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Miss Laurie takes care of me. She takes care of other kids too… lots of them. But she’s not my mom. I lived with dad until the police came and took me to live with Miss Laurie and her big family. I thought I would go back to my dad… But the judge wouldn’t let me. Miss Laurie took me to see him for a visit. I don’t know why I got so mad! When I saw him I started yelling. I said, “I’m so mad! I’m so mad at you!” I folded my arms and wouldn’t talk to him any more. When we got back to Miss Laurie’s house I was still upset. “I want to go home!” I told her. I went to my bed and hid my face from everybody. The next week the visit was great! Dad gave me a rocking horse that he made out of wood. It was a foot tall and rocked back and forth. We played with it until our time was
[This message has been edited by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (edited July 21, 2010).]
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I apologize for not noticing earlier that you were writing children's books - we don't get that much around here.
I am curious if you have foster children. I myself do not, but I have worked with children in this situation many times. I feel this must be written more for children in "normalized" households instead of the ones actually in foster care. I don't know if I would want to get into the whole legal aspect of this situation - it might suggest that the police can come and take any child away from his/her family. Children go into foster care for many reasons, and you probably should not stereotype this in a story - some children will expect every foster child or his/her parents to have done something wrong.
Ultimately, a social worker will be the new family's only government contact regarding this child, so you may wish to start there. The "Dad" part is a little iffy - many times children are not allowed contact or only supervised contact with birth parents.
You should probably shorten the paragraphs for a children's book. Also, if this is directed toward the foster children it will probably lose them quickly - for most of these kids, the verbage will be somewhat foreign to them.
I would really need to know who the intended audience is and where this story is going to give you a suitable critique.
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It's a typical picture book in one sense--it's for kids ages 4-8. More specifically I see this as a tool: Counselors and foster parents could use this story to help foster children work through difficult feelings regarding their birth parents; although I would like the story to have a broader appeal as well. There are over 500,000 children in foster care throughout the US, and their stories should be told to a general readership.
My wife and I have had 18 foster kids.
[This message has been edited by Zack Zyder (edited July 22, 2010).]
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[Revision] Miss Laurie takes care of me. She takes care of other kids too… lots of them. But she’s not my mom. I lived with Dad, until the police came and took me to live with Miss Laurie and her big family. I thought my dad would come back and get me. But he didn’t. Instead, Miss Laurie took me to see him for a visit. I don’t know why I got so mad! When I saw him I started yelling. I said, “I’m so mad at you! I hate you!” I folded my arms and wouldn’t talk to him any more. When we got back to Miss Laurie’s house I was still upset. “I want to go home!” I sobbed. Posts: 31 | Registered: Jul 2010
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I confess I had to look them up myself. I was trying to get a better feel for how they layout. So I could then I get a better understanding of your first 13.
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I will take a look at it if you would like to send it to me. I have taught and worked with that age group (with both special education and behavioral modification), and my son is in third grade.
I will not be able to look at it until some time next week - I am going out of town over the weekend.
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