posted
[in an allyway in a bad neighborhood] drug addict:i want some hatd stuff what do gots drug dealer:i will gige you a choice...take the blue pill you wake up in bed tomorrow and none of this will have ever happened take the red pill and i show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes
[when selling dishes] customer:how much is this set of teaspoons salesman:there is no spoon
Posts: 50 | Registered: Aug 2005
| IP: Logged |
posted
[at a graduation] welcome to the real world
[when giving somone a pot brownie] by the tine you're done with this cookie you'll feel right as rain
[telling a knock knock joke] guy1:knock knock neo guy2:who is it guy1:its me guy2:miisster annderson i've been expeeecting you
Posts: 50 | Registered: Aug 2005
| IP: Logged |
Boss guy: Thank you for applying. I will give you a phone call if you get the job, ok?
Guy trying to get job: Well, that sounds like a pretty good deal. But I think I may have a better one. How about I give you the finger ... and you give me my phone call?
Posts: 2054 | Registered: Nov 2005
| IP: Logged |
posted
News reporter: Mr. Jacques Chirac, how was your stay in the United States?
Jacques Chirac: I hate this place, this zoo, this prison, this reality, whatever you want to call it. I can't stand it any longer. It's the smell, if there is such a thing. I feel saturated by it. I can taste your stink, and every time I do, I fear that I've somehow been infected by it.
-----
News reporter: Mr. Bush, what does America need most right now?
President Bush: Guns. Lots of guns.
---- Edit: someone needs to think of a good one for "Ignorance is bliss". I don't think I'd be able to do it justice.
posted
President Bush to Tony Blair: Have you ever looked at it? Marvelled at it? Millions of people, living out their lives. Oblivious!... I can't stand it any longer. I have to get out, I have to get into England and you have the Key. MY key! And your going to give it to me.
Tony Blair: Whoa
School board Meeting: I believe that this night holds for each of us, the answer to a question we've been asking all our lives.
Parent: Ignorance is Bliss?
Posts: 9912 | Registered: Nov 2005
| IP: Logged |
posted
Supreme Court Judge: President Bush, how is it that you could imagine that secretly spying on Americans like this was in any way legal with what the constitution has to say?
New Reporter: President Bush, how do you feel about the government's slow response to Katrina in New Orleans and its resultant effect on your poll ratings?
President Bush: Ignorance is bliss.
******
I could probably do more with more time, but for now that's what I could come up with.
Posts: 3295 | Registered: Jun 2004
| IP: Logged |
Printer-friendly view of this topic
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
