Try not to stress too much. I'm not sure what state you're in, but many states have good pregnancy medicaid programs. If that doesn't work, there are tons of free/low cost clinics for prenatal care - I hear they're a pain because you wait forever, but they do exist! Also, alot of hospitals will give you a big discount if you pay upfront before the baby is born, so if nothing else works out start calling around!
Also, alot of kids are born at times that are "not the best". Even though I was trying to get pregnant with my son, it didn't take me long to realize I'd picked an EXTREMELY bad time! It was my first year of teaching, I was making almost nothing, my (now ex) was out of work, and my step-daughter had just had a tumor removed, had major medical bills, and still needed tons of therapy! Inopportune didn't even begin to describe it, but somehow life went on.
Now he's 5, and there isn't a day in the world when I wish he wasn't here - even on the days when I think I want to skin him alive!
Posts: 1321 | Registered: Jun 2006
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Congratulations, BB and Mrs. BB. I know an unexpected pregnancy can be hard to come to terms with while you're worrying about how things are going to work out (I've been there!) But they will work out. They will. And when things start to fall into place much of the anxiety will fade. (The medical coverage was a big one for me too.)
And e-mail me if you need a car seat, or any advice about it.
Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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quote:Originally posted by ketchupqueen: Congratulations, BB and Mrs. BB. I know an unexpected pregnancy can be hard to come to terms with while you're worrying about how things are going to work out (I've been there!) But they will work out. They will. And when things start to fall into place much of the anxiety will fade. (The medical coverage was a big one for me too.)
And e-mail me if you need a car seat, or any advice about it.
Ha! I may take you up on that. Do you have extra car seats? Or did you mean you know a fantastic place to get em?
Posts: 14316 | Registered: Jul 2005
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I didn't really expect this, thought it would be someone older
But yes, definite congratulations are in order.
Thanks. I'll be 28 when the 小輩比 makes his/her appearance. Which reminds me, I need to decide if I'm going to give them Chinese names in addition to their English ones. Hmmmm!
Posts: 14316 | Registered: Jul 2005
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Well, you do have a middle name to work with too. I guess it would just be 1/3 rather than 2/3.
Posts: 7593 | Registered: Sep 2006
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You know, you can even assign multiple middle names, but then one of them has to be a Catholic saint (or Jesus).
Posts: 37449 | Registered: May 1999
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quote:Originally posted by TomDavidson: You know, you can even assign multiple middle names, but then one of them has to be a Catholic saint (or Jesus).
quote:Originally posted by TomDavidson: You know, you can even assign multiple middle names, but then one of them has to be a Catholic saint (or Jesus).
*checks nephews' middle names* *re-checks*
Nope.
Your nephews are BlackBlade's kids?
Posts: 4287 | Registered: Mar 2005
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My daughter has an English name as the first name and her middle name is Chinese (and I use the first syllable of that when I refer to her online). It works pretty well, except that she does not look the least bit Chinese and so people often look confused at the middle name. And to make it worse, she has decided the Chinese name is her preferred name. When people call her by her English names, she says no, I'm Bin Bin!!! At school, at tumbling, at church, everywhere, she goes by the Chinese name. Which was not what we were prepared for. So, if you give your child a chinese name, be sure you are ok with them going by it.
Posts: 2223 | Registered: Mar 2008
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quote:Originally posted by scifibum: Your nephews are BlackBlade's kids?
My nephews have middle names that do not follow Tom's theory.
But he wasn't saying what your nephews' middle names had to be.
(I realize this is probably not that funny, but I thought maybe since you responded to a joke as if it was a serious assertion, it'd be funny to be hyper literal about the whole thing.)
*pounds last scrap of funny until it stops wriggling*
Posts: 4287 | Registered: Mar 2005
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quote:Originally posted by ketchupqueen: Congratulations, BB and Mrs. BB. I know an unexpected pregnancy can be hard to come to terms with while you're worrying about how things are going to work out (I've been there!) But they will work out. They will. And when things start to fall into place much of the anxiety will fade. (The medical coverage was a big one for me too.)
And e-mail me if you need a car seat, or any advice about it.
Ha! I may take you up on that. Do you have extra car seats? Or did you mean you know a fantastic place to get em?
Well, a little of both. But, you probably wouldn't be able to use what I have, and it would be a pain to ship to you.
I do have resources in your area to get you a car seat if you can't afford one, though. Let me know if you need help with that. And I am happy to go through the basics, dos/don'ts of buying, and shopping resources to help you get the best deal if you can afford one.
Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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Congrats! You'll also want to look into WIC - it'll provide free/healthy food while your wife is pregnant and while you have an infant which will put a few more dollars back in your pocket.
RE: Medicare, I've got a sister-in-law that has had a couple children on Medicare and is currently pregnant again. If you need any info from someone who's experienced working with Medicare in Utah, let me know. As I understand it they do a "snapshot" of your income at the time you apply and then it sticks for the rest of the pregnancy regardless of what happens with your income level so if you don't quite qualify for Medicare you may be able to reduce your hours to temporarily lower your income to the qualification level.
Posts: 3275 | Registered: May 2007
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Medicaid is what will cover a pregnancy, not Medicare, and yes, you only have to qualify once during a pregnancy. (Qualifying income is higher for pregnant woment and children than the general population.) You'll have to re-qualify (or qualify for CHIP) if you want the baby to continue coverage after 1 year of age, though.
Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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*giggles* I have a feeling that pregnancy and childbirth may not be covered benefits under Medicare. (Well, maybe for the disabled. Take that back.)
Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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I got my* AARP card while I was pregnant with Charles. I was going to ask the L&D nurses if they had an AARP discount, but I forgot.
*technically it's a spouse card, as Bob is 13 years older than I am. And they send them out early, he didn't actually turn 50 until after Charles was born.
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I don't think Hei Dao (BlackBlade) or Hei Jian (BlackSword) work well as middle names. But 岳黑刀 actually sounds kinda cool. For those wondering how to pronounce it, say the words literally how they would be read normally.
quote:Originally posted by Uprooted: So, how's Mrs. BB feeling?
I felt like an evil task master making her leave the house and go to work today. Her morning sickness isn't the worst I've seen, but it's definitely there. She also gets alot of cramps and hot flashes. The other girls at work hate her for running the ceiling fan.
There was one day I couldn't pick her up from work and she had to walk home, she ended up vomiting twice on the 45 minute walk back and people driving by in cars jeered at her.
But besides that, she's very excited and doing lots of reading up on baby stuff. It's hard for her to adjust her diet so suddenly but she's letting me boss her around on that too.
I'll try to have her post her thoughts in this thread sometime today. Maybe if she posts once it'll be like drugs and she'll stick around to post more on hatrack.
Posts: 14316 | Registered: Jul 2005
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I didn't really expect this, thought it would be someone older
But yes, definite congratulations are in order.
Thanks. I'll be 28 when the 小輩比 makes his/her appearance. Which reminds me, I need to decide if I'm going to give them Chinese names in addition to their English ones. Hmmmm!
I thought you were white- is your wife Chinese, and are you still living in Asia?
I have always been a fan of choosing the Chinese name first, then finding a sound-alike analog in the Anglophone vocabulary. For instance, Jing-mei becomes Jill. A few of my Korean friends in college just took the middle road and used the first letter sound of their names and used those as monickers, ie: Tae-hun becomes "T," or "Tee."
I'm not a fan of the totally unrelated and overly 1950's Asian people names that are totally different from the Chinese name, which is why all Asian female friends in college (school was half Asian) were named Carol, Megan, or Jenny.
One cool way to go would be to pick a Chinese name first, then take the literal translation and try to find a European language analog name. I have had fun doing this with my own name in different countries I've visited, since my name is from Welsh Gaelic, and has a literal meaning in English ("gray" or "sacred").
I think the best way is just to find an elegant solution, with some name that can be applied in either sinophone or anglophone situations. There are plenty of Chinese names that Americans are now pretty familiar with, and which are not very foreign, or you could just hybridize a Chinese name for American purposes.
Posts: 9912 | Registered: Nov 2005
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Orincoro: We're both white, but I grew up in Asia, and I got a Chinese name when I started taking Chinese classes in elementary school.
---- Turns out we make too much money to qualify for medicade. I guess the cutoff income is $2,030 a month between me and my wife. We probably make closer to $2,500, which is really frustrating. We could probably still qualify for CHIP but that's for children not for unborn babies so I've got to look at other options. Darn darn darn...
Posts: 14316 | Registered: Jul 2005
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Move to Texas. Our income eligibility is 185% of the poverty line, so you would qualify for medicaid here. Also, keep in mind that you only have to have your income qualify for one month of the pregnancy. So if you work hourly and drop a bunch of those hours so that your pay for your sample month is below, you can qualify and stay on until the baby is born, after which the baby will be able to qualify for Chip. Also, I believe WIC is 185% as well, so you might as well get that- free milk is good.
Posts: 2223 | Registered: Mar 2008
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The disabled get medicaid too - not medicare (or at least the ones who qualify for SSI do).
Medicaid is a funky system, but if you have to work it, go ahead and do so! I had to with my son for a while when my ex left. I could get insurance through my dad, but my son would have been uninsured since my ex wouldn't keep up his insurance. I was subbing at the time, but technically that didn't count as income against medicaid because it wasn't "guaranteed and regular income". So, technically, if you're working for a company that only promises you a certain number of hours, any overtime you work doesn't count against you for medicaid.
Also, I sort of cheated when his 6 month renewal came up. I'd just found a permanent job (but one that didn't offer benefits) but wasn't due to start it until the next week. So, technically, when I filled out the second set of paperwork, I was still unemployed. Yeah, it's a cheat, but I've paid taxes my entire working life and I needed it at that point, so I don't feel bad about it!
I'm not sure what you and Mrs. BB do. However, if there's any way you could get by without one of your incomes for a month, having her quit might not be such a bad idea if you think she can find another job again after that. Of course, if she's making decent money it might not be economically feasible to do that.
The cut off for WIC income is actually quite a bit higher than the medicaid income cut off - so apply for that right away! They've added some additional language in there about being "nutritionally at risk" but I'm pretty sure that a pregnant woman without insurance won't be hard pressed to prove she is. WIC doesn't provide a large variety of food, but every penny you can save for diapers and baby clothes is well worth it! Besides, if you end up having to formula feed (or choosing to formula feed) WIC can be a God sent!
I'm not sure where you live, but look around for community resources and don't be ashamed to use them when/if you find them. Good Luck!
Posts: 1321 | Registered: Jun 2006
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Did you go in and speak to a caseworker? Usually pregnant women qualify at the same, higher income level as babies under a year. If not, there may be a low-cost state insurance plan (we have one in CA, not sure about UT) for those who are uninsured but don't qualify for Medicaid-- and the caseworker would be able to refer you. I'll do some searching later if you want.
Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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Hmmm. Looks like you're right on the income limits-- but there may be other options. They give a number to call for information on other programs you may qualify for: 1-800-826-9662
Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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So we had the 20 week ultrasound yesterday, and it turns out our baby has man parts. Top marks on the tri-screen test, no holes in the heart or spine that could be seen. We managed to enroll in medicade, so we are doing OK financially as far as the baby is concerned.
Tiffany is over the morning sickness, and feeling really good these days. There's so many things going on in our lives frankly it's scary. We've got another doctor's appointment today with her nurse midwife, (The clinic she wants to deliver at doesn't do the ultrasounds) and she hopes it will be more of the same of what was discussed yesterday.
We've started talking about circumcision, I'll probably ask her to read one of the threads here, as that really helped me to realize there are considerations that should be headed. I myself am circumcised, and Tiffany by default, was planning on circumcision, but now we aren't so sure.
But fortunately we can scratch girl's names for now, and start thinking about boys. I feel fairly strongly that we want to have a German middle name, if not a first name, as that is Tiffany's heritage, (she's slightly more than half German) but out of all those German names out there, the only one she likes is Tristan. I know it's ridiculously early to be settling on names as the boy may pop out, and defy all our ideas.
I'm also leery of naming my children with names that start with the letter T, as my name is Taylor, Mrs. BB is Tiffany. No offense to people who like systems like that, but it just doesn't settle in the right place for me. But time may bear me out to be a liar.
In anycase, I'm thrilled it's a boy, of course I would have been just as thrilled with a girl. Half of Tiffany's pregnancy is over and that's pretty awesome, she's done great so far.
Posts: 14316 | Registered: Jul 2005
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Congrats. If you're looking at the middle name, then having it start with a T shouldn't be a problem, no?
Posts: 9866 | Registered: Apr 2002
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quote:Originally posted by Mucus: What is your name? My name is James Tiberius Kirk!
You might find it interesting that when I told my father his response was, "So this is the "precious heir," (he said it in Chinese) that carries the family name. We better give him a girls name when he's born so death can't find him, and then when he's two years of age we will give him his true name."
Apparently the latter superstition is still current in Japan as well.
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Too old fashioned for my parents though, although they did do that thing where they present the kid with various items and what the kid takes is supposed to mean something about their future.
Posts: 7593 | Registered: Sep 2006
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My husband had a baby name, which they still call him a variant of, but they did give him his legal name at birth.
For my daughter's name, I think us giving her a Chinese name (selected by the fortune teller) was more then they expected. Of course, they are constantly shocked at my willingness to go along with Chinese traditions. Which is why my Chinese in laws love me.
Posts: 2223 | Registered: Mar 2008
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I have a chinese middle name but no one could ever tell me what it was supposed to mean, including my father.
Posts: 11017 | Registered: Apr 2003
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