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Yes, that's what school is, a garden in which young minds are groan. And since our President is so intent on the left behinds of children, I think we should make puns about education. Elizabeth asked for it, but I deduce that many people want it -- it's elementary.
Chalk one up for teachers!
Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000
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I think someone needs a conjugate visit. I guess that sentence was too long. Run on, now. Maybe we need a plan to shorten it -- a lessen plan, perhaps?
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My friend Tory used to raise clams, but she quit. She gave me the ones she didn;t sell, and I have one left. It is the Ex-clam o' Tory.
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"You can lead a horticulture but you can't make her think." -Dorothy Parker (sorta education related...and a classic...do they still teach horticulture? I would hope they wouldn't leaf that behind...)
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I had a childhood friend that loved to have iced tea with sugar. I would go over to play with him and his mother always made us take a break and drink some tea. Bobby, my friend, had to always sit in a specific chair. One time I went there and at tea time he threw a fit. He was being loud and obnoxious and rowdy. His unruly behaviour was due to having to sit in a different chair. His normal chair was being repaired and you know how children act up when faced with a substitute tea chair.
Posts: 2022 | Registered: Mar 2004
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I love the story my wife tells of a young student by the name of Lin. Lin suffered from a hyperactivity disorder and Cheri (My wife)was constantly petitioning his parents to have him evaluated and perhaps medicated. His parents finally relented in their objections and took him to a specialist who supposedly did prescribe something. What makes this story interesting is that the prescription only intensified the young man's frenetic behaviour. Eventually his parents enrolled him in a special needs institution. My wife's comment was, "Thank God we're Ridda Lin."
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Ah, derral like that in school these days. I have my brother Ed Plan whenever I need accomodations, even when Ma doesn't want me too. He tells her, "Ma, de vacations are necessary for her." He is so very Special, Ed is.
Posts: 10890 | Registered: May 2003
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I know that your last post was by way of a joke, punwit, but I take issue with it on two counts.
One: no teacher has any business suggesting/requesting/demanding that any student be put on medication. Evaluation by a psychiatric professional is a perfectly reasonable suggestion (and in some circumstances, perhaps it even needs to be insisted upon); but let's leave the prescribing to those with M.D.s, neh?
Two: as both a teacher and a parent, I flinch at the notion that a teacher's primary/only response to a student being removed from her class is relief at their absence.
*shrug* I am very aware that I am over-sensitive in the extreme on this topic, and perhaps I am overreacting. If so, I apologize.
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Rivka, I should have included a disclaimer. I understand your feelings and can say unequivocally that my wife has never uttered such a statement.
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When I was in college, I was a bit taken aback by the clothes -- or lack of same -- some of my fellow students came to class in. Clearly, many were hoping the professor graded on a curve.
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There was a really annoying kid in my class who would always get to school very early to take the best seat by leaving a note on it. The problem was he used a tiny sheet of paper wo write the not, so no one could read the desk claimer's small print.
Posts: 26071 | Registered: Oct 2003
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My gardening friend came up with a brown corn which he named Corn L. He went to yale for that, since it was illegal to harvard tufts that appeared to be of the columbian version.
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He was going to prince tons of the stuff, but wouldn’t you know, he just had to stan ford with his discovery. By dart mouth of word, the police found out. In the future, I believe he will canvassar his prospective clients less radcliffely.
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I can never decide which kind of berry I like best. Strawberr, raspberry, or blueberry? I guess I will have to go with the Middlebury.
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Did you guys hear about the school built at the top of the really steep hill? Alot of kids never got in because they couldn't make the grade.
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In Highschool I really enjoyed Pistachio's in the shells. Heck, I was voted "Most Likely to Suck Seeds".
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I was the person known most for my various email chatgroups. The award was for most IM proved.
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The kids in the highest math group always controlled the playground equipment, mainly because they knew how to use the slide rules to their advantage.
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When I was in school we had one track and field competition against an unknown opponent. It was the mystery meet.
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The kids in the rocket club were always picked on worse than anyone - even the kindergartners would steal their launch money.
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I guess I just went ballistic and engaged in hyperbolic arguments. Just remember, to the vector go the spirals.
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We had two guys in our class that were considered for the graduation night speech. Val and Ian shared top grades. I wasn't enamored of Val. In fact many people didn't care for him. Everyone knew he would have a good shot at top honors so people referred to him as Val a dick. The school administrators had a tough call; Val a dick or Ian.
Posts: 2022 | Registered: Mar 2004
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In my high school one older student would dress up like he had just snuck across the Mexican border and try to sell crushed oak leaves to the new kids to smoke.
Picture the scene, with the older kid in the center of a group of conspiratorial new kids.
The bravest of the new ones would say, "Is it Freshman?"
"See, Senior." he would respond in a bad Mexican accent. "The hard stuff is fine, but the soft is better. Then again, the Sophmore money."
The kid would turn to his girlfriend, "Junior in for half, OK?"
Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002
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I went to this institution where "school spirit" was mandatory. Which was odd because the buildings were all a bunch of canvas huts. When they told me "some assembly required," I knew I was in for an in tents learning experience.
Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000
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Did you hear about the new school for future doctors and nurses? They were instantly admitted into the I.V. league.
<okay, I was going to go for the joke about the syllabus for the first day of class: I.V. covered, but I thought that was in the wrong vein.>
Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000
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Recently, I went to a sushi bar. They had some stray Unagi on sale so I sat down and picked one out. A full meter long it was. A buddy of mine saw me across the room and yelled, "Hey, what gad you ate". I showed him my plate. "Wow", he exclaimed, "that was a metric eel you ate".
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Do you know why they are called Graduated Cylinders? Because the ones that failed or dropped out no longer hold water.
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