posted
Oh, I don't know, I think there are plenty of people who would decide whether to even open a thread or not depending on who started it. I suspect that if people saw a long-ish post by someone they weren't familiar with, they might be more tempted to skip it.
the most important thing in any thread though is to get the first post on a new page. That ALWAYS gets attention.
posted
I think Dr Strangelove's post indicates how this treatment of newbies is generally a state of mind--on their part.
In my experience--at least in the Other Side of the Hatrack River; ironically enough, I don't notice it so much on this, the allegedly "safer" side--newbies get welcomed unless their first splash is to tell us all how dumb we are or how unwelcoming we are. I certainly felt welcomed when I was a newbie, and I make a point of welcoming people I see who are new--especially on their first posts, if I happen to see them.
The fact is, it actually works the other way around. When people see a friendly, well-spoken newbie, they get excited about a new voice joining the conversation. When people have been around for a while, they have friends, but they get less attention paid to them as people tend to assume they know what these people have to say, and people respond to your posts on a superficial level, as if they had merely skimmed them. (Which can lead to misunderstandings.)
For myself, I know I was much more "popular" when I was down around, and slightly below, a thousand posts. Everybody who stays around long enough to be prolific goes through their point when they're the "flavor of the month," and then everyone just kind of shoeboxes them. Tom's the liberal who goads OSC. Let's see everything he says in just that vein. Bob is the funny guy. Dag is the legal guy. Tres/Xap is the guy who likes to argue philosophy. Tatiana is the one who always stands up for the perceived downtrodden. Jon Boy is the language geek. Belle is the southern Christian. etc etc. And it gets to the point where when these people post, the response is to their perceived "content" rather than what they actually said.
So enjoy this period of time when you are relatively unknown.
posted
I think Icarus is a big ol' attention whore, a Disney fanatic, and an anti-Castro Cuban, and I see every post he makes in that light.
In fact, this statement:
quote:So enjoy this period of time when you are relatively unknown.
was clearly an attempt to get the US to break off relations with Cuba and return all the seized property to its former owners, followed by building an amusement park and putting Icarus' name up in lights.
There, I said it.
And I almost always read Dr. Strangelove's posts because I think the screenname is so great.
I never skip a post by Tom because if I do, I won't know what the latest s-storm is all about. He's trouble with a capital T and that rhymes with P and that stands for Pool!
I read Dag's posts because I'm studying for the LCAT.
I read Tres' posts because it's a lot easier to misunderstand philosophy in small bites than as a result of reading it myself in exhaustive detail.
Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000
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posted
Also, I'm ignoring Storm Saxon. Mainly because we call it "the fast lane" not "the passing lane," but also because if I get stuck behind him in traffic, I'd have to kill him. Or, at the very least, shake my tiny fist at him in mock rage!
Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000
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quote:what I didn't like about Ornery was the behavior of a minority of members who, because of long tenure there, were valued by the community and had obviously earned a bit of "slack" from everyone with regard to their occassional abrasiveness.
This problem here on Hatrack has never ceased to bother me. I hoped that it would, but it never has.
Posts: 16551 | Registered: Feb 2003
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posted
well, maybe if you weren't such a newbie...
Actually, I believe that this kind of thing DOES go on here, and I don't know if it really is "bad" so much as it is a natural outcome of people building relationships. I mean, I've known some of the people here over 5 years and they know me (more or less). If I'm cranky one day, they aren't going to just break off relationships because of it. Someone coming into that kind of situation infrequently or as a complete neophyte is going to feel like an outsider and, if they said the same sort of thing would probably be struck by the reaction they got versus the one that, say, I got.
Not sure how to change it, but acknowledging that it DOES happen is not a bad thing to do either.
Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000
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posted
That, and maybe they remember your previous posts and know that you aren't always like that/this is a touchy subject for you/you're generally a good person and maybe had a lapse. Doesn't mean you won't get chastised for it, but it might be more gentle.
Best way to remedy this problem if you feel you're on the wrong end of it is to post more and make more friends. Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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quote: Don't let something silly like a post count stop you.
It's not so much the post count as the fact that.. you still feel a newb. Like there's something you've missed and don't want to make a fool of yourself by posting something someone others've said a million times before. Or even something that's completely off topic. I know that's definately not what the atmosphere's supposed to bo, but sometime's it's like being in a bad dream, the kind where you're naked in front of people you respect and wish would respect you.
Back on the original topic, I think that most of the so-called name calling is a result of misunderstanding. If you read further after the name calling there's usually an apology and no one leaves with hard feelings. Which is something you'll never find at ornery because everything is so closely knit. Which, again, might be a reason you think it's less respectful. Because, in a way, it can be. It's somewhat about knowing who you can and can't kid around with. In RL I know who I can joke with, but here I'm not yet sure of the bounds, so I refrain from it. You can kid with your mom, but maybe not with her friends, because you don't know each other yet. Here you can work on meeting these people, but at Ornery it seems like everyone has walls up, no one wants to let people close.
But then again I could be completely wrong. I'm still a newbie. Posts: 1215 | Registered: Apr 2005
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quote: Best way to remedy this problem if you feel you're on the wrong end of it is to post more and make more friends.
I find that interacting more and making more friends is in fact an excellent solution to MOST of life's problems.
--------
quote: In RL I know who I can joke with, but here I'm not yet sure of the bounds, so I refrain from it.
This, by the way, is excellently responsible of you, and I applaud you for it. Of course, the mere fact that you've had this thought means you're probably already good to go. *grin*
Posts: 37449 | Registered: May 1999
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posted
"Back on the original topic, I think that most of the so-called name calling is a result of misunderstanding. If you read further after the name calling there's usually an apology and no one leaves with hard feelings. Which is something you'll never find at ornery because everything is so closely knit."
Given the number of times I've apologized on ornery, I resent this remark Posts: 4112 | Registered: May 2001
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posted
Our standard greeting these days, over at ornery, for new posters is "Welcome to Ornery. You are wrong." Doesn't matter what the person has posted, or in what context. Thats our greeting. And we sortof like it.
I don't know how many bad seeds have transferred from ornery to hatrack, because I don't follow here as closely as I follow there, but several of our truly awful posters originated on hatrack. So the flow goes both ways. Some of those people were jerks here on hatrack, and some, in part I think because of threads like this, felt that they could go over to ornery and let the abrasiveness really fly. I don't think we appreciate that anymore then you guys appreciate it here, although we have different standards for what is considered unduly abrasive on ornery then what is considered unduly abrasive here. Which isn't surpising, given the nature of the two forums, and the nature of the communities. Hatrack is a dinner party. Ornery is the smoke filled room AFTER the dinner party.
Posts: 4112 | Registered: May 2001
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posted
I feel as if I should clarify (though in reality this is yet another shameless post intent on running up my post count. hehe). I don't feel excluded. Its much like aiua said. And also Icarus. It's my perception of some threads as being a gathering of old friends which I am reluctant to break in upon because I'm not quite sure how I'll be recieved. It is an unfounded reluctance, which is not based on anything particularly I've observed here or in the least based on anything anyone has said, but there it is. In fact, I would go so far as to say the opposite. Everywhere I've posted I've felt welcome and unintrusive. However, the feeling of reluctance, and, dare I say it, for me personally a feeling of inferiority, persists.
So, if I am to attempt to achieve some semblance of a point to this post, I want to make it clear that in my experience on Hatrack, I have never felt frowned upon by anyone, or excluded by anyone, except perhaps myself. The reluctance I feel is a result of some innate cautionary instinct which is afraid of being rejected by people I truly enjoy and in most cases respect. Hatrack has done nothing to feed that fear of rejection. It has served only to alleviate it. And yes, I agree, the only way to be rid of it is to post more and make more friends, which I certainly hope to do. And finally, in a perhaps vain attempt at bringing this post all the way back to the original topic, I would like to applaud the Hatrack community for making itself a welcoming environment. While I am in no position to speak as I have only briefly visited Ornery once, I would think it a completely idiotic (infer what you will) idea to attempt to bring its standards over here.
And that is all I have to say, since it is getting late and I feel as though I am rambling. By the way, I absolutely love this thread.
Posts: 2827 | Registered: Jul 2005
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Tom, you do realize that I was specifically pointing out simplistic generalizations, right?
-o-
quote:I think Icarus is a big ol' attention whore, a Disney fanatic, and an anti-Castro Cuban, and I see every post he makes in that light.
'Tis true. But you forgot to mention that I do community theatre and am constantly trying to get on the TV show Who Wants to be a Millionaire? (The restraining order hasn't slowed me down.)
Posts: 13680 | Registered: Mar 2002
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posted
Besides, Icky, I figured people would just disbelieve me and think it was all exageration if I told the whole truth.
The sad fact is that he's been hit with restraining orders from the regular TV version of Millionaire and the MGM-Disney-Studios version of it at Walt Disney World.
And he's got an enabler for a spouse! Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000
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But as long as we're being kinder and gentler, I'll just settle for a mild chest cold on your garden shed.
Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000
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quote:Originally posted by aiua: Like there's something you've missed and don't want to make a fool of yourself by posting something someone others've said a million times before.
Believe me, it's all been posted one million times before. One more time won't kill anyone. Except maybe for Dead_Horse.
posted
*refrains from taking the thread in a naughty direction by the slimmest bit of self-restraint*
Posts: 13123 | Registered: Feb 2002
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