and, not to be homophobic, are you generally cool, if you're a male, to get a massage by another male, or if you're a female, a massage by another female?
Posts: 340 | Registered: Jun 2005
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Like professionally? No. I've been given an unprofessional massage though. At a little weekend long competition thing at NASA, we had to stay up all night working on stuff and running to and fro. We were all tired and sore. So a group of us had a long massage chain going on (you massaged the shoulders of the person in front of you). In that instance, I had both a girl and a guy massage my shoulders (since one of them stepped out and the other stepped in). It didn't bother me since none of this was sexual in nature.
Posts: 1960 | Registered: May 2005
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Lurker-Girl gives massages that are teh awesome.
We miss her terribly.
And I think my husband was actually more squicky about undressing for her than I was, although she is of course very professional and respects her clients' modesty assiduously.
Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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We had a circle like that going with a whole high school speech class, the only one that made me uncomfortable at all was the teacher, I'm sure jt stryker would verify that one for you.
Posts: 5362 | Registered: Apr 2004
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I have had two proffesional massages, both of them after long races (a 25K and a Marathon). One was by a female and the other a male, though the gender really didn't matter since the only thoughts going through my head were "OUCH!.... oh that's better... sigh.... OUCH! ....oh that's better.... sigh..."
I would guess that if the massage was for a non-sexual purpose, it wouldn't matter who was giving it. If it was sexual, I would be uncomfortable if the person giving it was someone I was not attracted to.
Posts: 68 | Registered: Sep 2005
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For our honeymoon we had the options of going somewhere really cool and having no money to spend there, or staying at the nicest place we could find locally and enjoying fat cat amenities. We went with the second, which included professional massages.
No problems receiving (or giving) to either gender.
Posts: 7790 | Registered: Aug 2000
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I had weeks of therapeutic massage after getting hit by a car. It was by a woman, but it was one of the most painful experiences of my life and could not have been remotely sexual even if I'd desperately wanted it to be. So no, I would have had no problem receiving one from a man.
Posts: 3243 | Registered: Apr 2002
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I've had a professional massage, although I didn't have to pay for it--the MT volunteered to do it for me. I can't say I really enjoyed it a whole lot. The massage itself was on the painful side, and the massage oil that she used irritated my skin. The after effect of the massage wasn't bad, but wasn't worth the rest of it for me. The MT happened to be a woman, but her gender was pretty irrelevant to the experience. I wouldn't have felt any different about the experience had she been a man.
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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A couple years ago for our anniversary, my husband and I had a gift certificate to a snazzy resort/spa in town. We decided to go get hour long, full body Sweedish massages. I loved it! Both our MTs were women. When I called to schedule, they of course asked if we had gender preferences for our MTs. We didn't, but they said that most men were more comfortable with females.
Posts: 5879 | Registered: Apr 2001
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My partner used to have her own massage therapy business. I've had massages for various things, and I can't imagine getting a massage from a guy. It'd feel really weird.
Posts: 12266 | Registered: Jul 2005
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Yeah ketchupqueen, it wasn't much fun. I enjoyed having my back or shoulders rubbed, so I sort of wonder if it's possible that the MT just wasn't all that good. Or maybe she just specialized in a style of massage that doesn't work for me or something. I'd be willing to give a professional massage another shot.
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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I had a professional massage in Las Vegas, at the Paris spa. I believe it was an aromatherapy Swedish massage (or maybe deep-tissue?), and it was very relaxing. It wasn't really painful at the time, but my shoulders especially were rather tender for a day or so afterwards.
I was in Vegas with two other girls. We all got massages, but I was the only one whose masseuse ended up being male. I think the other two were relieved that theirs were female - I had no strong feelings either way, but I did feel a bit self-conscious. There was a fair amount of bravado on my part.
Actually, the really memorable thing about it was finding out that my masseuse was Mormon and had gone to the Philippines on his mission, which is where a lot of my family is from, so that was a kind of odd coincidence. He was also the first practicing Mormon I'd ever met (and AFAIK the only one I've met in person thus far). At the time I knew next to nothing about LDS practices, and I didn't realize that going on missions is really pretty common and not just for the super-duper-holy, so altogether it seemed a very strange juxtaposition.
Posts: 952 | Registered: Jun 2005
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You should go see Lurker-Girl, Noemon. She has the healing touch. And she uses hypo-allergenic massage gel-- even I didn't react and I'm sensitive to everything-- I'm even allergic to rubbing alcohol. Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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Hypo-allergenic massage oil would definitely be a plus. If I should ever happen to meet Lurker-Girl, and she should be willing, I'll happily accept a massage from her.
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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Now all you have to do is convince her to come to a con near you and bring her gear. That or convince them to hold another DallasCon and attend it.
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She would have enjoyed Noemonicon then. There is still leftover chocolate from that, and it was several weeks ago (by the way Sara, I don't know if I've mentioned it elsewhere or not, but Vosges dark chocolate with wasabi, ginger, and black sesame seeds is officially the best bar I've ever had, period).
I wish that I had the leavetime to go to a gathering in Dallas. I've got an old friend in Houston and a brother in Austin, so it'd be fun to spend a couple of weeks traversing the state visiting people. Unfortunately I'm having to save up for my brother's wedding next August, so I'm not going to be able to do a lot of travelling in the meantime. Not that you were seriously suggesting the DallasCon thing, but it sounds like all sorts of fun, hypo-allergenic massages or not.
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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I've had professional massages and loved them. They've always been by a man, just the way it worked out, but I wouldn't have a problem with a woman giving me a massage. It's not a sexual experience...it's just a wonderful, sometimes painful, luxury that I take advantage to have whenever I can. I carry a lot of tension in my shoulders, and while it hurts to get massaged out, it feels so good afterward.
Posts: 5948 | Registered: Jun 2001
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quote:(by the way Sara, I don't know if I've mentioned it elsewhere or not, but Vosges dark chocolate with wasabi, ginger, and black sesame seeds is officially the best bar I've ever had, period).
I will send you some more, then.
Posts: 14017 | Registered: May 2000
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It is homophobic to feel that way, but most men (including myself) have felt it. It's a mild case of it that can be fixed
My massage therapist I see him (2-3 times a year) is awesome. I had a massage by a woman at the same practice, and it wasn't so good.
Interestingly, she was back up in this area from Texas (where her husband still was, doing his job) because she felt people took massage much more seriously up here in the northeast. She said that there was a lot of pressure in Texas (she was in the Houston or Dallas area, I believe) for women massueses to provide "sexual massage". She hadn't felt that here ever (she was originally from the area).
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I don't think it's necessarily homophobic to not want a massage by the same sex. I've never had one, but if I did I'd want a straight man, because (and this is just my experience) women will judge another woman's body a lot more harshly than a straight guy who's trying to conceal his inner "oooh, breasts!"
Posts: 866 | Registered: Dec 2003
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But a really professional MT of either gender and any orientation will only give you the healing vibe-- never a thought that they are judging your body at all. Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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I've never had a professional massage that I've paid for, but I did have a friend who was an awesome massage therapist. If I slept over at his house, I would wake him up at ridiculous hours and ask for massages.
I've gotten backrubs from/given backrubs to female friends before, and it's never bothered me either way. The only reason I prefer massages by men is that their hands are generally stronger. Girls are so wimpy about it.
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Lurker-Girl has strong enough technique to go too deep on *me*, which takes some doing. I would definitely not characterize her massages as "wimpy", though she is quite small, herself.
Posts: 3846 | Registered: Apr 2004
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Lurker-Girl appears to be having trouble with her account but has asked me to post the following for her:
quote:It's all in the body mechanics.
KQ, thanks for the kind words, as always. I miss y'all too--I haven't been on hatrack in awhile, but a little bird told me my name came up.
And if gasoline weren't so dang expensive I'd drive around giving massages to hatrackers in exchange for chocolate.
I move that future cons/shindas/and other gatherings take up a collection to bring Lurker-Girl in for Massage/Chocolate exchanges
Posts: 3846 | Registered: Apr 2004
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Never had a massage. I ought to have had one, but my damn parents wouldn't do a think no matter how my back felt. "We didn't know", said they. Bullshit.
Nope, never had one. I won't ever have one at this rate.
Posts: 2978 | Registered: Oct 2004
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Never had a professional massage, but I'd love one. Coincidentally, just today the girl who sits behind me in Hebrew class gave me one because I was bored and asked nicely I think I might be a little bit uncomfortable if one of my male friends gave me one, but I might not care if it was a close friend who I know it wouldn't be awkward with.
Posts: 853 | Registered: Feb 2004
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I love massages. My mom gives great ones, and my ex's weren't bad. But the best are from professional masseuses like Lurker-Girl and my IRL friend.
I would be uncomfortable getting one from a guy (unless we were related). Posts: 32919 | Registered: Mar 2003
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If you wait till you have insurance and get a referral from your OB, it might be covered. (Almost certainly will be if you go to a PT or chiropractor.)
Posts: 32919 | Registered: Mar 2003
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I know what I want for Christmas, though. My mom was telling me someone gave her a gift certificate to the lady she uses, who has been practicing 10 years and has a Masters and is very good.
Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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I've had so many massages that I can't even begin to count them. That's because I am a massage therapist. I've had and am trained in everything from swedish to russian sports massage, reflexology to cranial-sacral therapy. I really need a massage right now, actually, since I haven't had one since I gave birth.
kq, I know you're in CA, but are you close to LA? I have a classmate that specializes in prenatal massage. He's incredible. Let me know if you're near by, and I can give you his info.
Posts: 161 | Registered: Jul 2002
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Igive really good massages, just ask JenniK. Really, I do, I have given massages to friends who were studying MT at teh time and they said I was better at it than anyone in their class was, eevn untrained.
I audited a course on it once, but I didn't learn much from it, so I stopped going....they were way too basic.
I have had massages as well, both professionally and otherwise ( ), and I love them.
Posts: 15082 | Registered: Jul 2001
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rivka, it looks like massage is not covered under that definition. Plus, I'd probably have to drive 2 hours to see a chiropractor who accepts Medi-Cal. Plus, many of them won't work on pregnant women. *grumps*
Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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I forgot to answer the gender question. It doesn't bother me one way or the other. My husband is bothered by me seeing a male, though. He's also bothered by him seeing a male. I have no problem with him or me seeing one or the other. He thinks that's weird.
I did have one weird experience last summer when a man came in for a massage and left when he found out I was a female. That ha never happened to me or any other therapist I know. Most males will only see females.
Posts: 161 | Registered: Jul 2002
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quote:Originally posted by ketchupqueen: rivka, it looks like massage is not covered under that definition. Plus, I'd probably have to drive 2 hours to see a chiropractor who accepts Medi-Cal. Plus, many of them won't work on pregnant women. *grumps*
As I said, it would probably have to be a PT or a chiropractor to be covered. No idea about whether there are any nearby. I think the one I went to accepted Medi-Cal, but it's been 6 years. And she was in Silverlake. Posts: 32919 | Registered: Mar 2003
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I have given and received massages to and from both men and women, but none of these massages have been professional. I did have a guy offer to pay me for backrubs on a regular basis. I did not take him up on it, only in part because that particular guy was a little creepy.
I definitely give more massages than I receive, and most of them are to women. I'd probably be more comfortable giving a man a massage than most men would be to receive a massage from me. Also, I'm more comfortable giving a guy (or a girl I'm not interested in) a massage than receiving one from same. I think that probably has to do with control, and would be a non-issue if it was a professional massage therapist.
Now, that's not too bad from here-- only about 25 minutes with good traffic, 40 with terrible.
quote:I'll ask if she knows anyone in your neck of the woods.
That would be wonderful, thank you. Glendale, Pasadena, and Burbank are all very reasonable drives for us. And even if she knows anyone with very reasonable rates-- I'm not above paying for it if I need it that bad.
Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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I've been getting professional massages for years. My advice would be to find a traditional asian massage place that does remedial, deep tissue and/or relaxation. I prefer deep tissue - if it ain't huring it ain't working!
It's never bothered me having either guys or girls going at it.
Posts: 2245 | Registered: Nov 1998
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Good luck finding someone. Aristide (my friend) would be worth it, if you'd just give him a chance. And if you told him that Steph from DV16 Recommended him, he may give you a deal. You never know.
Posts: 161 | Registered: Jul 2002
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