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» Hatrack River Forum » Active Forums » Books, Films, Food and Culture » SWF seeks Thread (Page 2)

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porcelain girl
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quote:
Originally posted by TomDavidson:
quote:
But I am also obviously available.
I suspect that dating success in L.A. might depend heavily on your definition of "obviously" and your definition of "available."
Mmm, not so sure about that. By obviously available in response to the catcalls issue I just meant that I look 20-26, and do not wear any rings. And am not holding hands with a man-person.

You might be surprised on what dating success depends on in Los Angeles. I personally suspect it has a lot to do with dollar bills, anorexia, and voodoo.

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Stray
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quote:
Originally posted by kmbboots:


To answer the original question, my romantic life is usually non-existant but sporadically fabulous.


That pretty much describes mine right now too, at least for the past couple months. I look forward to several days of fabulous over Thanksgiving weekend [Wink]
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El JT de Spang
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Isn't L.A. pretty much the most superficial place in the known galaxy?
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kmbboots
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That may be why the occasional native will seek out middle-aged, sofa-cushion-shaped, Midwestern women.
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Squish
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Not a huge fan of the place. I personally think L.A. is the reason that one of my high school friends turned into one of those 'OMG, I'm SO hot' chicks.

The last time I went to L.A., I couldn't go a block without annoying cat calls from a passing car or someone following me down the block, pestering me for a number. Silly thing was, I was the one in a tank top and jeans and not in the fancy shmancy designer clothes. I suppose people try more if they think you're more within reach. I'm also 23, but could pass for 17. Maybe it's the high school crowd that does the yelling rather than approaching?

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ElJay
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quote:
Originally posted by Mike:
quote:
Originally posted by ElJay:
If I was single and lived in one of the relevant cities, I would so do this: Crazy Blind Date.

I just signed up for this last night! [Smile] No dates so far, though.
Oh, excellent! Please start a thread about it after you start going on dates and let us know how it goes! I think it sounds so awesome. . .
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Ivygirl1937
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quote:
Originally posted by Tstorm:
Six times can't be the charm, either. That aspect of my life is on perpetual 'hold', due in part to geographical and demographical handicaps.

(I live in a small town in northern Kansas.)

That is so not an excuse, since I only live BY a small town (pop. 500), not even IN the town itself. Of course, I started going to college in a slightly larger town, but not by much. It's not THAT hard to find someone...especially since Kansas girls are the greatest. [Razz]

I'm currently single as well, but that is by choice. That, and I frighten and intimidate guys. [Big Grin]

Ivy

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pH
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quote:
Originally posted by ElJay:
quote:
Originally posted by Mike:
quote:
Originally posted by ElJay:
If I was single and lived in one of the relevant cities, I would so do this: Crazy Blind Date.

I just signed up for this last night! [Smile] No dates so far, though.
Oh, excellent! Please start a thread about it after you start going on dates and let us know how it goes! I think it sounds so awesome. . .
I totally wish I could do that. Bah!

-pH

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The Flying Dracula Hair
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I'm in LA, and as far as I can tell, the dating situation isn't all that abnormal. Of course, I've always lived here so if it's more difficult than other places I wouldn't know.
But I'm in a solid geeky and loving, though maybe bizarre, relationship and know plenty of other non-superfish people who are as well.

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Farmgirl
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quote:
non-superfish people
Only Mermaids and Merman for us, baby!
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ketchupqueen
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quote:
Originally posted by erosomniac:
Cat calls are so rarely about being interested in a woman that I doubt they were trying to hit on you so much as make you uncomfortable, kqueen. [Frown]

Oh, I know that. Which is why I don't include cat calls in "flirting." They're just harassment.

I really could care less what some guys in a car think of my butt, though. I might care more if I was single, I suppose. But I don't think so...

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ketchupqueen
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quote:
Originally posted by brojack17:
quote:
Originally posted by ketchupqueen:
Heh. I do NOT appreciate the cat calls. Especially when I'm visibly pregnant and pushing my two children in a double stroller. Dude, do you not GET that I'm unavailable?

Pregnant and pushing a double stoller fulfills a fantasy for someone somewhere.
Yeah, my husband. [Wink]
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ketchupqueen
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quote:
Originally posted by porcelain girl:

You might be surprised on what dating success depends on in Los Angeles. I personally suspect it has a lot to do with dollar bills, anorexia, and voodoo.

You forgot designer clothes and possible plastic surgery. [Wink]

No, really, I do know some people I would classify as having "dating success"-- but most people either a) aren't up for the amount of putting yourself out there that seems to be required or b) don't have time for it. Sometimes it seems to me that dating in L.A. is either a full-time job or something that happens completely by chance.

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MightyCow
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I think one of the really positive things about online dating sites is that in big cities, there are tons of available people who will never meet each other, but might be really compatible and live relatively close. The internet can have its uses.
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The Flying Dracula Hair
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quote:
Originally posted by Farmgirl:
quote:
non-superfish people
Only Mermaids and Merman for us, baby!
Myah!


I agree MightyCow, but at the same time I think a lot of those available people don't meet because of various reasons that'd make them incompatible in the first place, and the internet sort of cheats them together.
But before the relationship I'm in now, the best experience I had was with someone I met on MySpace.

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pH
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I met Michael on Myspace...

Fortunately, that has not soured me to meeting people on Myspace or the Internet. Because I have met some really cool people through Myspace and the Internet. And gotten cool jobs. Also, I use my Myspace to promote my company's shows. [Smile]

-pH

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The Pixiest
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How can you like Javert???

Eponine was always my favorite. Unrequited love digs a giant hole in my heart every time.

...

How is it you het girls aren't swimming in men? I was never looking for one and I found them anyway. It was always the bi/lesbian women I couldn't catch. (You know, the ones I was actually LOOKING for.)

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ketchupqueen
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I met my husband through the internet-- but he lived 1500 miles away!
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Mike
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quote:
Originally posted by ElJay:
quote:
Originally posted by Mike:
quote:
Originally posted by ElJay:
If I was single and lived in one of the relevant cities, I would so do this: Crazy Blind Date.

I just signed up for this last night! [Smile] No dates so far, though.
Oh, excellent! Please start a thread about it after you start going on dates and let us know how it goes! I think it sounds so awesome. . .
A whole new thread? Hmm...

It might just work, though: I may have a date this Saturday! I think this website might just be a brilliant idea. We shall see.

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Javert Hugo
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quote:
How can you like Javert???

Eponine was always my favorite. Unrequited love digs a giant hole in my heart every time.

Eponine I identified with before, but...long term, she was kind of a fool. Torturing yourself over someone who was in love with someone else and never looked at you? Maybe that's just my line - I've done lots of unrequited self-torture (no more, though) but I never did over someone who was attached to someone else.

Javert tried to be good, thought he was good, meant to be good, and he wasn't. He was good intentions that became twisted by pride. He had enough insight to recognize when his view of the world was shattered rather than rationalize it off, but not enough courage to face that whole new world. Incredibly complex, very human...fabulous character. I love him. Plus, he has a better song than Eponine. [Razz]

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The Pixiest
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Eponine loved Marius long before Cosette trotted onto the scene. Love makes a fool of us all. Long term, short term. Doesn't matter.

Both "A little fall of rain" and "On my own" trump "Stars" as far as great songs go =P

I've seen too far too many people, even in this day and age, pave their road to hell with good intentioned harassment of other people to have one whit of sympathy for Javert. The man valued "The Law" over "The Good". His twisted sense of morality caused no end of heartache to those he hounded. At least he had the courage to off himself. "That's why I say 'Hey man nice jump.'"

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Puffy Treat
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I'd offer comments, sis...but the last true romantic feelings I had were in 2004. The person eloped with someone else, so I never revealed them. [Razz]
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Javert Hugo
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Sure. But that's what she was - yearning for Marius. All her motivations were centered on this guy.

I get that love makes fools of us all. I don't get that love makes shells of us all. Javert had dimensions - Eponine was a bundle of need for Marius. She was defined by his denial of her. Ultimately, she wasn't deep enough for me to love.

Sure, Javert had good intentions. That's what I think is universal - EVERYONE thinks they are the good guy. Both sides of just about every war thinks they have God on their side. You listen to opponents complain about the other side and their complaints sound identical. Javert thought he is and tried to be, and he had the rare flash of realization that he wasn't. Both he and ValJean were staggered and changed by mercy, but they handled it differently. That gives Javert depth.

It isn't so much "Good intentions send you to hell" as much as "Even those dancing merrily down to hell have good intentions."

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TheGrimace
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I've always felt bad about this, but I'm always rather annoyed by Marius and Cosette, not so much because they're bad characters (though the quickness of their "love" is annoying to me) but because they just seem so much less interesting/engaging than the rest. Kinda like if they were off in their own musical I'd probably like them just fine, but they're so outdone by Javert, ValJean and Eponine that I dislike them (though Empty Chairs is potentially my favorite song from the musical atm...) <huge huge huge Les Mis fan [Smile] >

as for the original discussion: Porcelain Girl, I feel your pain. Since moving out here I've had next to no love life. Largely through my own fault cause I'm just generally interested in things that are less than likely to get me out meeting people, but a lot of it also seems to be the nature of the LA social life.

i.e. when I do get out to the bars and/or beach it seems like most of the people out there are the plastic people (potentially nice to look at, but not necessarily more than that) and those that aren't are hard to pick out.

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The Pixiest
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Javert: Maybe that's why I identify with her so much. My own youth was defined by unrequited love. I was consumed with it and convinced that I would ultimately die alone. This was a major theme in my teen and adult life until my early 30s. Eponine's death in Marius's arms... with him letting her know that, in his own way, he loved her too.. That was a mercy. One I wasn't afforded.

Javert's life of being a busy body didn't seem deep at me at all. Realizing he was wrong after being granted mercy by the person he persecuted is as profound as a child pulling his hand away from a burning stove. Offing himself was the best thing he ever did.

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TheGrimace
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I definately think that Eponine is more easily relatable (who hasn't felt unrequited love to at least some extent). However, even though Javert is a bit too extreme in his zealousness for the law to really like, you gotta respect the struggle he's dealing with. I mean, chasing down a man who has repeatedly broke the law is presumably a good thing, even though the obsession to which he clung to that task was over the top. Additionally, you could even argue that there was a greater moral reason that he was trying to serve in making an example of ValJean. While we get to see clearly that he's not a bad guy, the public connotations would play differently. I mean, the newspaper heading would read something like "repeat offender felon aprehended after 20 year manhunt" it would probably help impress upon potential criminals how serious the law was (and thus better society). but it's the "classic" dilemma of a Lawful Good character being forced to choose between the Law and the Good.
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Tstorm
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Ivygirl - Ok, so maybe living in a small town isn't a perfect excuse, but it's still a darn good one.

[Smile]

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Javert
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...I love it that this thread has suddenly turned into defending and attacking me. [Wink]
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Wowbagger the Infinitely Prolonged
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It's strange, after a couple years of nothing the proverbial flood gates have opened. I had a bitter break up a few years ago and since then I thrown myself into my work. Really just so I could keep telling myself I don't have time do date due to work.

So yeah about 3 months ago I let it be known to a few of my female friends that I was rejoining the Philly dating scene. Almost over night I had dates for every day I had off for the next month. I found one girl of the bunch that I'm quite smitten with and we've gone out on several dates since. Even knowing that some of my female friends are still trying to hook me p with their friends.

Either I'm super hot and I didn't know it or the Philly dating scene is the complete opposite of the dating scene I had to endure while in the Air Force. With a ratio of something like 10 guys to every girl...it was slightly hard to date. Every girl who wanted a boyfriend had one.

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porcelain girl
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quote:
Originally posted by Javert:
...I love it that this thread has suddenly turned into defending and attacking me. [Wink]

Welcome to the club.
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