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Evie and I have dueled. Here follows the events of this morning.
I am RochtalAlphkrist. Evie is obvious. Our seconds change often.
You have just entered room "sworddueltothedeath." Who Broke My TV has entered the room. punjabi gal13 has entered the room. RochtalAlphkrist: Duelers, here? punjabi gal13: I am loving the name of this room evie3217: I am here Who Broke My TV: yo yo RochtalAlphkrist: Seconds too. RochtalAlphkrist: All right. RochtalAlphkrist: Quite simple. RochtalAlphkrist: This is to be a duel of swords, entirely spoken. RochtalAlphkrist: Should a dueler be rendered unable to continue, the second must take up their sword. RochtalAlphkrist: Are we ready, Evie? evie3217: I am ready RochtalAlphkrist: Good. RochtalAlphkrist: *draws sword* evie3217: *draws sword and holds it in front of her face* RochtalAlphkrist: *a stylish sort, that you might find at Pier One if they sold weapons* Who Broke My TV: am i allowed to laugh? RochtalAlphkrist: ::clash!:: RochtalAlphkrist: Sure thing, mate. RochtalAlphkrist: *strikes for legs* evie3217: *Abby jabs* RochtalAlphkrist: *dodge* RochtalAlphkrist: *Phillip slashes* evie3217: *blocks8 evie3217: *parries* RochtalAlphkrist: *does triple somersault* evie3217: WHAT! RochtalAlphkrist: *and a cheesy lensflare* RochtalAlphkrist: Well, jeez, let's make this impressive to watch. punjabi gal13: lmao RochtalAlphkrist: It's not like it ended with a kick. evie3217: *runs to wall and flips over facing the opponent, sword ready* RochtalAlphkrist: *draws swordchucks . . .* RochtalAlphkrist: Ow! evie3217: *turns one sword into two and twirls them around her head* RochtalAlphkrist: *realizes to hold swordchucks is to slice off several fingers* RochtalAlphkrist: Goodbye, index. RochtalAlphkrist: Goodbye, thumb. evie3217: hahah RochtalAlphkrist: *throws swordchucks with full ninja skills* evie3217: *takes this opportunity to lunge, missing the swordchucks, and strikes out with her sword evie3217: * RochtalAlphkrist: AUGH! RochtalAlphkrist: That jacket was expensive, you know! evie3217: they always are RochtalAlphkrist: *calls on gods of corduroy to guide my sword* RochtalAlphkrist: Hamina hamina swish! evie3217: corduroy? then it was meant to be distroyed RochtalAlphkrist: *slices* evie3217: *dices* RochtalAlphkrist: *juliennes* punjabi gal13: *prepares self to take the place of now gimpy and fashion-impaired first* evie3217: *juices* RochtalAlphkrist: *cubes* RochtalAlphkrist: *deep fries* evie3217: *batters* evie3217: *chops* RochtalAlphkrist: *cuts into gingerbread men* RochtalAlphkrist: *covers in sprinkles* evie3217: *sauces* RochtalAlphkrist: *and chocolate chips* evie3217: mmmMmm RochtalAlphkrist: Now your guard's down. RochtalAlphkrist: *jabs* RochtalAlphkrist: *slices* evie3217: DAMNIT! RochtalAlphkrist: Just a flesh wound, eh? evie3217: *blocks the slice* evie3217: I'll live *determined look on her face* RochtalAlphkrist: Hm. evie3217: *lunges* RochtalAlphkrist: *gods of corduroy bless sword* punjabi gal13 has left the room. RochtalAlphkrist: *parries* RochtalAlphkrist: Whoa . .. evie3217: umm...ouch RochtalAlphkrist: Time out, let me grab a new second. evie3217: that's gotta hurt evie3217: okay evie3217: having fun Emily? RochtalAlphkrist: OK, she's back. Who Broke My TV: oh Who Broke My TV: yeah Who Broke My TV: totally evie3217: oh good RochtalAlphkrist: Sooner or later. RochtalAlphkrist: Wait for it . .. wait for it . .. evie3217: haha....Black Mage, what's your real name? RochtalAlphkrist: Phillip evie3217: okay, cool RochtalAlphkrist: And yours, I suppose, is Abbie? evie3217: mine's Abby evie3217: yes sir RochtalAlphkrist: *Abby RochtalAlphkrist: All right then, pleasure to get acquainted with my Simulpost Slave. Who Broke My TV: can i go to bed? Who Broke My TV: i like Who Broke My TV: cant keep my eyes open evie3217: It makes it easier to know the name of your opponent evie3217: go to sleep emily evie3217: I'll ttyl punjabi gal13 has entered the room. Who Broke My TV: sorry abby haha Who Broke My TV: good luck! evie3217: thanks Who Broke My TV has left the room. RochtalAlphkrist: Oh, my gal's back! evie3217: and mine's left RochtalAlphkrist: And I just invited a new second . .. evie3217: just a sec punjabi gal13: yeah, sorry, technical difficulties RochtalAlphkrist: OK. RochtalAlphkrist: I can lend you one, if need be. aqueus in motus has entered the room. aqueus in motus: what? punjabi gal13: yay, it's ly-chan :-D aqueus in motus: wth is his? RochtalAlphkrist: Emily, would you mind being Abby's second, actually? RochtalAlphkrist: A duel, darling. aqueus in motus: second what? punjabi gal13: it's rather entertaining evie3217: no, I got one comin aqueus in motus: what?? Zapppa has entered the room. aqueus in motus: omg aqueus in motus: i was girly today aqueus in motus: i flirted with a guy at work RochtalAlphkrist: Ly, you can spectate. RochtalAlphkrist: We're dueling here, darling. aqueus in motus: who are all these people!!?? RochtalAlphkrist: *lunges at Abby* evie3217: I'm Abby RochtalAlphkrist: Erm . . just people. evie3217: WAIT! RochtalAlphkrist: Don't worry. RochtalAlphkrist: Sit back and enjoy the show. evie3217: we have to explain RochtalAlphkrist: Fine, fine. punjabi gal13: yes, love-life details can be given at a later time RochtalAlphkrist: I challenged Abby to a duel. punjabi gal13: right now somebody has to um... die. RochtalAlphkrist: We are now fighting. evie3217: we needed seconds evie3217: ok go RochtalAlphkrist: I called you 'cause I lost Becka for a moment, and thought I needed a new second. RochtalAlphkrist: All right. evie3217: *lunges at phillip* RochtalAlphkrist: *ducks* evie3217: *jabs* RochtalAlphkrist: *uses corduroy kick* evie3217: *Slashes* RochtalAlphkrist: Learned it from the Karate Kid. evie3217: nice RochtalAlphkrist: *slices at neck height* evie3217: *ducks* aqueus in motus: beck who are these people? aqueus in motus: *becka RochtalAlphkrist: *allows camera to do a slow-motion spin around me* evie3217: *slices at hip* punjabi gal13: hush dear, they're trying to kill each other :-P RochtalAlphkrist: *jumps back* aqueus in motus: ??? aqueus in motus: @.@ RochtalAlphkrist: Are we allowed to summon creatures of light or darkness to aid us? evie3217: *does a flip off his back and comes back facing him....staring him down* RochtalAlphkrist: Such as Scruffy the Puppy? evie3217: no, it's just us RochtalAlphkrist: Oh, fine. evie3217: hahah punjabi gal13: I can put on devil horns if need be punjabi gal13: :-P RochtalAlphkrist: Cool. punjabi gal13: and pick up a pitchfork at Eddie's Trick shop RochtalAlphkrist: *spins and uses X-Man powers to multiply swords* evie3217: would scruffy the puppy be evil? RochtalAlphkrist: *and bodies, for that matter* RochtalAlphkrist: Damn straight he is. RochtalAlphkrist: Now there are three of me. evie3217: alright then aqueus in motus: XD RochtalAlphkrist: Two are holograms. RochtalAlphkrist: Which will you attack? evie3217: *does back flip RochtalAlphkrist: Mwahaha. RochtalAlphkrist: *does three back flips* RochtalAlphkrist: *and a swan dive* aqueus in motus: showoff evie3217: *does four back flips* RochtalAlphkrist: *curses at French judge for low score* punjabi gal13: LMAO aqueus in motus: hey RochtalAlphkrist: *throws sword chucks* aqueus in motus: we're not dissing aqueus in motus: we're not dissing the french here RochtalAlphkrist: *again* evie3217: *ducks matrix style* Zapppa: *Throws Poke-ball* punjabi gal13: *cheers Phillip on* Zapppa: I choose you, Mew-Two, eradicate these simpletons. aqueus in motus: pppppfff! RochtalAlphkrist: *shoorts Mewtwo* Zapppa: *Those who would stand before me are crushed beneath the enormous mental powers of Mew-Two.* RochtalAlphkrist: I'm allowed to draw a pistol to deal with that sort, no? evie3217: shoorts? is that a new verb I should knwo about? RochtalAlphkrist: *leans rather than stands before Zappa* RochtalAlphkrist: Yes. evie3217: go afead punjabi gal13: *puts on cheerleading outfit and is utterly confused at the sight of pompoms... * Um... ra ra ra... go phillip? Zapppa: *I am covered with the splattered brains of my enemies, and commence consumption of the fallen corpses to rejuvenate my health* RochtalAlphkrist: To "shoort" is to shoot a garlicked bullet. evie3217: ahhhhh RochtalAlphkrist: What's afead? evie3217: of course aqueus in motus: lmao evie3217: ahead** evie3217: I can't type damnit Zapppa: Exeunt. Zapppa has left the room. RochtalAlphkrist: It's an old Sicilian trick, the garlic. RochtalAlphkrist: Hm. evie3217: hhm..... RochtalAlphkrist: You've lost a second. evie3217: I know RochtalAlphkrist: Ly, be a munchkin . .. aqueus in motus: oh shut up about your sicilian blah blah blah aqueus in motus: what? aqueus in motus: munchikin? punjabi gal13: Ly, you are now Abby's second, I gather aqueus in motus: i will not be a doughnut whole aqueus in motus: who is abby?? aqueus in motus: i've never met abby!! RochtalAlphkrist: Abby is Evie. evie3217: I'm abby and I'm a very nice person, I promise RochtalAlphkrist: She's from the Internet. RochtalAlphkrist: The Internet is for porn. evie3217: yes...I live there RochtalAlphkrist: Therefore, Abby is a porn star. aqueus in motus: are you a real person/ aqueus in motus: oh RochtalAlphkrist: You'll like her. aqueus in motus: i forgot evie3217: hahhahah aqueus in motus: porn stars don't look like real people RochtalAlphkrist: Depends. evie3217: I think that's the best things I've heard in a while RochtalAlphkrist: Thank you. RochtalAlphkrist: *executes deep bow* evie3217: great reasoning as well RochtalAlphkrist: CRUCIO! RochtalAlphkrist: Dark wizards always cheat. evie3217: *pounbds him over the head while in the bow* aqueus in motus: brb. gotta go do some dishes RochtalAlphkrist: Ho! aqueus in motus: no RochtalAlphkrist: Let's just say screw the seconds. evie3217: so it's a wizards duel now? RochtalAlphkrist: Mano a mano. aqueus in motus: i'm a whore of babylon RochtalAlphkrist: Just me an you. RochtalAlphkrist: *and punjabi gal13: oy, I still want to spectate!!! RochtalAlphkrist: Sure. punjabi gal13: I DEMAND IT!!! RochtalAlphkrist: But no interference. punjabi gal13: *dies* because you two are entirely too funny RochtalAlphkrist: Thank you. punjabi gal13: oh, the only thing I shall be doing is cheering you on, Peanut :-P evie3217: hahah...you have quite a floowing RochtalAlphkrist: *calls on WASPs from Connecticut country club* RochtalAlphkrist: Of course. punjabi gal13: once I figure out how these work *stares at pompoms* RochtalAlphkrist: I'm dead sexy. evie3217: Hey! I am a WASP! punjabi gal13: you are though :-D RochtalAlphkrist: So, it's a wizard's duel. evie3217: well, I'm a porn star, so there punjabi gal13: if you weren't gay *innocence* RochtalAlphkrist: Oh no, I've called on your natural allies! evie3217: *Expelliaramus* RochtalAlphkrist: Wait, you're in Drama. RochtalAlphkrist: Hence no WASP will take yor side. evie3217: your point? evie3217: hell no, I'm friends with all the WASPs! RochtalAlphkrist: *draws double-ended, Darth Maul-style wand* RochtalAlphkrist: Now you're asking for it. RochtalAlphkrist: IMPEDIMENTA! evie3217: you're just gonna point it at yourself, you do know that RochtalAlphkrist: I twirl it, dear. RochtalAlphkrist: I'm gifted. evie3217: umm...you dont' have a wand, because I already took it from you...see above RochtalAlphkrist: This is my second wand. RochtalAlphkrist: I kill Jedi and take their wands. evie3217: WHAT! RochtalAlphkrist: While coughing. evie3217: no one has 2 wands evie3217: hahah RochtalAlphkrist: And talking in a generically east European accent. RochtalAlphkrist: *fires off curse* evie3217: Well I'm talking in a Scottish acent* RochtalAlphkrist: Soviets pwn Scots. evie3217: *my foul breath stops the spell in it's tracks RochtalAlphkrist: Sorry, it's just that Communism beats Presbyterianism every time. punjabi gal13: get to some fighting or I'll be kicking both your hairless pink bahookeys, damnit RochtalAlphkrist: *swings sword* RochtalAlphkrist: *blows horn of Gondor* evie3217: *slices* evie3217: *brings out the oliphants* RochtalAlphkrist: *admires sexiness of Aragorn, despite depressing deadness of Aragorn* RochtalAlphkrist: *helps Gollum season the stew* evie3217: ahh...I second that RochtalAlphkrist: *throws boiling stew in Abby's face* evie3217: AGGHHHH! RochtalAlphkrist: Whahaha! evie3217: finds rock and throw it at Phillip's face* RochtalAlphkrist: You are defenseless against cilantro! RochtalAlphkrist: Ow! aqueus in motus: ok, back RochtalAlphkrist: That was my eye! RochtalAlphkrist: My bloody eye. evie3217: *has philip on the ground* punjabi gal13: *slips phillip some taters* RochtalAlphkrist: Do you know how hard those are to get nowadays? evie3217: *with a knife to this throat* evie3217: do you yield? aqueus in motus: why aren't they dead yet? RochtalAlphkrist: *uses taters to make omnipo-stew* RochtalAlphkrist: *blocks knife with spare tater* RochtalAlphkrist: I do not. RochtalAlphkrist: And I shall not.. RochtalAlphkrist: *ladles out bowl of omnipo-stew* evie3217: *picks up Phillip and crushes him agains the cliff wall* RochtalAlphkrist: Abby, would you like something to eat? evie3217: No RochtalAlphkrist: It's chilly 'round here. RochtalAlphkrist: Oh, fine. RochtalAlphkrist: *throws Abby off* RochtalAlphkrist: *plunges Abby's head in boiling stew* evie3217: I think you have the cliff mixed up RochtalAlphkrist: Do you yield, punk? RochtalAlphkrist: What now? evie3217: NEVER! RochtalAlphkrist: *kicks Abby in groin* evie3217: I wasn't thinking we were at the bottom of the cliff, but oh well RochtalAlphkrist: How about now? evie3217: that doesn't affect me as much as it would affect you *Kicks Phillip in the groin* punjabi gal13: *covers face* ooooooooohhhhh RochtalAlphkrist: *rolls around on ground, praying for omnipo-stew to save me* punjabi gal13: it just got ugly RochtalAlphkrist: *jumps up an lunges* RochtalAlphkrist: Haha! You missed! I feinted! evie3217: *jumps out of the way* RochtalAlphkrist: *audience faints in relief* aqueus in motus: why isn't QE here? doesn't he fence? RochtalAlphkrist: *twirls moustache sexily* evie3217: *slices off the moustache* RochtalAlphkrist: Now, for my daring finishing move! evie3217: *and a few fingers with it* RochtalAlphkrist: *whips sword from Abby's hands* punjabi gal13: *swoons* Oh phillip! *handkerchief falls to ground* evie3217: WHAT! RochtalAlphkrist: *whimpers* RochtalAlphkrist: I lost my pinkie finger . .. RochtalAlphkrist: It was so . . .sexy . .. RochtalAlphkrist: Without it, what power have I? evie3217: *pulls out a pistol and pistol whips phillip* RochtalAlphkrist: *dodges* evie3217: *backhands him* punjabi gal13: *slips Phillip Indiana Jones bullwhip* RochtalAlphkrist: *shoots cutlery from nerf gun at Abby* RochtalAlphkrist: *uses bullwhip with astonishing skill* RochtalAlphkrist: Do you wear glasses? evie3217: *blocks with my styrefoam shield* evie3217: nope RochtalAlphkrist: Contacts? evie3217: nope evie3217: sorry RochtalAlphkrist: Prosthetics of any kind? evie3217: no, but I am radioactive at the moment RochtalAlphkrist: Fine. punjabi gal13: take her bra off with it phillip!!! evie3217: does that help aqueus in motus: @.@! RochtalAlphkrist: *removes underwear with whip* RochtalAlphkrist: You're one sick hummer-sexial, Becka. punjabi gal13: :-D RochtalAlphkrist: *Abby's undies, not mine* evie3217: *uses super powers with amazing force to run at Phillip and take back her panties punjabi gal13: I'd say I try, but it really just comes naturally :-P RochtalAlphkrist: *sells panties on eBay* RochtalAlphkrist: *calls on pirate army* evie3217: no one would buy them RochtalAlphkrist: *fuses it with ninja army* punjabi gal13: *all dorks in universe worship the panties, like the scene on 16 Candles* evie3217: *calls on ninja army* evie3217: you can't have both RochtalAlphkrist: Oh .. . RochtalAlphkrist: *pirate army sends out representative for battle* aqueus in motus: ::shakes head:: RochtalAlphkrist: We call on . . .Orlando Depp! evie3217: ATTACK! *chaos ensues* RochtalAlphkrist: YARG! punjabi gal13: totally a Molly Ringwald moment there RochtalAlphkrist: YARG! RochtalAlphkrist: YARG! RochtalAlphkrist: *slices and dices all bodices in the vicinity* evie3217: ---- Ninjas don't say anytthing when they fight evie3217: they just dart and kill everything in their path punjabi gal13: *clasps bosom in shock* PHILLIP!!! *blushes in shame* RochtalAlphkrist: *pirates decorate belts with throwing stars* RochtalAlphkrist: Oh don't worry, darling, they're lovely. punjabi gal13: *stomps over, grabs bodice* I'll take that BACK, tyvm RochtalAlphkrist: Fine. RochtalAlphkrist: Women . .. evie3217: *spins around thrusts sword out killing many pirate evie3217: okay, my mind is starting to face *kills Phillip* evie3217: fade** RochtalAlphkrist: Mine was there from the beginning. punjabi gal13: oh no, sadness RochtalAlphkrist: AVADA KEDAVRA! evie3217: It's past 1, and I promised myself I was going to bed early RochtalAlphkrist: Fine. punjabi gal13: lol evie3217: you're dead, you can't talk aqueus in motus: thank you RochtalAlphkrist: Do you concede? aqueus in motus: now can we speak punjabi gal13: it's his ghost aqueus in motus: like normal peo RochtalAlphkrist: I'm not dead yet! aqueus in motus: oh jesus! RochtalAlphkrist: I feel happy! evie3217: I killed you! aqueus in motus: why can't you die already! RochtalAlphkrist: I feel happy! punjabi gal13: you just killed his evil twin aqueus in motus: no, hush1 RochtalAlphkrist: It's just a flesh wound! evie3217: oh, now twins are involved in this? aqueus in motus: he's dead! aqueus in motus: no! aqueus in motus: they aren't! aqueus in motus: he's dead! RochtalAlphkrist: I had two extras, recall? evie3217: your head's been cut off! RochtalAlphkrist: I made them early on. punjabi gal13: *steps in* aqueus in motus: ... punjabi gal13: That's right. aqueus in motus: ::weird people:: punjabi gal13: hehehe aqueus in motus: make up your mind as to the mental state of your brain, please RochtalAlphkrist: All right, we'll call it a draw. evie3217: well...then *kills other two phillips* punjabi gal13: emily is so overwhelmed by all this aqueus in motus: be dead or alive, not both evie3217: alright, we shall duel again RochtalAlphkrist: Oh. evie3217: it's a draw RochtalAlphkrist: *ghost kills Abby* RochtalAlphkrist: Fine. RochtalAlphkrist: Draw.
Posts: 767 | Registered: Oct 2003
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Oh dear! Is this what I'm missing by not AIM-ing? And here I was thinking it was all silliness.
Posts: 10397 | Registered: Jun 2005
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Well, that too. I mean, how will I have an objective measure of just how much time I am wasting if no one keeps track for me?
Posts: 10397 | Registered: Jun 2005
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wow, the first half of the duel was fun to read... then i scrolled down and saw that i was only halfway done reading. u guys could start your own internet skits, very comical.
Posts: 813 | Registered: Nov 1999
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Wow, we have challengers. Why does the HP-obsessed part of my brain tell me to make a Gilderoy handle and start a dueling club?
Posts: 767 | Registered: Oct 2003
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