posted
OK, I'll start by just stating my major mistake and then I'll tell the story. I ditched my date on her senior prom night and made out with another girl in the middle of the dance floor.
Ok, with that out of the way, I'll tell the whole story.
So I went and picked up my date (Sarah). we took some pictures at her place and then went and met the rest of the group at the Irish lion. we all ate and then went to Aimee's place to play cards and hang out till prom started. Well Rainelle's parents (this is where the trouble started) called her cell phone to check up on her, so, she lied and then decided that she had better get to prom fast, just incase her psycho parents decided to check up on her, so I took her to school to wait for the rest and look like she never was at Aimee's. So, as some of you know, I have a crush on Rainelle, well she was looking really hot in her dress, so I started to hit on her, and she started flirting back, this lasted for about 30 minutes while we waited on everybody else. So, Sarah and the rest arrive and I go back to being her date, and trying to ignore Rainelle (who was playing footsy every chance she got), and after a while of Rainelle obviously being bored, Sarah made me go dance with Rainelle (in my defense I did argue against it because I knew what was going to happen.) Rainelle and I went up and danced for about a minute before she just started making out with me (she started it not me, I was going to try and get her out of plain view first.) So there we are, in the middle of every one making out on the dance floor. Well Sarah came up to check on us when this happened. needless to say, she was pissed, but she didn't do anything. so then everyone decided to go ahead and come back to my place for our post prom party, so every one came back here. Rainelle wasn't allowed to be here, so we left almost immediately to take her home, and well lets just say it took my 45 minutes to run Rainelle the 4 miles down the road to her house. So I get back to my house and receive the cold shoulder from almost everyone.
Now I feel terrible, I ruined Sarah's senior prom. I mean she claims that she wasn't very surprised and that she had fun anyways, but still, I ditched her on her senior prom.
Ok, people there it is, tell me how terrible I am, because I deserve it.
Posts: 1094 | Registered: Mar 2004
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posted
Ouch. That's pretty rough. Reminds me of the time I came back to my high school to go to my x-girlfriends senior prom and she ended up ditching me for a 98 pound choir tenor. It still hurts.
Oh well. It was kind of a bad move but if sarah was only a friend... well hey, hopefully you can move past it and no big loss.
Posts: 1294 | Registered: Oct 2003
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posted
Well, if it makes you feel any worse, JT, my prom date did the same thing to me, and she's a really terrible person who later gained about eighty pounds and gave birth to demon spawn. So you've got a bright future to look forward to.
[ May 24, 2004, 08:46 PM: Message edited by: A Rat Named Dog ]
Posts: 1907 | Registered: Feb 2000
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(only j/k) - that is awkward - I'm assuming from Sarah's actions/ reactions you did go as just friends though. Maybe you can think of something to do for her to say sorry - I know flowers sound lame but it always makes me feel good - but as a friend you'd probably know what she'd like.
Posts: 394 | Registered: Feb 2004
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posted
Stryker, we need pictures of Rainelle, in order to see who's to blame
Now seriously, if what you say is correct, Sarah was the one pushing you into the devil's arms (well, being serious didn't last very long...) So, rationaly, she should not be mad at you for what happened. Unfortunately (or fortunately), humans are not rational beings, at least not entirely. So afterwards she was probably a little bit jealous and frustrated by the fact that she didn't get to have a real date and you did.
Anyway, stop feeling terrible. Not worth it. Life is beautiful. And it goes on.
posted
It's probably best if I, um, don't respond to the contents of your post. I'll just post anyway, because I feel I should, and so you can see that I read it!
What you did to that poor girl just plain sucks, Tyler. I imagine you hurt her pretty badly and I hope you feel proud of yourself. There is no "redo" for a senior prom. Those are the memories she is going to have for the rest of her life, memories of her horny date ditching her for another.
Posts: 2064 | Registered: Dec 2003
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Everyone else, I didn't realize how into him she had been that night, and knowing how incredibly good girl, doesn't want to upset her parents, I didn't expect anything like that to happen. I was upset for a while about that, but am over it now. There is something else he has said today that has made me very mad and I want to either cry or hit him. Let's just say he has made many of my close friends not believe something I said, and now they are losing trust in me. But I am sick of high school drama so I am not worrying about it.
At least I don't have to go back in the fall, he does. And maybe he will get mono. But no I really am not that mad at him.
Posts: 5362 | Registered: Apr 2004
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Stryker, I'm sorry to have to say something like this, especially in a public forum, it's really not my style, but I'm going to agree with you and tell you you're a terrible person. I am pretty open-minded, and can accept most things, but when I found out about this on saturday (especially with the conversation that you and I had had before prom), I was about ready to go and kill you myself. I can only imagine how Sarah was feeling.
I'm sure it'll pass, and everyone will forgive each other... but it was a dirty, low-down thing to do, and I'm feeling quite disgusted with you, to be quite honest. You didn't even have the decency to apologize, while Rainelle felt awful and told Sarah about 50 million times that she was sorry, you had a smug grin on your face, and even asked Rainelle out (or as good as) in Sarah's presence. Pardon me if I don't devote my utter sympathies to your present situation.
[/RANT]
(edit: Hehe Corwin, yes, I decided not to be lame and give up...)
posted
Not being an American - I obviously don't get the seriousness of the whole prom night thing but come on - give the guy a break - if she carries this around with her the rest of her life and it affects her so badly she'll have had a pretty shallow life.
I'm sure it'll just become a comment she pulls out when everyone's discussing the topic of proms:
"Well my prom date made out with another girl in the middle of the dance floor."
*elicits cries of shock, horror and much commiseration*
Tyler - you've just set her up with a talking point for the rest of her life.
Posts: 394 | Registered: Feb 2004
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posted
Yeah, I agree with Valentine. You really screwed up, and I'm not sure why you're posting about it here. Almost seems a little boastful, like "look at me! look what I did! tell me I suck!"
I'm not seeing the regret and remorse. You seem pretty shallow.
Posts: 2220 | Registered: Jun 1999
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posted
breyerchic04, you're Sarah ?!? Should have thought about it, I thought he just changed his date in the meantime. Boy, do I feel stupid now !
Yay for not being mad at him, though !
quote: Let's just say he has made many of my close friends not believe something I said, and now they are losing trust in me.
Now, THAT sucks. I don't know what it is, or why do your friends believe him and not you, but that's something you two have to work on. And then Stryker can go back at being "stupid" again. There's another prom next year, who knows what can happen then ?! Posts: 4519 | Registered: Sep 2003
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posted
Oh boy, it's getting hot in here... I just wonder how much more is it to this story ?!? Anyway, Sarah, now you REALLY have something to talk about ! Maybe the prom didn't turn out to be as cool as you'd have wanted it to be, but you must admit, the after-prom is really something !
quote: A question JT - you seeing Rainelle again - if so it was probably worth the hassle.
cochick, I like your practical attitude And I'm not American either, so I don't quite see what the fuss is all about... It's not a wedding, people ! Sheesh...
Raia, maybe you'd have better restrained yourself... I wonder where Stryker is. Probably lurking and thinking about how stupid it was of him... to start this thread !
I really have to stop posting now. It's 1:40AM, the fatigue is getting to me... Peace to all of you
posted
You mean, get it out in the "thousands of people all over the world" open? For the 3 people who are actually involved in this??
Posts: 2220 | Registered: Jun 1999
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posted
I'm with Ayelar on this one. And Corwin, that's probably true, but I'm seething... I couldn't just keep quiet.
Not to mention his hitting on every girl (other than Mary Ellis, who would flatten him) at his after-party... and grinning while telling the rest of us what was involved in the trip to take Rainelle home. *shudder*
Posts: 7877 | Registered: Feb 2003
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posted
Yeah, that's low. And that's coming from ME, the queen of accidentally stepping on toes over cute guys who are flirting with me. The least you could've done would be to say something outright to Sarah. Or you know, save the face-sucking for some post-prom date.
And yeah, prom IS important. I couldn't get a date to my senior prom, but at least I had fun my junior year. It should be a good high school memory. I'ma agree with Valentine.
Posts: 9057 | Registered: Nov 2000
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posted
Stryker...I did almost the same thing. I went to prom with a "good friend", Todd, but knew the whole time I wanted to be with Josh. I didn't actually make out with him there, but much drama was going on with the two of us right under Todd's nose, and the rest of the night between Todd and I was strained at the least. I guess the reason I'm telling my sad story is to let you know that you aren't the only high school aged person who has done something that might not be your shining moment. High school has a way of working out a persons values, and I gather that this isn't the kind of behavior you plan on continuing.
I also agree with cochick, if she does let this haunt her forever and ever, I tend to think that she might have more to worry about than a bad prom.
Next time, I'd try to be a little savvier in these situations...it could save you and everyone a lot of grief...not to mention wasted breath on the gossip I'm sure comes along with all of this. Posts: 25 | Registered: May 2004
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posted
Not classy. Couldn't you have waited till after prom to make out for Sarah's sake? Have some self control chit'lins! (That goes for Rainelle also, of course.)
Posts: 7050 | Registered: Feb 2004
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quote: Rainelle and I went up and danced for about a minute before she just started making out with me (she started it not me, I was going to try and get her out of plain view first.)
This, I think, angered me the most out of the entire thing, because I know you, and I know Rainelle. I'm not going to go into full detail, but your methods of trying to fob the blame off on someone else I find sickening... not to mention the fact that you admit to wanting to start making out with her, only you were going to wait, and "try and get her out of plain view first." How thoughtful of you. Really, my compliments on your decency. [/SARCASM]
Posts: 7877 | Registered: Feb 2003
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posted
If you haven't guessed from my previous post, I'm pretty disgusted with JT's behavior. Eventually, JT, I hope you grow up and realize there's a lot more to life than what you happen to want at any given moment. The choices you make really affect other people, whether you think they "should" or not.
Yeah, technically, if you go to a prom with someone "as a friend" then you could interpret that to mean that romantic relationships with other people during that prom might not be out of the question. Technically, there's also no law against cheating on your wife, either.
When you're out on a date with one girl, it doesn't matter if you consider her "just a friend" or not. You're still out with her. And it shows an unbelievable level of disrespect and disregard for her feelings if you go and find another girl to make out with during that date.
I mean, look at you. You're a teenager. You've got all the time in the world ahead of you, and you think you have to make out with Rainelle THAT NIGHT? The ONLY time when it would cause MAXIMUM pain to Sarah? What in the hell is wrong with you?
This kind of thing has happened to me multiple times, and I can attest to the way it feels. I read someone dismissing this because it's a prom, not a wedding, so it's not a big deal. Like saying it's a broken bone, not a bullet through the head, so it shouldn't hurt. I promise you, incidents like this may not be worst thing in the whole world, but they can add up to make someone feel pretty worthless. Maybe the victim in this case can be gracious and forgiving and not be angry at you. But it's hard to get this kind of experience out of your head when it comes to assessing your own confidence and self-worth.
JT, you didn't go to the prom with Sarah "as a friend". No one would treat a "friend" the way you treated her.
Thanks to Valentine and Raia for breaking the ice so I could say my peace
[ May 24, 2004, 08:51 PM: Message edited by: A Rat Named Dog ]
Posts: 1907 | Registered: Feb 2000
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posted
And again, both by his actions and by posting about it here, Stryker has proved himself to be boorish. I understand that to a degree high school is all about the drama, but really I don't understand why the two of you (and the rest of your friends) continue to have anything to do with him. This seems like a lovely time for a shunning... and like you said, neither of you are coming back next year, and Raia at least is leaving the country pretty soon. Consider cutting the ties now, and spend the rest of your Senior year around people who don't make you want to kill them.
Edit: Ooooh, well said, Dog. Sorry I had to follow you!
posted
Yeah, seriously, JT. What you did to Sarah amounts to humiliation and disrespect. So you try to atone for it by posting the story in a public forum? In what way does this lessen the humiliation for Sarah? This sounds to me a lot more like the storytelling of a licentious braggart than a true humble apology.
Posts: 1907 | Registered: Feb 2000
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posted
Funny thing though, Geoff..I didn't see him apologize here and Sarah didn't mention that he did either.
Posts: 2064 | Registered: Dec 2003
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posted
Hey, Valentine, that's true. JT's post actually reminds me of all the "Are you mad at me?" speeches made by Hayden Christensen in Shattered Glass. He didn't actually feel the slightest remorse. He just feared reproach, and thought that looking contrite would get him out of trouble.
JT, that's how you look right now. If I were you, I'd spend less time trying to talk your way out of trouble with us, and work on changing your outlook on life and your treatment of your "friends". You're not going to convince anyone you're truly sorry and deserve forgiveness overnight. But maybe you can learn to avoid pulling this kind of crap in the future.
[ May 24, 2004, 08:43 PM: Message edited by: A Rat Named Dog ]
Posts: 1907 | Registered: Feb 2000
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posted
He didn't at his party afterwards, either... Rainelle did, about ten million times, but Tyler seemed somehow to think that he was justified... at least, he had no qualms about telling everyone. And that certainly includes Sarah.
(edit: I meant that he didn't apologize, I was responding to Val's post)
posted
Here's the deal, Stryker: you don't kiss and tell. You ESPECIALLY don't kiss the wrong person and tell.
So while I don't think you're up for a good shunning, you should expect to do some MAJOR fetching, carrying, and kowtowing for the next few months before the people affected will smile at you again.
Posts: 37449 | Registered: May 1999
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posted
*I didn't have a date for prom so i may be one-sided on this i also didn't read his last post so that plays a factor here too*
JT- Stuff happens, if this was just a one shot deal with the chick you took, you both knew the risk going into it, you made your play and you got the other chick. don't waste time, if prom was where it was gonna happen oh well. I wish ya both the best, and this may be rather mean...but it obviously wasn't meant to be with the other girl if you make out with someone else so just let it go, it'll do ya no good to think about it and judge yourself. if she has issues, thats what counseling is for.
Posts: 46 | Registered: Mar 2003
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posted
caliburn, that's disgusting. So what you're saying is, when you do something seriously hurtful to a close friend, you should forget about it and blow them off, and if they have a problem with that, they should get counseling?
What kind of solipsist paradise do you live in?
Posts: 1907 | Registered: Feb 2000
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posted
Dag, I think that the idea of "class" may be totally lost on the mainstream culture of the current high school generation. Realize that a lot of these kids are looking at their values through the MTV version of reality. In that version of the world, "class" is just something to be ditched.
Posts: 1907 | Registered: Feb 2000
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posted
I must say Sarah has shown a lot of backbone to stay as calm and detached from this as she has.
Tyler - putting this thread out here when you know that Sarah and other friends also frequent the same site probably wasn't the smartest thing you've ever done. I assumed you were looking for advice on how to remedy the situation with her. I stand by my first post. Especially if you haven't apologised to her.
I also however think that some of the other comments are beginning to go over the top now. Most of you have agreed that he was wrong to bring it up here and I'm sure he realises it now.
Posts: 394 | Registered: Feb 2004
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posted
Sarah has been very cool about this. Kudos to you, Sarah. And beyond this, JT did something *more* to hurt you? Not apologizing and then doing something to hurt your credibility? JT, you have some serious groveling to do. I hereby declare you are Sarah's personal slave till she releases you. :nod:
Posts: 7050 | Registered: Feb 2004
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posted
He hasn't deleted the thread because he left just after his first post.
Thanks to everyone who has said anything nice about either of us, because I still feel that stryker is a relatively nice person, who is stuck in middle school.
He is my slave until I leave the state in the middle of june. Rainelle can just join the used by tyler club with me.
quote: Sarah has been very cool about this. Kudos to you, Sarah. And beyond this, JT did something *more* to hurt you? Not apologizing and then doing something to hurt your credibility? JT, you have some serious groveling to do. I hereby declare you are Sarah's personal slave till she releases you. :nod:
I second the motion. This is low. This is one of those things you remember for a long time.
Posts: 4089 | Registered: Apr 2003
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I back Geoff and Niki and etceteras. While your story's fairly tame in comparison to some of my friends' histories, this little anecdote's just ridiculously pathetic. Whitewashed suburban boy, you take a woman out, you treat her right -- if there's any justice in the world, you'll be left at the altar and get to read her public brag of the experience the day after.
Sometimes I despair for my generation even more than I despair for the rest of America.
Posts: 3293 | Registered: Jul 2002
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(well, being serious didn't last very long...) So, rationaly, she should not be mad at you for what happened. Unfortunately (or fortunately), humans are not rational beings, at least not entirely. So afterwards she was probably a little bit jealous and frustrated by the fact that she didn't get to have a real date and you did. ![[Dont Know]](graemlins/dontknow.gif)
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