Feedback on the first thirteen, and interested readers would be appreciated. Here we go:

Pam stared at the tiny vial; thankful for the small size that shielded her eyes form the intensity of the turquoise liquid, shocked at the credits she was handing over for such a minute amount. The other vials had been almost twice the size.

“Here. No one can see you with this. And they will kill you if you are caught with it. Understand?” The man’s foul breath wafted over Pam and she resisted the urge to shirk away.

If she's in a dark, creepy alley somewhere buying from a dealer, then consider telling us fairly quickly, especially if "the man with foul breath" is indeed a shady fellow.

And, yeah, that first sentence is huge and might be better served broken up. If you decide to keep it, though, consider moving the semicolon after "liquid" and using a comma where the original semicolon is. That would be more correct usage within your sentence; the semicolon can serve as a replacement for a conjunction (like in this sentence). I admit I'm a semicolon purist...

Overall, good potential hook and a possibility for conflict, which is always nice.