posted
Not at any of you. I am offended at Deb. Why? Because I wanted to put up a "No Solicitors" sign on the glass door, and she said, "That's tacky and rude." Sonya said the same thing. They acted like I was asking for their permission, when I am paying a rent of over $2,300 per quarter. If I am paying this much, and so are they, who do they think they are to tell me I cannot put up a miserable sign on the door?! I don't need their permission and now they are mad at me because I called them "Nazi's". It is not the first time they deny me THE RIGHT to put up a sign and they expect me to apologize to them?! I understand the word I used was very strong, and I probably shouldn't have used it but the words just came out of my mouth and I honestly couldn't help it. But I'll be damned if I let them think I must have their permission to do something as miserably small as putting up a sign.
Deb thought the same thing of my idea to buy a "Get Lost" doormat. If she doesn't like it, well too bad. She can buy her own and set it down next to it, but by no means does she have the right to decide what I can and cannot do.
Posts: 3389 | Registered: Apr 2004
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posted
Mind you guys, I will apologize to them once things have cooled down. I realize that what I said was rather hurtful and a big no-no, but I am very offended at the moment and I just don't have it in me to ask for forgiveness at the moment.
Posts: 3389 | Registered: Apr 2004
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posted
She posts here from my computer, which is now password protected. I was getting pissed off at her using it, installing programs and downloading stuff without my permission.
Posts: 3389 | Registered: Apr 2004
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posted
The signs, particularly the "Get Lost" one, will be taken as a reflection not only of your intolerance, but theirs. I definitely would object to someone putting that meesage in front of my home; and keep in mind, just because I share my home with others, it is still my home.
The "No Solicitors" sign seems reasonable and not overly offensive to me.
Maybe you should discuss the reasons why you feel the need to not be disturbed by strangers, then decide with your roomies how to best address the issue.
Posts: 2425 | Registered: Jan 2002
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posted
The thing is that I feel I have a right to put up those things and they seem to disregard it like they had authority over me. As I said, they can put up their own signs, to explain my own even, if they like but I don't feel they have a right to censor me.
Posts: 3389 | Registered: Apr 2004
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posted
I agree with LadyDove. It's their space too, and whatever signs you put up reflect them. You're all paying equal amounts of money; shouldn't you all have an equal say in these sorts of matters?
Posts: 866 | Registered: Aug 2005
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The problem is that they do have the right to be concerned about how your sign reflects on them. It's their home too.
AoD, Please don't misunderstand me, I'm getting the impression that privacy is very important to you. It's your right to privacy that they have no right to deny. Your expression of that right as a sign on their/your door is the problem that you must work through.
In short, you don't have the right to force your sign on them. It's aggressive and mean to say that they aren't allowed to voice an opinion and outvote you on an issue this small. If there is a larger, underlying issue for the sign, you need to communicate with them and come to a joint decision.
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I just LOVE solicitors! I've been known to serve them hors d'oevres on a tray when they stop by.
Posts: 10397 | Registered: Jun 2005
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The way I look at it is, in my space, what I want goes. That is, if I want to have my room be messy as all nine circles of hell, well, that's my business. So long as strange smells don't leak out into the common areas. If you were putting this sign on your bedroom door, perhaps, I don't think your roomies would have any say in the matter.
But the living room, kitchen, bathrooms, and to the extent it's relevant, the outside of your house/apartment are shared spaces. That doesn't make it a free-for-all. I wouldn't put up anything without consulting my roomies first, or if I did, and they objected, I'd remove it. In this type of situation, democracy is the best policy, not anarchy.
Posts: 2907 | Registered: Nov 2005
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You're overreacting. They do have the right to tell you what to do if they agree about not wanting you to put out a sign or doormat. It's called being outvoted. Welcome to roommates. You'll disagree, but this is where you learn to compromise. Also, you learn that you're not the center of the universe.
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No Solicitor signs don't work anyways. My parents had its up all 18 years I lived with them. Never stopped a single person coming to the door and asking for money.
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Sorry Alt, it's two (or whatever) against one, and that's how it is with roomates, majority should rule. They may not care if people come to the door, I mean it is girl scout cookie season after all. I probably sound strange, but you can get to know some cool people that way.
Posts: 5362 | Registered: Apr 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Stephan: No Solicitor signs don't work anyways. My parents had its up all 18 years I lived with them. Never stopped a single person coming to the door and asking for money.
Um, how would you know? If it stopped someone from coming to the door, then you would never know about it, because they wouldn't have, you know, come to the door. When I was selling stuff for school I never went to houses that had no solicitor signs up. I doubt the people in those houses had any idea I was respecting their signs, though.
Posts: 4655 | Registered: Jan 2002
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quote:Originally posted by Stephan: No Solicitor signs don't work anyways. My parents had its up all 18 years I lived with them. Never stopped a single person coming to the door and asking for money.
My building has No Solicitor signs, and it didn't stop some of those damn kids from showing up at my door with their spiel about winning points to get $15,000 to start a business by selling magazines. I was really tempted (I was busy working on my entrepreneurship project at the time) to inquire about their business plans and then proceed to pick them apart.
Anyways, I understand roommate frustrations all too well, especially after last semester's four girls in a two bedroom with one bath happy fun time. Which is why I live alone now.
posted
Repeat: "I will not get mad at things that aren't important."
Besides... they are right. You don't have a "right" to put up signs in a living space that is just as much theirs as it is yours. It doesn't matter how much you pay. It only matters that you ALL live there, and thus must ALL agree on what to put there.
Posts: 8120 | Registered: Jul 2000
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You know, Alt, this is going to sound really harsh, but I hope you take it as advice and I wouldn't even bother offering advice to someone I didn't even care about.
Look at your threads on the first page. You are behaving shockingly immature. You want to quit a job without notice and don't care how it reflects on you. You make a purchase then have to ask other people's opinions if it's okay. You also say you'll just retract your purchase if you decide not to make it - retractions are serious business on Ebay and don't reflect well on you. The fact that you would bid with the idea "Oh I'll just retract it if I change my mind" shows another level of disrespect to the seller and immaturity on your part.
You have no right to insist that your roommates put up a sign they don't want to. Not if they pay an equal share of the rent. You're outvoted. Deal with it. Like an adult, if you can. Not by calling them names.
Posts: 14428 | Registered: Aug 2001
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posted
Why should you have the right to put up any sign you want when they don't have the right to NOT have up a sign that they don't want.
If anything, you are the one in the wrong since you are in the minority and are making a big deal of it. When you live with people, you have to work things out with your roomates. You generally have to go with the majority. Its just part of having roommates.
As for calling them nazis, that was way over the line. For many people, that is the most offensive thing you could say to them.
Posts: 1901 | Registered: May 2004
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You need to read about REAL censorship and realize that you using it in this context is childish and inappropriate. And you calling them nazis was obviously incorrect, so you saying it doesn't bother me. But I should expect better, and I think it's telling that I don't.
Posts: 1156 | Registered: Jan 2004
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posted
It's also wrong and pretty ego-centric to post about this on a message board where one of the other parties is a member.
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