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» Hatrack River Writers Workshop » Forums » Grist for the Mill » How many Hatrackers does it take to change a light bulb? (Page 1)

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Author Topic: How many Hatrackers does it take to change a light bulb?
J
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How many Hatrackers does it take to change a light bulb?

One to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed.

Fourteen to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.

Seven to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs.

Seven more to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs.

Five to flame the spell checkers.

Three to correct spelling/grammar flames.

Six to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb"

Another six to condemn those six as stupid.

Fifteen to claim experience in the lighting industry and give the
correct spelling.

Survivor to post an essay concerning unimportance of light bulbs to short-story writing, and, on a side note the shared aspects of of superior writing and martial prowess from pre-lightbulb societies

Nineteen to post that this group is not about light bulbs and to
please take this discussion to a lightbulb (or light bulb) forum.

Eleven to defend the posting to the group saying that all writers use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this group.

Thirty six to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty.

Seven to post URLs where one can see examples of different light
bulbs.

Four to post that the URLs were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL.

Three to post about links they found from the URLs that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group.

Three to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety
including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too".

Two to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy.

Christine and at least two others to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

Thirteen to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting
questions about light bulbs"

Three to tell a funny story about their writing exploits and a light bulb.

One group lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again.

[This message has been edited by J (edited February 02, 2007).]


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franc li
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My lightbulb in my family room blew. I wonder how long it will take my husband to notice and ask me to change it.
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Avatar300
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quote:
One group lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again.

'Kay. Can someone make a note to remind me of this thread in six months?


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RMatthewWare
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Sometimes I wonder, with all the posts here, whether anyone gets writing done (outside of this forum).

By the way, what am I not doing right now? Oh yeah.

Matt


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ChrisOwens
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Matt,

What does that have to do with lightbulbs?

Check out: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lightbulb

I found it very illuminating...


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Survivor
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Why do I get the essay assignment?
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Elan
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Well, THIS thread made me snort my morning coffee through my nose...
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Max Masterson
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well I agree with Matt, since I found this site I've spent more time reading posts than writing. But what I have written has been a lot better for what I've read on here so I don't mind.

As for why survivor gets to do the essay.....probably cos he's the only one who can!


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RillSoji
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So true Max! I'm waiting for Christine's opinion on light bulbs...
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hoptoad
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has anyone ever hooked up a little light-bulb to a half dozen potatoes and watched it glow?

I like potatoes.


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Zoot
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No, but I once knew a man that hooked up a large light bulb in his shed to grow a certain illegal herb.

He is now being detained at her majesty's pleasure.


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Survivor
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You'd think that people would figure out that you can beat the infrared signature by...um, forget I said anything

Did J mention the part where the thread wanders completely off-topic?


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Zoot
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I still waiting for the essay.
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Survivor
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An essay about lightbulbs...that just seems so grade school. And last century, too.
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RMatthewWare
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I use those new halogen "ice cream cone" bulbs that aren't technically light bulbs at all.

When I type 'lightbulbs' as one word my spell check underlines it in red.

Matt


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Survivor
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Zoot
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Do you think light bulbs are going the way of the dinosaur? Discuss...
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kmckendry
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If it's a 3-Way lightbulb, just use the other settings until I can get to it. I know no one else can change a lightbulb in this house. I also know that there are 55 other lightbulbs that are working, use one of them. Scratch that, only 54, there's one in the basement that no one else can replace either.

Besides, I don't need the lightbulb, I'm listening to the book instead of reading it.

BTW, where IS that essay.


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Rommel Fenrir Wolf II
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I think one would have too much time on ones hands to think of something like that.
But quite funny.
Rommel Wolf II

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RMatthewWare
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Are light bulbs going the way of the dinosaur? It depends on your definition of the term "light bulb". If you mean the bulbs invented by Edison using an electric current that passes through a thin filament, which heats it and causes it to become excited releasing thermally equiliberated photons in the process, then, yes, I do.

If you mean any glass or translucent bulb type device that emits light, then, no.

Matt


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Robert Nowall
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Y'know, I've seen these Edison lightbulbs, some of them dating back to Edison, that are still working. If you want to throw out perfectly acceptable technology in favor of something untried and untested, you might as well work for the post office.
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Survivor
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You remember that scene in National Treasure where Nicholas Cage finds a torch that's been there for over two-hundred years and he totally lights it on fire despite the fact that they have flashlights?

I mean, once you get past the, "Hey, a valuable artifact, let's light it on fire" aspect of that, it really does make a lot of sense...


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Zero
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Well in his defense his co-star was more than moderately attractive and he was probably distracted. Take it up with the Masons. Since they're clearly still strong and influencial...
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hoptoad
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perhaps it was symbolic of the 'flames' of an 'arcane' passion


or perhaps hte director wanted it to look a bit more like tomb-raider


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Rommel Fenrir Wolf II
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Or who would care about a simple torch form 200 years ago when you find the Treasure that is worth more than the torch or flash light. Torches were made to be burned not collected or studied. At least that is what I think anyway.
Rommel Fenrir Wolf II

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RMatthewWare
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Do we care more about the historical significance of the light bulb or the actual use we get from it? Has history been changed significantly because we have a light bulb? Can the current Iran/Iraq crises be blamed on light bulbs or the lack thereof?

Matt


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Chaldea
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Of course if you're British, you don't burn a torch--you'd get an awful smelling plastic puddle and battery acid on your feet. You'd simply switch it on just like our American flashlight counterpart.
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J
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RMatt, whether we can blame the Iraq/Iran situation on light bulb failure depends on whether you are talking about physical ones in the world, or symbolic ones inside certain individuals' heads.
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dreadlord
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Hey, you know something? the guys right!

anyway, I think Ill work on the essay instead of Survivor for once.

now, about the funny story...
GOTCHA! I dont have one!


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RMatthewWare
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So, which current presidential candidate would do the most work to improving the light bulb? I think it could be the overriding issue in this campaign.

Matt


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dreadlord
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maybe Hillary... (scowls at the thought that she might actually win) honestly, though, my sister would be a better candidate, and Shes 7.
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Survivor
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She's precocious with respect to light bulbs, eh?

Why are there never any bald presidential candidates?

Or am I stereotyping baldness by making that connection?


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Rommel Fenrir Wolf II
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The light bulb lead to the invention of the vacuum tube which early radios used along with early computers so yes the light bulb did help along our technological advancements.
As for the Iraq\Iran thing WHAT LIBRAL MINDED PERSON THOUGHT OF THAT
I apologize but it is quite idiotic
Rommel Fenrir Wolf II

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J
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Rommel, have you seen Talladega Nights? There is a scene where Will Ferrell insults his boss, preceded by "With all due respect . . ." Then they have an argument about whether saying "with all due respect" entitled him to say whatever he wanted afterwards, no matter how insulting.

Your last post is kind of like that. Preceding the insult "it is idiotic" with "I apologize" still doesn't entitle you to call anyone, or their perfectly valid political opinion, idiotic.

We play nice on this board. You want to rumble on political issues, and not play nice, then let's take it outside (meaning shoot me an email).


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franc li
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quote:
No, but I once knew a man that hooked up a large light bulb in his shed to grow a certain illegal herb.

But I bought a grow light specifically because my basement is poorly lit and I exercise down there.

I also found a scrap of paper while I was de-junking yesterday that explained that Melatonin is actually a reduction of Seratonin. Well, I don't know if reduction is the right term. The enzymes take stuff off the Seratonin to make Melatonin.


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Rommel Fenrir Wolf II
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I have never heard of Talladega Nights.
I some times let my work and political views get in the way of my thinking. I admit I was wrong and I apologize.
Rommel Fenrir Wolf II

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RMatthewWare
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I'm actually quite conservative. And I think the whole point of this discussion was meant as a joke. A joke that I'm happy to perpetuate.

Matt


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rstegman
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I heard a few days ago that Edison is now a parriah.

His light is inefficiant. It puts out so much energy in unusable wavelengths for the little light it provides.

His light bulb is destroying the world because of the pollution required to energize all of them.

They forget what his light replaced.....


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RMatthewWare
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You misspelled pariah. Besides that, I use the ice cream bulbs. They're supposedly energy effecient and take years to burn out.

Matt


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Tara
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quote:
has anyone ever hooked up a little light-bulb to a half dozen potatoes and watched it glow?
I like potatoes.

You forgot the one Hatracker to post ways to blow up one's basement with a light bulb.


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Rommel Fenrir Wolf II
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Light bulb bombs are the best of the practical jokes ever thought of. Even if your target gets glass in the face.
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Rommel Fenrir Wolf II
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I just recalled a show I saw once on the history channel I think it was the 8 DEGREES OF Frances Bacon on hoe the woolly mammoth led to the invention of the Hubble Space Telescope and some where it talked about how the light bulb came from the wooly mammoth then to the first computer. It is one of those late night fill in shows thing. I think one would have to be stoned out of ones mind to think of such a thing but it did make a little since.
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RMatthewWare
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So, I went to Sam's Club and bought a 10-pack of the new fluorescent light bulbs. They take a couple seconds to turn on, but I like the light quality and the fact that I'm saving energy. You can find Sam's Club by going here: http://www.samsclub.com

It was fun going through the house and changing the light bulbs. Regrettably, I have more than ten light bulbs in use (I have a couple multi-light ceiling fans) and will need to return to Sam's Club.

I used my right hand to replace the bulbs, but I suppose I could have used my left, that arm is just as long.

You have to be careful, though. Bulbs get hot when left on. I've used a sock before to insulate my hand.

I've not actually worked in any lighting industry, but every industry I've worked in has in fact used light bulbs.

Here's a website showing the difference between light bulbs: http://www.gipl.org/CFLs.html

I would like to take this time to say "ditto" to everything that has been said, though I will not copy all posts to do so.

All other queries should be referenced to www.google.com

I have no funny stories about light bulbs. None that are true anyway. Well, maybe one.

I think we'll have to wait six months to see if a lurker responds to the original post.

So, J, I think we covered most of it in this thread.

Matt


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Chaldea
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Rommel that's the funniest thing I've read all night; that the woolly mammoth led to the invention of Hubble via the light bulb. Ooooh, yeah. That sounds like a poem about pumice and neurosurgery. Only a Hatracker would dig that up. I'm LOLing all over my keyboard. Thanks.
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Rommel Fenrir Wolf II
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The light in the shower in our barracks went out a few days ago. Now everyone showers in the dark. Not to fun. I wonder how long it will take to get the work crew to change it?
Rommel Fenrir Wolf II

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starsin
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quote:
One group lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again

hehehe...lurker attack!!


couldn't resist, sorry

- starsin


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InarticulateBabbler
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Rommel, the first time someone feels an invasive procedure in the shower, that light bulb will be changed fast enough.
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Kathleen Dalton Woodbury
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Ahem!
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Rommel Fenrir Wolf II
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Well it wont matter after today for we are leaving. But whoever gets the barracks after us will suffer.
Rommel Fenrir Wolf II

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InarticulateBabbler
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I just had to be the group lurker.
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