posted
Hey there everyone. I finally have a computer again, yay!!! My friend Robert came over and fixed it. The first problem was that my boss didn't screw down the video card, and it was all wobbly and loose and falling out. Then we just erased my old OS and reinstalled XP over it- I had Windows 2000 Professional. It was that easy. And my boss, the self acclaimed "Computer genius" thought that the computer was simply done for. Thank goodness for friends like Robert.
The job is going wonderfully. I started out at like 13 hours a week, went up to 16 hours a week, and now, as of Tuesday, I will have 12 hours this week- only till tuesday, when I get my schedule for the rest of the week and get many more hours this week- and it's steadily rising. I love it. The work is never boring- there is alllllways something to do. The people are nice. My boss is intimidating but nice. Funny thing is, she is never there. I have talked to her once since I was hired... and that was for about 30 seconds on the phone when she called for another employee. Hehe. But I love it. Free sandwiches, hip hip! Heh.
For those of you who were not already aware, Emp and I are no longer together. We are still friends, but I am now with a guy named Danny.... dannyXcore here on Hatrack. He has been my best friend for about two years now. He's a wonderful guy.
Trying to sell my horse is very stressful. I have a friend who has been in horses all her life who is willing to help me... if I give her commission. But we won't be making a profit on the horse, and the money will go toward college... so that was depressing.
Other than that, life is going well. I am now fairly familiar with my therapist, she is really nice... She wants to do a guided imagery with me, and that should be coming up fairly soon. I have been depressed at times lately, but seemingly for no reason. We'll get to the bottom of it though, I know we will.
I am driven on, however, by the thought of moving out after high school. I know it is cliche of me to say that I am leaving right after I graduate, but this time it is true. I am. I talked about it with my mom. She is okay with the fact that I will be moving out when I am 17, as long as she knows I will e able to fend for myself, which I will. I will hae at least 12,000 dollars in the bank (and I mean at the very, very least) when I graduate. That's enough to at least start me somewhere. And then I can get another job, probably full time, or something at the college I choose to go to, work during the day and go to school at night. I love the thought of it. It makes me want to survive this hell hole of a town that I currently live in.
So yeah, there's my little update. I've missed you all.
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Hi Index! Me too had computer problems. Haven't been here for a couple of weeks.
I am glad to hear you are doing OK!
As you problably know, I also had a PTSS and I too went through a guided imagery with a technique called EMDR. It worked amazingly well. In another thread I heard Shan say EMDR had been a lifesaver for her. I feel the same. So I bet everything will work out fine for you, good luck!
Posts: 1247 | Registered: Apr 2000
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IndexCard, I'm sorry that I used you and your horse in a joke last night on the "good,bad,yo' mama" thread. I just looked for a thread that had about 5 or 6 pages because it fit the joke, then I read that you were selling your horse. I read the rest of the thread this morning. (((IndexCard))) Looks like you have really been through the wringer lately! I'm glad you finally got an appointment and that you're therapist seems cool. Let me agree with CT that you must be open and honest with her so she can help you, particularly in the diagnosis, even though it can painful and difficult. I'll try to e-mail you at mystikal gal @hotmail.com (cool address) with some personal insight Hang in there, kid!
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Morbo, it's okay that you used my horse as a joke in that thread, I haven't even seen it yet. But please, by all means, make jokes about it. It is much easier to deal with that way.
Posts: 219 | Registered: Jan 2003
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Well, everyone, I am leaving for a while. I will talk to you all when I get back... Wish me luck. And those of you who would, please keep me in your prayers because I am really, really scared. But I will be okay (I hope). I will talk to you guys later days. Take care, please.
Goodbye for now.
Posts: 219 | Registered: Jan 2003
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Bye Shan. Good luck. If you get nervous, just remember that you are carrying a bit of Hatrack where ever you go.
Posts: 9754 | Registered: Jul 2002
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I know I haven't really posted much in a while, but I am bringing back my old 'Hand in unloveable hand' thread. Things haven't been going too terribly badly. My boyfriend, Danny, has been living with me for almost a month now, which is awesome- he keeps me company and has been accepted as part of the family. My mom was the one who invited him to stay for a while, and Josh treats him well, as though he were a cool new roommate.
Almost a month ago, I took too many sleeping pills and had to go to the ER. I was in Arrowhead with Danny at the time. Danny saved my life.
Yes, it was on purpose. And yes, Danny literally saved my life. It's a long, touching story if anyone wants to know it. My screenname is sexandmatzo, and you can IM me if you want, and ask about it... I'd be more than happy to *shamelessly* promote my boyfriend's humble bravery.
When I got better, *COUGHthenextdayCOUGH*, they were going to check me into a mental hospital but the lady interviewing me didn't think I needed to be there, after talking to my mom and me for an hour, and just me for an hour. That's why I thought I was going away for a while. But I'm good now. I'm okay. And I'm not touchy on the subject any more. (Okay, so still maybe a little touchy. But hey, things happen.)
I went to see a psychiatrist the other day, separate from my regular therapist's office... so that I wouldn't have to be on a waiting list. She put me on Depakote ER... So far, I've taken 4 doses. Each time, it makes me jumpy and depressed. I'm not sure if there is supposed to be a noticeable difference and how long it will take to kick in... The new lady seems really good at what she does, and she is nice, and I feel comfortable with her.
I'm so in love with Daniel. As I write this, I am watching him sleep, and he looks so peaceful. I hope that for the rest of his life, whether or not I am a part of it, he can feel as peaceful as he looks right now.
Flashbacks have been bad lately. Violent. Danny is there for most of them. He goes to therapy with me every week now. Sandra (Aleksandra) likes him. He tells her things that I can't put to words. He told her that a couple times when I was caught in a flashback, I curled up against the wall and he took my arms o try to turn me over so I wouldn't hurt myself and that I physically fought him off. Kicking, scratching, hitting, the whole bit. I feel terrible about it. Therapy doesn't seem like much at all anymore. We go in, talk to her for 15 minutes about the past week, and she says goodbye, and we leave. My mom is getting peeved at this but there is nothing else much to say. I dunno.
Work is going well. I made my first big paycheck. I worked around 25 hours (give or take) each week the past two weeks and made 309 dollars, hiphip! I was excited. Forgot it at work because I worked 4:30-9, but I don't need it till tomorrow anyway.
Okay, well, I'm going to go make Danny a cake. He turns 18 today. =) So wish him (DannyXcore) a happy birthday, if you will!
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Happy birthday Danny. Glad to see you posting again, IC. So sorry about what you've been through lately. I wish I had words of comfort, but I don't really. Best of luck, IndexCard. Hang in there. Don't give in to despair Posts: 6316 | Registered: Jun 2003
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One thing I can say: drugs like Depakote often take 4-6 weeks or more to be effective.[EDIT:2-3 weeks +] It varys from person to person. Give the drug time to take effect, OK?
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Then we just erased my old OS and reinstalled XP over it- I had Windows 2000 Professional. It was that easy. And my boss, the self acclaimed "Computer genius" thought that the computer was simply done for. Thank goodness for friends like Robert.![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
I love it. The work is never boring- there is alllllways something to do. The people are nice. My boss is intimidating but nice. Funny thing is, she is never there. I have talked to her once since I was hired... and that was for about 30 seconds on the phone when she called for another employee. Hehe. But I love it. Free sandwiches, hip hip! Heh. ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
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