posted
It did. And it happened a few times with a few different teachers, as I recall.
And I think they were mostly in Florida.
As a matter of fact, at my school, a teacher was fired after having been under investigation by the FBI for sexual emails to a student. *wanders off to find article*
posted
We had a French teacher in middle school who stalked female students. Luckily, he's been fired and indicted.
Posts: 1735 | Registered: Oct 2004
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posted
Try this link for more info. My favorite part is this quote from her attorney:
quote:Fitzgibbons said in July that plea negotiations had broken off because prosecutors insisted on prison time, which he said would be too dangerous for someone as attractive as Lafave.
Pretty people can't do time! When will people learn?
Posts: 7790 | Registered: Aug 2000
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posted
Wow am I glad that a hot teacher didn't have sex with me when I was 14.
Not to belittle her crime, but I would bet dollars to donuts that the "victim" still considers that day the best day of his life.
I understand why the laws are there, and agree with their necessity, but forgive me if I don't shed any tears for him.
Posts: 5656 | Registered: Oct 1999
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posted
Actually, the 'victim' and her were kind of dating, if I remember right from the original article, back when this story first broke.
Posts: 5462 | Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
I just hope that judge realizes what a laughingstock he'll be from now on. I wait in rapture for next season's Law and Order. ^___^
Posts: 4816 | Registered: Apr 2003
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posted
Maybe it's insensitive of me, but I remember being 14, and consensual sex with a twenty-something would not have been I would've thought I needed protection from.
I know that a 14 year old can't have consensual sex, not being of the age of consent. But I knew plenty, male and female, who did. I thought it was a bad idea for the most part.
But I think X's point was that the victim was probably not all that traumatized by the incident.
Posts: 5462 | Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
I want to state that when i was 14, I would have... Sorry, there is no delicate way of putting this... I would have cut my left nut off to loose my virginity to a woman as attractive as that one... I mean just imagine how many boys thought of this reading teacher as they lay in their beds drifting off to sleep...
Posts: 1094 | Registered: Mar 2004
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quote:Sorry, there is no delicate way of putting this...
How about "Would have really, really, really liked to . . . "?
quote:I would have cut my left nut off to loose my virginity to a woman as attractive as that one...
After you do that a couple of times, though, it loses its allure.
-o-
I'm intrigued by the notion that the attractiveness of the person to whom you lose your virginity has some long-term importance. Do you keep a picture of your first partner in your wallet and pull it out to compare?
Posts: 13680 | Registered: Mar 2002
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posted
Well, the first one is the one that you'll never forget at any point in time... unless you were intoxicated... in which case... it shouldn't count...
Posts: 1094 | Registered: Mar 2004
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posted
Ummm I think you can ask Breyerchic about me and my lack of shame... It's just one of those things, you want your first time to be perfect, I know mine wasn't, but I also don't have a great track record...
Are you saying that you as a 14 year old male, wouldn't have loved to loose it to that attractive woman?
Posts: 1094 | Registered: Mar 2004
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posted
See, if it was 14 year old girl and 25 year old, extremely HOT male teacher, you wouldn't be using the "victim" quotes, even if the girl in question really enjoyed the sex. It wouldn't be an issue.
Posts: 9293 | Registered: Aug 2000
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posted
Then would you say that in a case of a 17 year old with an attractive 28 year old, the 17 year old, who is still legally a child, is a victim?
Posts: 1094 | Registered: Mar 2004
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posted
I would say that if you are a child, legally, intellectually, and in terms of experience--as a seventeen-year-old is--and you have sex with someone who is half-again as old as you are, yes, you have been in an unequal relationship, with someone who, as far as the evidence shows, has some issues relating with other adults, and must therefore sleep with children in order to be on a superior footing. I would say that such a relationship is unethical, unhealthy, and predatory. And as the younger person, the one less likely to be intelligent enough to say no, the one naive enough to think this is a good thing, you are the victim. And the "adult," who should have known better but did not care, is the victimizer.
Yes.
That answer your question? Posts: 13680 | Registered: Mar 2002
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quote:Originally posted by J T Stryker: Then would you say that in a case of a 17 year old with an attractive 28 year old, the 17 year old, who is still legally a child, is a victim?
If that 28 year old happened to be that child's teacher, certainly.
Of course, the line gets more blurred the closer one gets to the age of consent. In Australia, the age of consent is 16 - so a 17 year old sleeping with a 28 year old would be legal.
However, it is not legal here for a teacher to sleep with their student if that student is under 18. A 28 year old teacher sleeping with a 17 year old student could, and probably would be prosecuted.
I think this is an important law, as it recognises the position of power and influence any teacher will have over their students, and the inevitable consequence that will have on any relationship between them.
However, the facts of this case was the child was 14. Not 17. I don't think this one of the cases that blurs the line.
Posts: 4393 | Registered: Aug 2003
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quote:The boy told investigators the two had sex in a classroom at the school, located in Temple Terrace near Tampa, in her Riverview town house and once in a vehicle while his 15-year-old cousin drove them around Marion County.
!?!
Okay seriously, how stupid can you get? Did they want to be caught?
Posts: 9866 | Registered: Apr 2002
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Only if you consider sex somehow inherantly harmful.
quote:See, if it was 14 year old girl and 25 year old, extremely HOT male teacher, you wouldn't be using the "victim" quotes, even if the girl in question really enjoyed the sex. It wouldn't be an issue.
Of course it would. If the sex was consensual, and both are sexual developed (ie, no pedophilia involved), then nothing evil happened.
That leaves aside the question of legality, of course. This woman should be prosecuted
Posts: 1515 | Registered: Feb 2002
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quote: Only if you consider sex somehow inherantly harmful
Or, only if you consider sex below the age of consent with a person in a position of influence and responsibility inherently harmful.
Posts: 4393 | Registered: Aug 2003
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quote:Originally posted by Icarus: I would say that if you are a child, legally, intellectually, and in terms of experience--as a seventeen-year-old is--and you have sex with someone who is half-again as old as you are, yes, you have been in an unequal relationship, with someone who, as far as the evidence shows, has some issues relating with other adults, and must therefore sleep with children in order to be on a superior footing. I would say that such a relationship is unethical, unhealthy, and predatory. And as the younger person, the one less likely to be intelligent enough to say no, the one naive enough to think this is a good thing, you are the victim. And the "adult," who should have known better but did not care, is the victimizer.
Yes.
That answer your question?
But if an 18-year-old has sex with a 29-year-old, it's legal.
Therefore, on the 18th birthday, a magical maturity switch is flipped.
Sure it's arbitrary. But I can't think of a better way to do it, can you?
At some point a law legislating with respect to age will have to have an arbitrary line. The fact that it does is not an argument against the law, or the behaviour it is regulating.
Posts: 4393 | Registered: Aug 2003
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posted
I was 15 when I was having sex with my then boyfriend, who was 24.
I was not at all a victim and I remember him fondly. I think it's entirely possible for a young girl to have sex with an older man and be okay about it.
However I do feel that it's wrong for a teacher to have sex with a student, regardless of age.
Posts: 870 | Registered: Mar 2005
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quote:But if an 18-year-old has sex with a 29-year-old, it's legal.
Therefore, on the 18th birthday, a magical maturity switch is flipped.
Everything I said applies to your example too; your example is simply not illegal. Any line that is drawn must necessarily be arbitrary. It is impossible to find a well-defined line in a gray area. That's true in a lot of other circumstances besides sex. JT's case in in the gray, as is yours. He wanted an answer, so I gave him one. The difference between the two is which side of the legal line they are on. Does a switch flip in you when you turn eighteen? No. Eighteen-year-olds are generally immature, too. Is an eighteen year old with a thirty year old a healthy sexual relationship? Almost certainly not. But at some point we have to stop protecting you and trust you to make your own messes and deal with their own consequences.
I know that, as a relatively young person, you don't like what I'm saying. You believe you have all the knowledge and wisdom of the ages, and can point to many examples of stupid and immature older people to back you up (as if that somehow means anything). It's pretty much inevitable; one of the characteristics of being this age is believing you in fact are more knowledgeable and more wise that you really are.
Heck, I remember the time not too long ago when a Hatracker just under the age of eighteen took it upon herself to jeopardize my career. There was no convincing her that she was wrong, because she knew better than everyone else what was right for them, and she was incensed at any suggestion that this was not true. She took it upon herself to decide whether the threat she posed to my career was legitimate or not, and dismissed my concerns out of hand. She was so certain she knew better than anyone else, that she deceived me and the other people who shared my concern, and probably thought that she was so clever that we could not see how she was manipulating us. This is pretty typical high school mentality: the rules are arbitrary and unfair. They don't apply to mature people such as yourself. You shouldn't have to follow arbitrary rules that clearly aren't meant for you. It's okay if you connive to get around such rules.
I don't expect to convince you. Posts: 13680 | Registered: Mar 2002
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posted
I realize that it's arbitrary. I just have issues with this law and the ways in which it's enforced.
I don't think it's right for teachers to have sex with their students, but I must admit, I and each of my three current roommates have all dated teachers at some point (I'm not sure if anyone had sex with one, though). Not teachers from our own schools, though, and I think everyone was above the age of consent. It does kind of unnerve me, though. Of course, it also unnerves me to learn that teachers have lives.
You guys know how I feel about sex for myself (what other people do is their own business), but a lot of the guys I dated in high school were in their twenties, and I never felt as though I were being taken advantage of by them. In fact, I felt the guys my age were much more likely to be manipulative and pushy than the older men, so I feel it's unfair to automatically assume that an older person sleeping with a younger person is a predator.
posted
I'm sure you do feel okay about it, treason, but I wonder why your twenty-four year old boyfriend felt more comfortable dating and bedding a child barely more than half his own age than finding a date among his peers.
Posts: 13680 | Registered: Mar 2002
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quote:I felt the guys my age were much more likely to be manipulative and pushy than the older men, . . .
Or maybe they were merely more likely to be transparent about it.
Possible, but as I don't have sex....
I'm not saying that older guys can't be predatory. The man I was going to marry was eight years my senior and almost certainly just looking for some young, impressionable girl he could turn into his housewife, completely fixated on him. I'm just saying older does not necessarily mean predatory.
I also DEFINLTEY don't think this woman was right. Or the teacher from my high school. Or a professor I heard of here who was rumored to be sleeping with a student.
quote: I'm just saying older does not necessarily mean predatory.
Of course it doesn't.
But because it can, and because people in a position of trust and responsibility and influence can abuse that position, we as a society have to protect people. And in the case of sexual relations, that means protecting the younger person (or child).
Posts: 4393 | Registered: Aug 2003
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quote:I'm just saying older does not necessarily mean predatory.
I don't think older means predatory.
I think that older AND looking for a substantially younger sexual partner--and lets arbitrarily define "substantially younger" as being both a teenager and close to half of his/her own age--make for very troubling signs. These in combination make me believe a relationship is unhealthy much more often than not, and that the older person is being predatory, again, much more often than not.
quote: In fact, I felt the guys my age were much more likely to be manipulative and pushy than the older men, so I feel it's unfair to automatically assume that an older person sleeping with a younger person is a predator.
No, it's not. Not even a LITTLE unfair.
Posts: 37449 | Registered: May 1999
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posted
Foust, Pleasure does not preclude harm, and sex is not inherently harmful. I don't see the connection there.
Let me explain. It is not unheard of for males to become erect or ejaculate while being taken anally without consent. This is a biological result of having the prostate prodded. I doubt these people would say they were not 'harmed.' Actually, information on the subject would suggest thatthe pleasure factor is the worst the part of this sort of violation.
Not that it has anything to do with this topic, except to illustrate that "pleasure does not preclude harm" = "Sex is bad." I don't think sex is bad, but people can be harmed by it in that pleasure can bind you to someone who does not have your best interests at heart. Such as women who stay with abusive or manipulative men because the sex is good. Seen that one happen.
Icarus, I agree - There were times when I worked as a young adult at a teen summer camp, and so help me God, it would have been like shooting fish in a kitchen sink. Not that I would ever be so skanky
JT- for the record, I did not mean to seem like I was attacking you at all. I'm sure the uproar around the woman's trial has made the boy a victim in ways the actual acts probably did not. I just hate the implication that a boy is "lucky" to be having sex before he can shave, when a girl the same age would seen as an object of pity (or at least not the object of so many "whoa! way to go!" types of comments.
Not that they might not be accurate in either case.
Posts: 9293 | Registered: Aug 2000
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