people come up and tell me what cute kitten ears I was wearing. I started a rather tongue-in-cheek thread complaining about people mistaking Hellspawn for a kitten, forgetting about the very kittenish looking pic I had posted of myself in the same horns. Sara hadn't forgotten, and posted the link. Then a couple of days after THAT, I got a speeding ticket. I mentioned it here, including that the cop was very nice to me, dropping it three miles so it was in the lowest category and advising me to go talk to the county clerk and ask to have it switched to an administrative ticket, which would have the same fine but not go on my insurance.
Sara posted a cheeky comment wondering why he would be so nice to me, linking the picture again. After the second time she linked to it, I started switching the pic out randomly, so the same link pointed to different, weird pictures of me, instead of the cute one.
The jackhammer one was actually the first I put up, but then there were a few others. I was amusing myself, but she never linked to it again, so I was only amusing myself. I was kinda hoping she'd put in the link without following it, and everyone would wonder why she had linked to that weird picture. But she never did, which spoiled all my fun.
Anyway, when I wanted to link to the jackhammer pic somewhere else, I just slid it back in that spot, and it's been there ever since.
-----
Noemon, thanks for the kind words, and I'm also glad you're back around. Posts: 7954 | Registered: Mar 2004
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quote:Saxy, have you ever been in an argument with someone who seems to be in another conversation? I know I've had arguments thrown against a dozen times that refute something I've never said, but that they assume I subscribe to.
I'm sure that has happened to me, although I can't recall any specific times off the top of my head. But it seems that the problem there isn't so much that an assumption is being made but that 1.) an incorrect assumption is being made (that is, an assumption is being made by a person that doesn't actually know you well enough to make a correct assumption) and 2.) that the person is not listening to what you're saying.
Posts: 4534 | Registered: Jan 2003
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quote:"I have a friend who says that ever since I (involuntarily) switched usernames, I come off as much more polite."
Really? I had observed the exact opposite, from my perspective. I honestly thought that you felt a bit liberated and free to mix it up a bit again.
Actually, Kat, I have to say I haven't really noticed any "before" and "after" difference in your posting style. Posts: 5771 | Registered: Nov 2000
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posted
I noticed a difference in Katie's posting. But I put it down to PMS. And I was right.
WARNING: GUYS, YOU MAY FIND WHAT'S COMING TOO PERSONAL. . . . . . . . . . .
BTW, Katie, it's your fault, you know. I synchronize every time I start thinking about and seeing a friend a lot, and it's your fault. I had a grand total of 1 period since the baby was born, and then this month...
Oh my stars. I don't get it every month, but every four months or so there's a carnival of hormones and I get horrible PMS and horrible cramps. It's calmer and less frequent now than it was when I was a teenager, but it still happens. Worst of all, I don't really know what's going on until I'm halfway through or it's over. My mother used to pat me on the head and tell me it just means I'm fertile.
So, ugh, sorry. I hope my friends can forgive me.
Posts: 1163 | Registered: Jan 2005
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posted
Perhaps because many of us have been through it ourselves, and if we haven't, we know someone who has?
Guys, avert your eyes again. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . I hope you don't get it every time you wear the dress, though. I am firmly convinced now that the time I have spent on it is what caused this, and there is a mystical connection between the dress, you, and me that had to be sealed in blood or something.
For the record...ELJay (and punwit), that jackhammer pic isn't really my wallpaper, I said that because it was funny at the time. My wallpaper is as it has been for a year..pictures of my wonderful niece, who is about to turn 2 years old on March 13th.
I sort of picked up a vibe from ELJay that she was a little sensitive about the subject. Not real sensitive, because if she was then I wouldn't tease her about it, but it got a little bit of a rise out of her. I never meant to go to far with it, and I actually talked to her about it once, just so that she knew I was kidding around (she did... ).
I started posting in response to ELJay because of her connection to dkw and Bob, and wanted her to feel welcome here at Hatrack. Bob and Dana made sure everyone knew who she was, and once I saw a few posts from her and realized she seemed cool I made an effort to make sure she felt welcome.
At least I hope I did.
I really liked Bob when I met him in Boston, and Dana seemed cool, both here at Hatrack and on the phone when we all talked to her from Boston, so I thought her sister would probably be pretty cool too.
Also, I got the impression that she wasn't shy, so I could tease her a bit, and when I did she joked right back.
Anti-cool, when you post as MPH I look forward to your responses, most of the time, I don't always agree with you, and you do seem to toe a fairly conservative line most of the time, but you usually don't mind explaining how you came to those conclusions as long as the person asking really cares and isn't trying to set you up[ for a fall.
You and Bev should feel very welcome here, more so than most. I thought that Hatrack responds pretty well to you, most of the time, and has from the beginning. I am not trying to tell you that you shouldn't feel something, or tell you what you should feel, not really, just expressing (from an outside view) how I see people responding to you two being here.
I remember being in high school and not even buying a school yearbook because I didn't think anyone would want to sign it. I was wrong....I had people who I didn't even think knew who I was coming over and sharing stories from years ago that I had forgotten. I had popular people come up to me and say that they had always admired me because I had friends from all different social groups, and they wish they had been more like me.
We ALL have the same hangups, just about different things, and some people move on from there while others never do....and THAT is the difference, really. Not in our experiences, but in what we allow them to do to us, and what we learn from them.
Even Prom Queens are worried about popularity sometimes....in some ways more than other people, because so much of who they are is caught up in it.
quote:Anti-cool, when you post as MPH I look forward to your responses, most of the time, I don;t always agree with you, and you do seem to toe a fairly conservitive line most of the time, but you usually don't mind explaining how you came to those conclusions as long as the person asking really cares and isn't trying to set you up for a fall.
Aww, shucks.
If I were to articulate how I hoped that people respond to me online, your description would be pretty close to my ideal.
posted
If I didn't already have too many names, I would have registered "Anti-coolant" which I know doesn't make a lot of sense. See, inhibitions are good for something.
Posts: 2010 | Registered: Apr 2003
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Thanks Annie, thanks Bev!
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