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» Hatrack River Forum » Active Forums » Books, Films, Food and Culture » The Monkey's Paw... REVIVED!!!! (Page 2)

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Author Topic: The Monkey's Paw... REVIVED!!!!
Megan
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Granted! The personal assistant is everything you dreamed and more...and you find this out when s/he develops an obsession with you, kidnaps you, and takes you to a remote cabin, when s/he forces you to produce new and exciting paperwork for him/her to complete.

I wish someone was giving me a massage at this moment.

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Altáriël of Dorthonion
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GRANTED!!! You do get a massage by a really handsome tall guy, but later found out it was a transexual and he was getting too intimate with you....

Umm...I'm still waiting for my wish...

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SteveRogers
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Granted! You can eat absolutely nothing and not die. But instead you can only breathe nitrogen thus you suffocate and die.

I wish had a pet monkey, that didn't have rabies or any other disease or problems and it obeyed my every whim.

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starlooker
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Sidenote:
quote:
you spend the entire rest of your life stuck in a midget sized office at some college campus advicing students on financial aid.

I do that anyways. I'd just as soon know what I'm talking about [Smile]

Anyhoo, back on track:

Granted! Unfortunately, it gets eaten by wild monkey-eating dogs who won't go away even after they've eaten the monkey, and you thus become outcast from society due to being surrounded by wild monkey-eating dogs.

I wish for Spring to never end.

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Altáriël of Dorthonion
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GRANTED!!! Now you are permenantly frozen in time. Spring forever baby!

I wish I had complete control over the Earth.

NOTE: Oh! I didn't mean to hurt anyone's feelings or pride, besides, I meant being inside a very small office, a crappy compy and just being there forever, as in FOREVER AND EVER. I don't think anyone would want to live that way...

[ April 13, 2005, 01:35 PM: Message edited by: Altáriël of Dorthonion ]

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HesterGray
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Granted! Complete control of the Earth is yours! You do not, however, have control over any of the other planets. Jupiter and Saturn team up to launch an attack on you. The Earth is no match at all.

I wish I had a lovely garden with lilacs and tomatoes and strawberries.

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SteveRogers
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Granted! But your garden is infected by toxic waste and takes over the known universe. First they eat you like you planned to do to them.

I wish that none of my wishes could be turned against me. They would be exactly what I wished for and that alone. (Beat that! [Razz] )

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Mr.Gumby
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Granted! but you only had one wish

I wish I could find a job that I didn't hate and could also go to school while having the job.

[ April 13, 2005, 05:12 PM: Message edited by: Mr.Gumby ]

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Vadon
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Granted, you are now a school janitor who works in the bathrooms. Your love for the job come's from the hard work you put out so that children can trash it again.

I wish I could get my hands on a complete mint condition signed copy of First Meetings. ^_^ (The one I read didn't have the fourth story... grumble.)

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starlooker
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NOTE: I was SO not offended. I actually found it pretty funny that your description was so accurate -- and I promise, I don't intend to do it forever and ever! [Smile]

Granted! Unfortunately, the copy you get your hands on turns out to be stolen, and you are put in prison for it when it is returned to its rightful owner.

I wish that no one would ever hurt anyone else ever again.

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Desdemona
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GRANTED! Everybody hurts themselves and dies from the wounds inflicted.

I wish that my cough would go away.

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ProverbialSunrise
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GRANTED: And With the cough goes your lungs.

I wish I could jump 8 feet high in the air.

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HesterGray
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Granted! Except now the earth's ozone layer is completely obliterated forcing us to all live underground, where the ceilings are only 7 feet high.

I wish I had socks with no holes in them.

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Megan
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Granted! Only, now how are you going to get them on your feet?

I wish my house were clean.

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Altáriël of Dorthonion
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GRANTED!! You clean up your house and it's now sparling. Suddenly, a dirty mean cat comes in trough the window and sullies your floor with mud.

I wish I had all the super powers I wanted.
(Orbing like Paige from Charmed, eternal youth and life, three wings, and the best body and looks possible)

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Beanny
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GRANTED!

Only now, your family treats you like a freak and you are banned from society.

I wish for a happy life.

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Altáriël of Dorthonion
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GRANTED!! Except for the fact that everyone feels miserable around you.

I wish I had all the things I wished for on my last wish, but everyone accepted me.

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MEC
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granted, but they only except you because everyone got that stuff.

I wish for whatever you feel like granting.

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Altáriël of Dorthonion
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GRANTED!! You are now a frog.

I wish I was famous in a non-notorious way.

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Megan
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Granted! And now you have a stalker. You really wanted all those pics taken through your blinds of you undressing posted online at www.altáriëlroxors.com, didn't you?

I wish I felt better.

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SteveRogers
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Granted! But know you feel so good about yourself you make horrible mistakes and lose all of your money gamling.

I wish that I had super powers.

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Marek
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Granted! you have the power of teleportation, but cannot control the destination, also you have a superhuman sense of smell, trust me, it will suck.

I wish I were a better student, and could earn a PhD

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Stone_Wolf_
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Granted, but now your name is Bob and you are 72 and live in Maine.

I wish my neck didn't hurt.

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Marek
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Granted! by a guillotine

I wish I knew how to write HTML (it would help with a job I want)


weird coincidence I did used to go by Bobby and am 27, so that was sort of close

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Itsame
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Granted, but you can't type it.

I wish were better at tennis.

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Stone_Wolf_
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Granted, you are now 1/1,000,000th of a degree better at tennis.

I wish my bank account had a billion dollars in it.

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AchillesHeel
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Granted, but you hid it in various foreign banks under fake names to hide all your money from the government, and you can't remember any details that would allow you access.

I wish I had a job that didn't have a mortality rate.

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Samprimary
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Granted! You are now a mass of infinitely-supported tumorous tissue, a kind of living Henrietta Lacks, hooked eternally into a hamster wheel and harvested weekly for biomass even as you beg your handlers to let you die.

I wish this wish was not subject to the monkey's paw and was actually somehow just beneficial.

Wait, that's boring.

I wish I had two more nights in this hotel.

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Marek
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Granted! You are hired to manage the hotel, making twice what you make now, and with great benefits and thus get to move into the hotel, however you only stay two more nights before the hotel burns down, and now you have no job at all.

I wish I my computer was so cool it was like one Tony Stark would have.

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AchillesHeel
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Granted! your computer is now just like the one that putters around his home lab messing things up.

I wish I had full comprehension of what Samp said.

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Stone_Wolf_
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Sorry, it's only magic, and even magic has it's limitations.

I wish I had an adamantium skeleton.

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Samprimary
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quote:
Originally posted by AchillesHeel:
Granted! your computer is now just like the one that putters around his home lab messing things up.

I wish I had full comprehension of what Samp said.

Granted! Ỹ͇͙̲͛o̵̻̺̱͛̔͗u̟̻̤͖͂͛ͯ̀ ̨͎̯ͬĥ̩͕̰̤̳̙ͭ̀͋̆ͬͫả̶͖̬ͮ̓̓ͨ̾̋v͍̠T 1;̠͂ͮ͋̂e̞̜̟͚̟̠̾̓ͬ̊͊ ̗̩̠̗̤͓ͤ́ͮ̋͑̓m̳̞̺ͫa̤̩̥̘ͫͪ͑̌̋́ͅn͂̽ 68;͞ͅa̝͈̎̒͒g̺̠̗͓̜̝e̦̒̃d̳͔̏ ̬̞͕̝͔̥͂͛͆͞t͚̖̦͈̬͎̺͐̈̽̎ͯ̚o͎͙͓͇̩͕T 3;̄͒͂̋ͭ ͇̀͋͆̒̊̉̄f͉̺̟̟͖̤̜ụ̘͔̫̩̋͐͒͆̿ͦ̉ḻ̤ 92;l̩͙̆̅̓̓̎ͪ̔ŷ̘̙̭̤͖̟̑͑ ̶̙̟̯͇̩̰̑̓͌̂̍ͪ̂c̼͍͔̖̞̺̝̟̼̲̉̋ͯ͆ͅW 4;m̛̘̖͙̣̏̋̌ͅp̵͂͛̐̎͛̓̽r̖ͥ̂͢ͅe̘̣̣͇̺̫̱ ͐̓h͖̙͉̺̖̹̟̿ͣ͆ė͐̓̌̌n̘̉̉ͫ̈̒̕d͖̻̻̫̮ 92;̄̀͘w̝͙̻͔̲ͬ͒̂ͤ͡͠͞h̊͑̿҉҉̩̭͎͍̼͚̻͡aR 0;̤̲͈̬͉͓̪̔̊ͯ̊̆̐̎͟͞ť̫̹̬̬̭̬ͪ̈́͛ͥ́W 4;͗̕ ̧̦̗̼̻̤̖͂͊̒̇̎̆̓̋ͦ̀S̷̰̤ͩ͂ͮ́ͅą͍̻͍͚ ;ͩ̃̈͊̓͢m̵̧͓̜͕̞͙ͦ̃͑͟ ̺͇͖̺͐̏̽̀̕h̶̬͓̘̰͚̘̤ͮͣ͢ͅą͖͈̺̻̗̗̠̋ ;̈́ͨ͑ͭ̏̎ͩ͠s̞̪̩̫͋̊̅͞ ̭͍͓͕̣̮͌ͬͫ͊ͪ͋̑ͩ͝͞s̴̵̳̦̞̭ͦ̿̏̕a̷͕͚R 8;̵̗̟͔̱̭̲̦̥̮ͣ̉̂ͫ͌̄̑͜͠d̘͎̠͉ͣ̅ͫ̏̊̃&# 867;͂͡,̧͚͙̠͗̊͊̀́ ͓̦̘̙̠͙̝̘̆ͫb̢̛̳̝͖̍̓̌ͧ͋́̎̌ͨṵ̸̡̦͔Q 7;̹̰̯ͥ͌̓͠ͅt̵̪͚̍ͥͯ͒̌̚ ̷͎̳̮͇͚͍̦ͧ́u̹͚̬̪̟̹̝͕̩͒͑ͯ̓̃̓nͯ̅̀̾W 9;͏̡̡͈͙̰͚̱d̷̡̖̝̯͈̭̝͙̗͂͛ͬ͌̽̀ͪ͢ȩ̶͕ 04;̩̫͈̖͖͒ͪ̂̅ͩͭͭr̖̳̎̀ͤ̾s̨͍͎̳͉̤̊͆̏͒̊& #768;t̛̛̪̱̤̤̘̱̹͌͊ͪ́̏͑̐̕͝n̷̟̩̜̞̬ͭ̈́ͫN 4;ͭͭͣd̴̸̯̦̀̄ͧ͊̉͒ͦ̚i̗̰̞̰̦̤̼̔ͭͮn̶̮͍̟& #852;̼ͣ̎ͤ̄̿̅̍͠ͅĝ̙̟͈̖̖̝̞̝̘ ̟̼̗̪̈ͮͯH̛͔̠͓̥̦̭͈̞̱̣̫̲ͫ͊͂ͦ͒ͤ̈̆̕W 7;̒͟s͙͕͌͒̎̈ͫ̎̉ ̖̞̝̓̄̉̂̽w̥̜̙̭̭̜͍͌̎͂ͩ́ͮ͘͢͟͡ͅͅŗ̮Q 4;ͧ̾̄̋͋ͭ̄̎dͣͪ͌̾͌͏̶̬͖̼͉̦̤͚ͅs̵̡͔̝͚͕&# 853;͑́̓͆̐͝ͅC̊̄ͥ̔͂͐̀̔ͥ͊̇̌ͥ̚̚҉͖̪̺̭̩̥ ͖̫̺̰̙͘͢͞O̅͆ͭ̑͛͆̍҉͎̼̼̼̲͢M̝̱̙̯̭̮ͬ 49;̓̋͐̒ͧ̈́̽͑͢͜͢͝Ȇ̤͍̪̝̖̺̳̣̦͉̱͇̹͍̻ 57;̂͊̃͐̍̍̒ͤ͛̾̂̂͜͡S̒̽ͨͯ̎ͯ̀ͦ̀͡҉̘͖͙͚& #791;̘̼̞͇̙̪͙̮̘̬ ̃̓̇̉̅͐͌̐̄͂ͮͬ̐̋̚͏͕̳̜͎̞ͩͨ̐͗̋͋͠͝͡ ;̿̃̇͆ͫͥ̑ͧͪͥͨ́͏̶̧̝̻̤̭̯T̵̢̡͌̃͋̈̍ͬV 3;͏͚̜̭͈ ̵̛̥̳͉̣̻̠̺͚̠͍̖̼̭̝̩̥̘̠͆̈́̇̽ͪ͒̃͆́ ͘͘G̸̢̦̘̤̪̠̙͓͇̺̬̦̺̣͉̳ͯͤ̾̍ͨ̽̒͗͊̿ͥ ;͂ͅͅȐ͍̭͚̦̘̎ͫͥͮͬͮͫ̏͂̌ͯ́̀E͆̄͒̐ͭͪ́U 0;̋̂̒̍̑ͨ̚̚͘҉̛̮̮̻͉̠͙̮̜̹̥͠Ȃ̷̷̧̫̪̦ 41;̭̼̮̙̙͙̳̥̳̄ͪ̄ͭ̾͂ͬͪͪ̄̏̎̾͟͞T̨̢͙̲̪&# 845;̣̼̥̭̣ͯͧ̉̿̀̈́̐̑͊͗ͮ́ ̌̂̏̊̎̒ͫͨ̽ͯ̑ͩ̔̃̌͏̯̹̪͎͘͢A̛̠̪̺͔̭̗͇ ;̞̰͉ͬ̓̿ͧ̄͛ͭ͒̑̿͑̾̌͐ͪͤ͗ͤ́̚N̨͌ͥͩ̉̈L 9;ͨ̋͗͛́̐̈ͥ̕͏̛͍͕̥̥̥̞͚̪̟̲D̼̬̻̖̜̭̘̙ 06;ͭ͌ͣ̔ͯ̋̆ͤ̆̾ͥ̇̀͡ ̡̆̃͊͞͏̸̳̜͉̮T̓͌̈ͥ̀̏ͪ̿̀̍̍̄ͭ̉ͥͬ͏̺̳ ;̦̤̬̟̭͓̭̺̺͎̩͠E̵̡̛̠̦͖̻͎̰̙̹̼ͦͦͬ̌̌N 5;̈̈́ͥ͞ͅͅR̿͌̒ͨ̊͑̀̑̏̒̔ͦ͗ͩ͏͚̝̦͓̜̰̕ 60;͝͝R̢̠͕̼̥͓̳̒̏̋̍͛̆ͤͥ̿̓̑̊̀ͣͨͯ̀̚Į̡&# 810;͙̖̠̘͖ͭͭͩ́͠B̢̡̳̞̖̱̼̗͚̼̘̱̥̭̘̙̤̙ͦ& #773;̾ͦ̉ͥ̃́ͭ͑̌͞ͅͅL̷̶̤̰̫̱͕̭͚̺̯͔̑͌ͤ̿͑ ͋ͨ̓̏̔ͪ̈ͅȨ̵̲̪͎̗̣͍͉͙̳̮̣̯̝̫ͬ̉̐̿ͧ͊ ͂ͥ̇͊͆̈́́̚ ̷̫̲͚̭̊͗̉͂̏́͟͞P̤͕̯͕̳͈̬̜̹̝̮̼̝̍͆̓̓ ;̷̜͖̺̹̱̜̞͈̥̳̭̓̆̇ͥ͗̎̄ͦ̅̆̂̆ͦ̈̚͜ͅU 5;̑ͭͮ̅̓̕͡R̸͔͉̲̜̙͚̱̓ͦͮͨ̊̊ͯ̑̊͛̽̉̽ͩ 50;̑͆ͯ̀͡I̴̥̖̥͖̭̠̘̙̻̪͓ͬ̾̀̃͘͟Ļ̷̹̼̘̤&# 825;̊ͥ̉̓̐̀̚̕ͅ
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T_Smith
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quote:
Originally posted by Stone_Wolf_:
Sorry, it's only magic, and even magic has it's limitations.

I wish I had an adamantium skeleton.

Granted. Hello adamantium skeleton! Goodbye bone marrow!


I wish I knew what to wish for in my next post.

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Marek
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quote:
Originally posted by Samprimary:
quote:
Originally posted by AchillesHeel:
Granted! your computer is now just like the one that putters around his home lab messing things up.

I wish I had full comprehension of what Samp said.

Granted! Ỹ͇͙̲͛o̵̻̺̱͛̔͗u̟̻̤͖͂͛ͯ̀ ̨͎̯ͬĥ̩͕̰̤̳̙ͭ̀͋̆ͬͫả̶͖̬ͮ̓̓ͨ̾̋v͍̠T 1;̠͂ͮ͋̂e̞̜̟͚̟̠̾̓ͬ̊͊ ̗̩̠̗̤͓ͤ́ͮ̋͑̓m̳̞̺ͫa̤̩̥̘ͫͪ͑̌̋́ͅn͂̽ 68;͞ͅa̝͈̎̒͒g̺̠̗͓̜̝e̦̒̃d̳͔̏ ̬̞͕̝͔̥͂͛͆͞t͚̖̦͈̬͎̺͐̈̽̎ͯ̚o͎͙͓͇̩͕T 3;̄͒͂̋ͭ ͇̀͋͆̒̊̉̄f͉̺̟̟͖̤̜ụ̘͔̫̩̋͐͒͆̿ͦ̉ḻ̤ 92;l̩͙̆̅̓̓̎ͪ̔ŷ̘̙̭̤͖̟̑͑ ̶̙̟̯͇̩̰̑̓͌̂̍ͪ̂c̼͍͔̖̞̺̝̟̼̲̉̋ͯ͆ͅW 4;m̛̘̖͙̣̏̋̌ͅp̵͂͛̐̎͛̓̽r̖ͥ̂͢ͅe̘̣̣͇̺̫̱ ͐̓h͖̙͉̺̖̹̟̿ͣ͆ė͐̓̌̌n̘̉̉ͫ̈̒̕d͖̻̻̫̮ 92;̄̀͘w̝͙̻͔̲ͬ͒̂ͤ͡͠͞h̊͑̿҉҉̩̭͎͍̼͚̻͡aR 0;̤̲͈̬͉͓̪̔̊ͯ̊̆̐̎͟͞ť̫̹̬̬̭̬ͪ̈́͛ͥ́W 4;͗̕ ̧̦̗̼̻̤̖͂͊̒̇̎̆̓̋ͦ̀S̷̰̤ͩ͂ͮ́ͅą͍̻͍͚ ;ͩ̃̈͊̓͢m̵̧͓̜͕̞͙ͦ̃͑͟ ̺͇͖̺͐̏̽̀̕h̶̬͓̘̰͚̘̤ͮͣ͢ͅą͖͈̺̻̗̗̠̋ ;̈́ͨ͑ͭ̏̎ͩ͠s̞̪̩̫͋̊̅͞ ̭͍͓͕̣̮͌ͬͫ͊ͪ͋̑ͩ͝͞s̴̵̳̦̞̭ͦ̿̏̕a̷͕͚R 8;̵̗̟͔̱̭̲̦̥̮ͣ̉̂ͫ͌̄̑͜͠d̘͎̠͉ͣ̅ͫ̏̊̃&# 867;͂͡,̧͚͙̠͗̊͊̀́ ͓̦̘̙̠͙̝̘̆ͫb̢̛̳̝͖̍̓̌ͧ͋́̎̌ͨṵ̸̡̦͔Q 7;̹̰̯ͥ͌̓͠ͅt̵̪͚̍ͥͯ͒̌̚ ̷͎̳̮͇͚͍̦ͧ́u̹͚̬̪̟̹̝͕̩͒͑ͯ̓̃̓nͯ̅̀̾W 9;͏̡̡͈͙̰͚̱d̷̡̖̝̯͈̭̝͙̗͂͛ͬ͌̽̀ͪ͢ȩ̶͕ 04;̩̫͈̖͖͒ͪ̂̅ͩͭͭr̖̳̎̀ͤ̾s̨͍͎̳͉̤̊͆̏͒̊& #768;t̛̛̪̱̤̤̘̱̹͌͊ͪ́̏͑̐̕͝n̷̟̩̜̞̬ͭ̈́ͫN 4;ͭͭͣd̴̸̯̦̀̄ͧ͊̉͒ͦ̚i̗̰̞̰̦̤̼̔ͭͮn̶̮͍̟& #852;̼ͣ̎ͤ̄̿̅̍͠ͅĝ̙̟͈̖̖̝̞̝̘ ̟̼̗̪̈ͮͯH̛͔̠͓̥̦̭͈̞̱̣̫̲ͫ͊͂ͦ͒ͤ̈̆̕W 7;̒͟s͙͕͌͒̎̈ͫ̎̉ ̖̞̝̓̄̉̂̽w̥̜̙̭̭̜͍͌̎͂ͩ́ͮ͘͢͟͡ͅͅŗ̮Q 4;ͧ̾̄̋͋ͭ̄̎dͣͪ͌̾͌͏̶̬͖̼͉̦̤͚ͅs̵̡͔̝͚͕&# 853;͑́̓͆̐͝ͅC̊̄ͥ̔͂͐̀̔ͥ͊̇̌ͥ̚̚҉͖̪̺̭̩̥ ͖̫̺̰̙͘͢͞O̅͆ͭ̑͛͆̍҉͎̼̼̼̲͢M̝̱̙̯̭̮ͬ 49;̓̋͐̒ͧ̈́̽͑͢͜͢͝Ȇ̤͍̪̝̖̺̳̣̦͉̱͇̹͍̻ 57;̂͊̃͐̍̍̒ͤ͛̾̂̂͜͡S̒̽ͨͯ̎ͯ̀ͦ̀͡҉̘͖͙͚& #791;̘̼̞͇̙̪͙̮̘̬ ̃̓̇̉̅͐͌̐̄͂ͮͬ̐̋̚͏͕̳̜͎̞ͩͨ̐͗̋͋͠͝͡ ;̿̃̇͆ͫͥ̑ͧͪͥͨ́͏̶̧̝̻̤̭̯T̵̢̡͌̃͋̈̍ͬV 3;͏͚̜̭͈ ̵̛̥̳͉̣̻̠̺͚̠͍̖̼̭̝̩̥̘̠͆̈́̇̽ͪ͒̃͆́ ͘͘G̸̢̦̘̤̪̠̙͓͇̺̬̦̺̣͉̳ͯͤ̾̍ͨ̽̒͗͊̿ͥ ;͂ͅͅȐ͍̭͚̦̘̎ͫͥͮͬͮͫ̏͂̌ͯ́̀E͆̄͒̐ͭͪ́U 0;̋̂̒̍̑ͨ̚̚͘҉̛̮̮̻͉̠͙̮̜̹̥͠Ȃ̷̷̧̫̪̦ 41;̭̼̮̙̙͙̳̥̳̄ͪ̄ͭ̾͂ͬͪͪ̄̏̎̾͟͞T̨̢͙̲̪&# 845;̣̼̥̭̣ͯͧ̉̿̀̈́̐̑͊͗ͮ́ ̌̂̏̊̎̒ͫͨ̽ͯ̑ͩ̔̃̌͏̯̹̪͎͘͢A̛̠̪̺͔̭̗͇ ;̞̰͉ͬ̓̿ͧ̄͛ͭ͒̑̿͑̾̌͐ͪͤ͗ͤ́̚N̨͌ͥͩ̉̈L 9;ͨ̋͗͛́̐̈ͥ̕͏̛͍͕̥̥̥̞͚̪̟̲D̼̬̻̖̜̭̘̙ 06;ͭ͌ͣ̔ͯ̋̆ͤ̆̾ͥ̇̀͡ ̡̆̃͊͞͏̸̳̜͉̮T̓͌̈ͥ̀̏ͪ̿̀̍̍̄ͭ̉ͥͬ͏̺̳ ;̦̤̬̟̭͓̭̺̺͎̩͠E̵̡̛̠̦͖̻͎̰̙̹̼ͦͦͬ̌̌N 5;̈̈́ͥ͞ͅͅR̿͌̒ͨ̊͑̀̑̏̒̔ͦ͗ͩ͏͚̝̦͓̜̰̕ 60;͝͝R̢̠͕̼̥͓̳̒̏̋̍͛̆ͤͥ̿̓̑̊̀ͣͨͯ̀̚Į̡&# 810;͙̖̠̘͖ͭͭͩ́͠B̢̡̳̞̖̱̼̗͚̼̘̱̥̭̘̙̤̙ͦ& #773;̾ͦ̉ͥ̃́ͭ͑̌͞ͅͅL̷̶̤̰̫̱͕̭͚̺̯͔̑͌ͤ̿͑ ͋ͨ̓̏̔ͪ̈ͅȨ̵̲̪͎̗̣͍͉͙̳̮̣̯̝̫ͬ̉̐̿ͧ͊ ͂ͥ̇͊͆̈́́̚ ̷̫̲͚̭̊͗̉͂̏́͟͞P̤͕̯͕̳͈̬̜̹̝̮̼̝̍͆̓̓ ;̷̜͖̺̹̱̜̞͈̥̳̭̓̆̇ͥ͗̎̄ͦ̅̆̂̆ͦ̈̚͜ͅU 5;̑ͭͮ̅̓̕͡R̸͔͉̲̜̙͚̱̓ͦͮͨ̊̊ͯ̑̊͛̽̉̽ͩ 50;̑͆ͯ̀͡I̴̥̖̥͖̭̠̘̙̻̪͓ͬ̾̀̃͘͟Ļ̷̹̼̘̤&# 825;̊ͥ̉̓̐̀̚̕ͅ
Seriously! how in the heck....?
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Stone_Wolf_
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quote:
Originally posted by T_Smith:
Granted. Hello adamantium skeleton! Goodbye bone marrow!


I wish I knew what to wish for in my next post.

Granted! Unfortunately it's stupid.

I wish I never got a cold again.

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Itsame
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Granted. You get pneumonia every time you'd otherwise get a simple cold.


I wish to be healthy, wealthy, and wise.

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Stone_Wolf_
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Granted! Your name is now Healthy Wealthy Wise. Unfortunately Mr. H. Wise, your health, net worth and wisdom remain the same.

I wish I knew the answer to any question I chose to ask.

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AchillesHeel
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Granted! the only question you choose to ask is "what is the answer to life the universe and everything?"

I wish we didn't have stupid people like Akin in positions of power.

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Stone_Wolf_
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Granted! The world is now leaderless and falls into chaos and barbarism.

I wish I had a "new ray" that anything I pointed it at and pulled the trigger would be in brand new perfect condition.

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Aris Katsaris
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Granted! Unfortunately the first time you pull the trigger at anything, the whole universe reverts to its brand new state just seconds before the Big Bang. You were pointing it at a part of the universe after all...

I wish for the existence of a happy, pleasant and fulfilling afterlife for all people who die.

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Stone_Wolf_
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Wish granted! You are now a Buddhist.

I wish my hair wasn't getting thinner on top.

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BlackBlade
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Granted! Your hair grows healthy and even all over your scalp, just in time for girls everywhere to decide bald is in, and only natural baldies are attractive. Your SO leaves you for Patrick Stewart.

I wish for this game to stop.

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Stone_Wolf_
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Granted!
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MarekAgain
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I wish this game would restart
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JanitorBlade
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Granted! You reincarnate as yourself, the game of life begins anew. But now you've been born in 2018, you become enslaved by the robot uprising of 2020 along with the rest of humanity. Unfortunately, this time you have no memories of pre-enslavement to sustain you. You die in mental agony.

I wish Mr. Card would come back to the forum.

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TomDavidson
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Granted.

I wish that I could only make beneficial wishes.

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Mr. Y
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Granted. You can now only make wishes that beneficial to your other people. More specifically, to your enemies. Thus in the end, not so beneficial for you.

I wish that I could read faster, yet still remember the story afterward and be able to sympthatise with the characters.

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