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» Hatrack River Forum » Active Forums » Books, Films, Food and Culture » JK Rowling drops hints of possible eighth Harry Potter book (Page 2)

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Author Topic: JK Rowling drops hints of possible eighth Harry Potter book
Blayne Bradley
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You know in all honesty I expected Draco and hermiony to hit it off. Glad it didn't happen that way though i felt the Ron/Hermiony angle went a little predictable. I downloaded a pdf of book 7 to avoid spoilers while waiting for my copy to arrive in the mail and it took me a second try to find the correct pdf.

Its amazing how some people can mimic Rowling's style it didn't click that something was wrong 2-3 chapters in.

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Samprimary
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quote:
Originally posted by aspectre:
It's now official: Hermione Granger and the Revolting Potions

Hot damn. She looks pretty good when she's not getting tarted to look like a 15 year old.

She should just fall in love with Radcliffe and get that out of the way for the universe.

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Icarus
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If OSC rewrites them, will Dumbledore be married and have kids?
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Synesthesia
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quote:
Originally posted by Icarus:
If OSC rewrites them, will Dumbledore be married and have kids?

Yes, not only that but he'll take up whole chapters TALKING about the importance of having babies and getting married.
But not in that order.
He'll start off every school year with a speech about that very thing.

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Javert
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I'd prefer Stephen King to rewrite them.

Mr. Weasley's Ford Anglia comes back and starts killing students.

Slytherin's Monster is a clown named Pennywise.

And of course, every student at Hogwarts has some sort of psychic power or 'shining'.

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Icarus
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Terry Goodkind could rewrite them.

Slytherin are progressives who hold constant charity drives. When they're not doing this, they like to brutally rape everyone in sight. Over and over again. In loving detail. Every book culminates in Harry creating a work of art that makes everyone realize just how important their individuality actually is.

Or Robert Jordan could--whoops, guess not.

Too bad. I was looking forward to seeing what Goblet of Fire would be like without Harry making an appearance in it anywhere. Also, Hermione would marry Harry and all of the Weasley boys, and pull on her braid a lot in frustration with them.

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Icarus
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Anne McCaffrey could rewrite them. Then Harry could Time It and rescue his parents.
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Icarus
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George Lucas isn't busy. He could do it.

Turns out that the original division between the houses was caused by a disagreement over the day's lunch menu. Also, magic is caused by parasites.

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Icarus
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Thomas Pynchon could do it. Then we'd have no clue what any of the books were about, but we could read them all in a single day.
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Icarus
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Maybe Nancy Kress would do it.

Turns out "magic" is just a bioengineered trait.

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Icarus
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Kevin J. Anderson could do the rewrites.

Actually, no. He just wants to write sequels about all their kids.

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Icarus
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James Cameron has volunteered to do the rewrites. He says Hogwarts will now be located in the middle of the ocean, and that his rewrites will be the greatest works of literature ever.
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rivka
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quote:
Originally posted by Icarus:
Anne McCaffrey could rewrite them. Then Harry could Time It and rescue his parents.

And there would be a tapestry!

(Also, these are hysterical.)

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Epictetus
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I'd like to see books about the other wizarding schools. Whole new cast of characters, same world.
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Javert
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Maybe a story about the Salem Witches Institute? It'd be nice to see a Potter or Weasley grandchild study abroad in the States.

Of course, being in the states, I am biased.

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The Rabbit
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quote:
Originally posted by Icarus:
George Lucas isn't busy. He could do it.

Turns out that the original division between the houses was caused by a disagreement over the day's lunch menu. Also, magic is caused by parasites.

If Lucas rewrote the books, we'd find out that Voldemort didn't kill Harry's father, he is Harry's father. Hermione and Harry would turn out to be twins separated at birth.

Dumbledore would say things like "Understand love, Voldemort cannot".

Furthermore, we'd find that the reason we never learn anything about Harry's grandparents is that James Potter's (aka Voldemort's) mother was tortured to death by muggles and his father was a magic parasite.

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Dan_raven
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"Would you like Professor Snape
Would you like him in a cape?
Would you like him with a snitch?
On a broom, playing Quiditch?
Would you like him with a snort
Spying on Lord Voldemort?
Would you like him Harry my friend
Would you like him in the end?"

"I will not like Professor Snape
In a dress or in a cape.
I can not, will not Dumbledore
Like Professor Snape, not one dot more."

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Epictetus
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You know, I've decided that George Lucas' style can be effectively described as Wagner-esque. Especially when Darth Vader takes his first steps in Episode III, it was just like watching an Opera...only with immense CG effects.
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jeeshkid
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It would be hard for Rowling to make another book about Harry and his friends after the they all grow up happily ever after and marry their high school sweet-hearts epilogue she put at the end of the seventh book.
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Icarus
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Is James Michener still around?

His version would flesh out all those details we always wished for more of when it came to the magical geography of England. He'd only have to sacrifice the characters to do it.

-o-

Actually, I heard Harper Lee wants to do it. Well, actually, she'd just stop after the first book.

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Dan_raven
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Ooh, I just found in an old trash bin, "Harry Potter and the Deathly Death" by Stephen King:

Harry Potter awoke in the maternity ward. It wasn't the smell of ash and cooked meet wafting into the room that woke him. It was the heavy weight and sense of someone staring at him that popped his eyes open.

Eyes stared back.

Giant, sickly bulbous eyes stared back not three inches from Harry's face.

Panic, a deep rising wave of panic set in, but was quickly dashed as Harry realized to whom those strange eyes belonged.

"Dobbie, what...what's going on."

"Harry Potter is awakes? Good sir. Harry Potter is safe now. Dobbie loves Harry Potter. Makes sure he is safe." Dobbies bright orange hunting cap and blue scarf tickled Harry's nose as he slowly climbed off of Harry's face.

"Dobbie. What happened. The last thing I remember was dancing with Cho at the Yule Ball..."

"Terrible. Terrible things master Harry. Dobbie, sir, does not wish to tell the great Harry Potter what has happened." Dobbie played with the shirt he was wearing as pants.

"What happened. I do not remember."

"It was Moaning Murtle sir. Draco Malfoy invited her to the ball he did. Danced with her, and said she should be crowned queen of the Yule he did."

Harry put on his glasses. "Yeah, I remember seeing her there. I don't remember the details. What happened."

"Oh, Draco did a nasty trick to her, he did. Was making fun of her all night behind her back. Then, he promised her a crown to make her queen of the ball he did, but the crown was jinxed it was. When he put it on her head it weeped sir. Gallons of bloody flowed out of the crown it did, covering Murtle. She did not take it very well I'm afraid."

"What did she do?"

"Oh, The Great Harry Potter knows never to tease a Ghost. They have powerful magic in there own way. She called up ghost chains to lock the doors to the great room, so that none could get away. It was then I knew that the Great Harry Potter needed to get away I did. So I took you, just as the fire started?"

Harry gasped. "Fire!"

Dobbie frowned. "Bad fire sir. Most everyone killed. Professors and students sir, all burned by ghost fire."

Harry could not believe his ears. "All? Didn't anyone get out?"

"Well, sir, Mr. Ron and Ms. Hermione did get away sir. They were outside the room when it was locked. Snogging, they was sir."

"Where are they?" asked Harry. Right now he needed his friends.

"Well, sir, I believe its all Crookshank's doin."

"What was?"

"You know how when that nasty Sirius was chasing that mouse man--Wormtail? You know how he seemed to get away from you that day? He didn't. He turned into a rat as you saw, but those dementors kept you a bit busy. You didn't see Crookshanks chase the mouse, and eat him."

Harry was shocked. Did even Wormtail deserve to be eaten by a cat?

Dobbie continued. "Eating a Wizard, even one who's in the shape of an animal, why it does something to people, and to animals too. Ever since that day Crookshanks has not been right. He's been runnin off into the woods lookin for some hunter to play with. And he found it, he did."

Harry wasn't sure if he could handle any more, but it was too late to stop now. "What did he find?"

"He found the car sir. He found that old wild car in the woods. It was feral now Mr. Harry Potter. It hunted for food, as did Crookshanks. Together they chose the time of the fire to come back. When the fire burst out, why, those not burnt were running around looking to get help. Ron Weasley and Ms. Hermione too. When the car drove up Harry Potter's friends were not sure about getting in. But when the girl saw her cat sitting on the roof, why they thought it was safe."

Harry gulped. "It wasn't, was it."

Dobbie shook his head. "I don't know what happened once they got inside that car, Mr. Harry Potter. Couldn't see much through them dirty windows. Did see some blood though. Heard some screams, even over the sound of the hall burning."

Harry tried to close his eyes, but the image of the car attacking his friends was all the stronger for it.

"Ms. Ginny and Mr. Neville they got out too. At first they tried to get in the car, but when they saw what was going on, they tried to get the others out of it. It is a shame. The car attacked them it did. Crushed them with its mean wheels, the nasty thing."

"Ginny too?" Harry whispered.

"Well, sir, yes. The giant fellow, Hagrid. He came out up from his cabin to help, but he came too late Mr. Harry Potter. Something inside him just broke when he saw the girl and boy's bodies there on the ground. He went to them and tried to hold them. That's when the Ministry folks showed up. They says the giant must a gone mad and killed them all. Poor Hagrid was just too broken to say a word back. They took him to Azkahban. They says they'll give him a kiss there, but he says its too late. He says his souls already gone."

Harry understood what Hagrid meant. He felt as if his soul had also been torn away. Still, if Hagrid or any of there were still alive, Harry Potter was going to help.

"Thank you Dobbie. I'm feeling better now. I am going to...."

"Oh no, Mr. Harry Potter. Its too dangerous out there. You need to stay where its safe. You need to stay here. Hogwartz is closed. Nobody will come here now. Haunted, they say. Nobody will ever come up here again. That means that you are safe Mr. Harry Potter. As long as you stay here, you are safe. Mr. Harry Potter, you are going to stay here."

For the first time Harry noticed that Dobbie was carrying a large sledge hammer. "What's that hammer for Dobbie?" he asked.

Dobbie looked down at Harry's knees. "I'm sorry, Mr. Harry Potter" he said as he raised the hefty sledge. "Truly I am sorry."...

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Puffy Treat
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Wait, the sledge hammer was from Rob Reiner and Andrew Scheinman's retooling of William Goldman's Misery screenplay. King wrote something different in the novel. (It's been a while since I read it, but I think she actually cut off his foot!)

Just sayin'. [Wink]

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kmbboots
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Dan, I enjoyed every bit of that. Thanks!
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plaid
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quote:
Originally posted by Icarus:
If OSC rewrites them, will Dumbledore be married and have kids?

Yep. He'll still be gay, except he won't do anything about that, since he'll be too busy being happy about being married and having kids.
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plaid
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If George R. R. Martin rewrites them, by the end of book 1, Harry will be dead and Hogwarts burned to the ground.
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breyerchic04
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I'm more concerned about JK Rowling rewriting them than anything else.
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MrSquicky
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quote:
Originally posted by plaid:
quote:
Originally posted by Icarus:
If OSC rewrites them, will Dumbledore be married and have kids?

Yep. He'll still be gay, except he won't do anything about that, since he'll be too busy being happy about being married and having kids.
And America will either be a bunch of whiners who deserve the downfall that's coming their way because of their appeasing politics or a great country that has gotten fed up with the world not appreciating their efforts, depending on whether a Democrat or a Republican president is in office. If necessary, this will switch halfway through the series.
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Dan_raven
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OMG--Ayn Rand doing Harry Potter.

"Who is Dobbie Galt?" everyone asked.

Hermione Grainger grumbled. For the fifth straight day the house elves she was liberating had not shown up to clean her simple, economical, politically correct one room flat.

She clambered aboard the Knight Bus, the only socially responsible way to get to her work in the department of Social Services. The driver frowned. At least today she wasn't back-seat driving.

At the ministry she bumped into her old friend, Ginny. Since the end of Voldemort Ginny and Harry were happy in their life.

Then, about three months ago they broke up. Harry stayed home with the kids, but Ginny had disappeared. Now there she stood, in front of the ministry, contemplating the building with a frown.

"Ginny!" Hermione screamed.

Ginny looked up. She had not loved Hermione as much since Hermione had broke up with Ron. She had driven Ron to drink with her causes and social agenda. Poor Ron, raised poor and forced to surrender his earnings to all of Hermione's causes. Finally, when she used his Butterbeer money for a Werewolf Rehabilitation Center, Ron had had enough. He left her that day and took up living, apparently happily, with a Vela half his age.

But Ginny understood now. Her smile was forced.

"Ginny" Hermione screamed again. "What a pleasure. What brings you here?"

Ginny smiled back. "What a perfect witness" she thought. "Hermione" she said. "Long time no see."

"Where have you been?" asked Hermione. "What happened between you and Harry."

"Oh, you'll love this." said Ginny, snaring Hermione with her love for gossip. "After we were married Harry seemed content to live off his money and his fame. I wanted to do something, create something, be something. The children were fine, and seeing them off to Hogwartz was wonderful, but I wanted to do something more.'

"That's when I met Dobbie Galt. He was the house elf. Every day he did things. He created things. He got things done. We wizards just lived off their hard work. It was like you were saying, except..."

Hermione was proud that her views of Elf rights fit with Ginny's experiences. The "except" however, was irritating. "Except what."

Ginny smiled. "Except they don't want to be freed, or to be given our charity. They work because the work itself is ennobling. They work for the pure honor and joy of doing and creating. Your attempts at stripping them of this by pitying them and looking down on them has infuriated more than a few." ..... 100 pages of Philosophical ranting ..... "

Hermione shook her head. "Who fed you this garbage."

"Their leader, my leader. Dobbie Galt, House Elf and truth speaker. He was able to fix up my new house, then he fixed up my head, then, last night, he fixed up my body. He forced himself on me and it was wonderful." Hermione cringed at that image (and face it, we all do).

"So, um, what are you doing here?" Hermione asked, trying hard to get the image of Elf love out of her head.

"The ministry, and all the wizards and witches, need to start over. That's why I'm here. I'm the only one with a wand and with their power coursing through me, the only one that could do this--Avada Boomada."

With a wave of her wand the Ministry of Magic collapsed downward in upon itself. A new order, a just order, had been brought to being, and Hermione Granger, fighter for Elvish rights, feinted at its beginning.

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the_Somalian
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quote:
Originally posted by Alcon:
No. Do not want. Not unless they get her an editor and stat. Books 5 through 7 were such amazing let downs that I really don't want an 8th. And I kinda want them to go back and edit the ever lovin' crap out of the back half of the series. Maybe include 4 in it too. Her edited books are amazing, she has a talent for plot, her world is wonderful and her style -- once shortened and cleaned up -- is a blast. But once the editors stopped trying her books went hard core down hill. The plot became messy with unnecessary turns, her style became slow and bogged down and the world became harder to get lost in.

But I guess there isn't much chance of her being edited more in the future... unless her fame dies down or people start to actually read her books more closely. Oh well.

Thank you for this post.

Rowling forgot that less is more, and the installments after book 3 are considerably inferior because the needlessly bloated length attenuates the charm/excitement. I was considerably disappointed with "Goblet of Fire" because of this.

The only way I could get through book 5 was through audio CD, and I won't even bother with the rest.

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Lanfear
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These books aren't going to be literary classics. Comparing them to LOTR is a joke.
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Blayne Bradley
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And yet they will be remembered for all time.
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Synesthesia
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I don't care what anyone thinks.
I think they are fantastic books. Very enjoyable and just plan good.

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Puffy Treat
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quote:
Originally posted by the_Somalian:


Rowling forgot that less is more

Partial disagreement. I saw it as Rowling realized at some point during the writing of book three that the series didn't have to be an endless P.L. Travers/Roald Dahl riff. Suddenly, her own voice came out, loud and clear. The massive increase in pages sprung from her desire to explore where -her- imagination was taking her. I found it so much more interesting and enjoyable than what came before. [Smile]
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Synesthesia
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I liked the extra pagage.
It kept a person occupied while waiting for the next book to come out.
Plus carring it is good excercise.

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Shanna
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I have a love/hate relationship with the longer books in the series.

But its more based on the fear that she was allowed too much freedom in the later volumes. Sort of like what happened with George Lucas and Stars Wars. Great imagination but certainly needed to be wrangled. I'm concerned that once Rowling became such a HUGE name that the editors and publishers stopped being so critical.

I've heard that the first book was heavily edited to keep it at a kid-friendly length. Its sad to think what might have been left out, but I think it benefits from having a tighter focus.

I enjoy the last two books in the series but I've read each only once or twice while I will re-read any of the first five at the drop of a hat. I know some people have complaints about GoF and OoTP, but I think the length and plot of those books reflect Harry's advancing age and involvement in the magical community. But that balance seems thrown off in the last two. We see more the magical world outside of Harry's little bubble and maybe I'm just disappointed that they weren't more interesting.

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SenojRetep
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I heard Terry Brooks was going to do the rewrite. He's leaving everything exactly the same, with the exception of the titles to which he will append "of Shannara."
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Szymon
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quote:
Originally posted by Sterling:
<shrug> I've liked them all; the early ones are just different from the later ones. The only one I mild-to-moderately disliked was "Harry is a teenager, it's time for him to start screaming at everyone" book 5.

I absolutely and completly agree. I didnt like this "snogging" thing as well. But the book is great, so is the idea.
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Epictetus
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Joss Whedon should rewrite the whole series as a seven season TV show.
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Carrie
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Of which part of one will air, and that out of order.
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katharina
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The Chanel with Hermione thing? Just a rumor. Not true.

---

quote:
If George R. R. Martin rewrites them, by the end of book 1, Harry will be dead and Hogwarts burned to the ground.
*laughs bitterly*

I still don't think I've quite recovered from Martin's books.

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Noemon
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quote:
Originally posted by plaid:
If George R. R. Martin rewrites them, by the end of book 1, Harry will be dead and Hogwarts burned to the ground.

True. In addition, Order of the Phoenix would be coming out "real soon, now".
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Dan_raven
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Marvel Comics is going to write them.

They will, of course, be retconned now, and every 2-4 years, in order to be more relevant, destroy the mythology already established, and basically rake in cash.

Changes include--

Dumbledore will now be bald and in a wheelchair.

Prof. McGonagle (sorry for the spelling) will drop 40 years, develop into d-cups, and have a penchant for wearing fishnet stockings and form fitting outfits. Since she is a strict disciplinarian, these will always be black and she will always have a whip in her hands.

Snape--since many in the target audience have issues with greasy hair, a change of his look is mandated--he will now always wear an odd looking helmet.

While there will be no Hogwartz uniform, there will be "house" uniforms. Griffindor will be tight jeans and tight t-shirts. Slytherin will be Slutty DuJour. Hufflepuff will be Catholic School Uniform--2 sizes too small for the girls. Ravenclaw will be Goth, because face it, Goth is a viable and under-served market.

Muggles will develop super robots who's sole purpose is to destroy Wizards and Witches.

Wizarding Robes will be replaced with spandex and capes.

Stan Lee will get a cameo--which is hard to do in a book.

Voldemort will be...well, he's a petty, revenge obsessed villian already. Good Marvel Villian.

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