Here is the first 13.

quote:

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The lift pitched and lurched on its way up the long shaft causing my stomach to tighten. A cold wind whistled through the many gaps between the wood planks that made up the rickety car.

“We should get ready, Leigh,” Mom said over the din of the other passengers.

I nodded and began pulling additional clothes from my pack. They were older and more tattered than what I already wore but would provide and extra layer of protection against the sub-zero temperatures and deadly wind above.

“Goggle’s on,” the operator called out.

I fished my goggles from my pack and wiped the ultraviolet lens before pulling them over my eyes. The heavy cloth shawl I wrapped around my head smelled of mildew and old mushrooms.

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quote:

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A cold wind whistled through the many gaps between the wood planks that made up the rickety car.

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Happy to read after the weekend.

Thanks for reading.

A cold wind whistled through the many gaps between the wood planks that made up the rickety car.
Agree with Tiergan about this one. I am definitely interested by now, good scene setting.

“We should get ready, Leigh,” Mom said over the din of the other passengers.
Would he be able to hear the cold wind over this din? I feel like the fact that there are a bunch of loud people in the lift was withheld, as I pictured a quiet, creepy ride.

I nodded and began pulling additional clothes from my pack. They were older and more tattered than what I already wore but would provide and extra layer of protection against the sub-zero temperatures and deadly wind above.

“Goggle’s on,” the operator called out.

I fished my goggles from my pack and wiped the ultraviolet lens before pulling them over my eyes. The heavy cloth shawl I wrapped around my head smelled of mildew and old mushrooms.

Other than those minor nits, I am definitely intrigued. I will read. Send it on.