“Death Waits in the Dark.” Isa read the words to himself as he studied the patch on the pilot’s jacket. Hardly a word had been spoken between the two since they took off in the sleek Little Bird. The MH-6 Little Bird didn’t appear very fearsome to the untrained observer. In fact, with its bubble nose front and small size, it didn’t look much different than the kind of helicopters used by air traffic reporters in the States. On top of that this Little Bird had been stripped of most of its weaponry to allow for a greater traveling distance. But after cruising at 175 miles per hour at ten feet above the desert sand it had accomplished its mission flawlessly. Now the time for action was very near. “Ok soldier,” barked the pilot, “we’ll be at the border in five clicks.” Isa nodded, reached

[This message has been edited by tgeorge33 (edited December 17, 2005).]

[This message has been edited by tgeorge33 (edited December 17, 2005).]

[This message has been edited by tgeorge33 (edited December 17, 2005).]

Toward the end you use pilot and Captain interchangeably and this makes it more difficult to follow since these are brand new characters... for a second I thought the soldier was Captain Warren.

Also, you mention that the helicopter is cruising at 175 mph and 10 ft but then in the dialogue "...in five clicks" Klicks (actually with a k) is slang for kilometers and to keep a consistent POV I would not mix the measurements. Minor point.

The other thing that I missed is that the helicopter is described as not looking fearsome... but it "still accomplished its mission." I don't follow that. Maybe it didn't look stealthy or fast and still finished the mission, but unless there was some hostile action unknown to the reader I cannot put the two together.