posted
Depends on where I am online. Some places, I'm just like my "real" self, and others, not at all.
Posts: 1006 | Registered: Jun 2006
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I would like to say that I disagree with this. I think that the online person is more real than the real person. Even if they are lying, I think that says more about the real person than if they weren't to lie in the real world. We say and do things online that we wouldn't do in real llife, but not because we are putting up a front. Rather, we have very few reasons to put up a front and let our inner selves loose. I am more real here, even if I don't talk or act the same in the real world, because I can be myself without as many social worries. That, I believe, is the same for most people who communicate via Internet.
Really? I feel more socially restricted at Hatrack than in my real life. Mainly because I'm online, my handle can be traced back to my real name (not too paranoid about that, but it's a concern in the back of my mind), and because I strongly disagree with the opinions of many Hatrackers on topics that are important to me. Not that this is a bad thing - it tends to make this forum a great place for rich, meaningful discussions and debates - but I do have to double-check what I say.
Also, since I've committed myself to staying here for a while and would like to be a part of this community, I want to earn and keep the respect of other Hatrackers. When I can't read their emotions through body language and tone of voice, it's hard to tell if I'm doing that. I'm very opinionated and assertive IRL. So posting here is an exercise in conducting a debate with someone I violently disagree with, while avoiding a flame war or unnecessary hurt feelings.
Posts: 1762 | Registered: Apr 2006
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quote:Originally posted by rivka: Not that I know what Dags is actually like in person. *sniffle*
"Shy" was not the first word that came to mind. Nor the 50th.
Rob and Eve were about the best dinner hosts I have ever had the honor from...
The word that comes to mind for that dinner is "elegant". Not in the colloquial sense of "formal" but in the mathematical sense of "beautiful in its simplicity." No attempts to impress, just simple honest fellowship among friends and (if I may so elevate myself) peers. I only wish I had had more time with them. I shall make some in the not too distant future.
Posts: 3846 | Registered: Apr 2004
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posted
I'm more or less the same, but more articulate online where I can type what I have to say and people can't interrupt me in the middle.
Posts: 1751 | Registered: Jun 1999
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posted
I am the same in real life. I am very adaptable to the person I am with, I try to make people feel comfortable, I am a smart-a**, I enjoy a good discussion, but not a confrontational one, and when I reach a certain emotional point I sort of snap, blabber, and eventually sob.
Posts: 10890 | Registered: May 2003
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posted
I'm exactly the same, I think. I feel that interactions online are just the same as in real life, too, and I never feel like internet friends are any different than real life friends, or that internet relationships are different from real life relationships, other than the necessity of long periods physically apart, of course.
Posts: 6246 | Registered: Aug 2004
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posted
I've found that often times, people who online make my blood boil are actually quite nice to be around in person. On the other hand, I have also met people who were very entertaining online, but are boring, annoying, and tiresome in person.
I would guess that everyone behaves somewhat differently online than in person. At least, everyone I know does, to some extent.
Posts: 3950 | Registered: Mar 2006
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posted
I'll say quite honestly that you'll actually get closer to the real me online than you will IRL. I edit myself severely in face-to-face conversations, mainly to keep myself more in the bounds of what I will call The Traditional Male Code. For me, the 'distance' that the net affords is a blessing.
Posts: 3658 | Registered: Jan 2002
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posted
Everything that I am on Hatrack I am in real life, just in different ratios. I don't know how I'm viewed by others, but I FEEL a lot more serious on here than I am in real life. IRL, I'm far more easy going and funny.
Here I feel like I'm 90/10 in my serious debate/funny jokester ratio. Off of here, it's more like 25/75 back the other way.
Also I'm a BIT shy around people I don't know, but mostly I'm just waiting for the right moment to jump into the conversation, provided they aren't discussing college sports or football.
Posts: 21898 | Registered: Nov 2004
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posted
Although I'm generally the same, I feel like I'm generally nicer and friendlier offline. I'm quicker to write people off online because it's easy. I can ignore people on forums by skipping over their posts. In real life, if someone's talking to me, I have to find a way to deal with irritations. This usually means taking the time to find a way to get along regardless of differences.
Even though I smile a lot in real life, I think most of my posts come off as rather cold. I may be saying the same things, but it's lighter in real life.
Posts: 866 | Registered: Aug 2005
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posted
I think I'm basically the same, but I may be too close to the subject to see clearly. Those of you who've met me in person may have a better grasp. Posts: 4077 | Registered: Jun 2003
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quote:"Shy" was not the first word that came to mind. Nor the 50th.
Well, I'm not shy with my friends.
quote:The word that comes to mind for that dinner is "elegant". Not in the colloquial sense of "formal" but in the mathematical sense of "beautiful in its simplicity." No attempts to impress, just simple honest fellowship among friends and (if I may so elevate myself) peers. I only wish I had had more time with them. I shall make some in the not too distant future.
I think you underestimate how much of that is due to the quality of the guest.
Posts: 26071 | Registered: Oct 2003
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posted
It is funny but I think that what you see of me here and on Ornery is who I really am. I tend to just "listen" on Hatrack because much of the discussion tends towards pop culture, or issues that I simply don't follow very closely like movies or current music. In real life if you start talking about this type of stuff, my eyes glaze over and it becomes obvious pretty quickly that I really am not listening too well. I simply don't care about Brittany Spears or whatever happens to be the latest cover-page of People magazine. Mostly however, it is just that I know so little about popular culture that I essentially have nothing to say. People ask who is your favorite actress and I am thinking Greta Garbo or Vivian Lee or some long gone actress instead of the latest starlet that played the blonde bimbo in the latest Hollywood movie. I constantly need to be reminded by my wife who is who in the latest shocking celebrity scandal.
I also tend not to engage much in a large group in real life. I have a huge problem keeping names matched with faces, so often times I need to meet someone several times before it becomes permanently ingrained. Needless to say that is a really embarrassing problem in real life. On Hatrack no one realizes that I even have such a problem. I'm not timid or afraid of large groups of people, it is just that I seldom have anything to say which would be of much interests to anyone else. Unless of course you happen to hit subjects I do know something about.
Bring up Anthropology, history, football, Formula One, or politics and you will wish you hadn't because I'll talk your ear off. But in real life, aside from football, not many people willingly talk about history, anthropology, or even know about Formula One. And politics is simply not polite conversation at a cocktail party.
I think who I am on Hatrack, in real life, and on Ornery are the same person. It hasn't been a deliberate decision to make it that way, but that is how it turned out. In fact in real life, my nickname really was/is Redskull.
Back to lurker mode.
Posts: 110 | Registered: Jan 2001
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posted
I'm the same in real life as I am online. Very random. Only I am quieter in real life, it takes me a long time to open up, but when I do I will rant and rave about Dir en grey until your ears fall off in a loud happy voice.
Posts: 9942 | Registered: Mar 2003
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posted
I think I'm pretty much the same online, but then, I mostly just post at Hatrack-related forums, and I don't feel like I am anonymous in those contexts. A lot of people know my real name--particularly people with joined-dates close to mine--and many details about my life, and I have met many Hatrackers in person. And yet, I feel like I was nicer when I started out at Hatrack. I don't think it's an online/real-life thing, but just a matter of being extra polite when I feel like an outsider, which is a normal tendency of mine anyway.
Posts: 13680 | Registered: Mar 2002
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posted
I agree with you, Ic. I am not as nice of a poster as I used to be. I was just noticing that after I made a not-so-nice one on the other river just a while ago. Posts: 2064 | Registered: Dec 2003
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posted
I used to be nicer in real life. Now I am at least as pleasant online, and trying to be more so, whereas I have given up any attempt to be nice to people in real life. Working in a restaurant for too long tends to make you hate people. Posts: 1364 | Registered: Feb 2003
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quote:And Noemon is the same but even more awesome in person.
I think that's just about the nicest thing anyone can say.
______
I'm the same. I'm smiley, and I have a loose sense of body language that tends to goofy, which portrays a bit of diffidence, or at least takes the edge off of my convictions, but that's just veneer, I'm the same, except with more hair.
Posts: 5600 | Registered: Jul 2001
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posted
well, since i play an MMO, and have quite a few forums i go to i tend to agree with people being different online. I wouldnt think of it necisarily a different personality, just a certain side of me comes out easier online than in real life.
I am much more subdued on the computer and a lot less vulger and more watchful of what i say.
Posts: 467 | Registered: Nov 2005
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posted
maybe not talking on IM's but i was moreso talking about forums. Im's are just like having a conversation on the phone or something... im perfectly normal there.
Posts: 467 | Registered: Nov 2005
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posted
I smile so much that when I don't smile, people ask me what's wrong. As a result people form opinions about me very quickly, and they're usually quite wrong. This is not to say that I am not the smiley person I appear to be, but that people who don't like being friends with Sir SmilesAlot, still end up being friends with me later on when they get to know my dark shadowy interior.
You can tell more about someone by the way other people act around him.
People who are younger than me show me more respect than I deserve. People who are older than me treat me with wariness because I am so comfortable speaking to new people; they often wonder if I have met them before. People my own age at first believe that I am older, then believe that I am smarter, then either get to know me, or mantain these illusions.
Posts: 9912 | Registered: Nov 2005
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thank you, Dag. I especially needed that today... right about now, actually.
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