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Butter: has to be on the counter or on a shelf
Order of clothes: Panties, bra, pants, shirt, socks, shoes. I do not always follow this exact order, but the first step and the last two are always the same.
Posts: 1015 | Registered: Aug 2004
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The issue with always putting on socks (as they are a contingent step for the always-critical pants) is that many times socks aren't neccessary or even desireable. For instance, on a very hot day socks are a problem. On saturday morning, when I'm loath to leave my dorm room, socks are completely redundant, since my room is warm and soft enough for comfortable sockless lounging. Also, requring socks before pants leads to the spectre of a socks-with-sandals situation.
Posts: 903 | Registered: May 2003
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WP, I happened to go to college in Vermont, where, i believe, you attend school. The sock-and-Birk look is very fashionable, still, even after twenty years have lapsed.
Posts: 10890 | Registered: May 2003
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Meh. Toilet paper replacement used to be a game... put the new roll on top of the old spindle and see if visiting mother or visiting boyfriend would replace it first.
I have butter in a dish on the counter, for spreading on things, and butter in the fridge, for baking, as tart and pie crusts turn out better with cold butter.
Posts: 7954 | Registered: Mar 2004
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quote: WP, I happened to go to college in Vermont, where, i believe, you attend school. The sock-and-Birk look is very fashionable, still, even after twenty years have lapsed.
Yes, socks with sandals is not unheard-of, except wearing socks and sandles together will get you called either a granola-eating socialist or a Vuhmontah, depending on who you ask.
Posts: 903 | Registered: May 2003
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Oooh Eljay, that's terrible! About the toilet paper I mean. How can you leave the bathroom without it being safely on the spindle?! Doesn't that keep you up at night? Posts: 6415 | Registered: Jul 2000
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Work pants with knee highs have to be socks first becuase the legs won't pull up high enough to get the hose all the way on.
If I'm wearing jeans, I'm usually wandering barefoot around the house. I'll put socks on if I go somewhere.
Posts: 2283 | Registered: Dec 2003
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Toilet paper- inside the tiny cupboard shaped like an outhouse by the toilet, with the loose end against the back wall. Otherwise, in the morning all the toilet paper is in a messy pile below the holder and must be rerolled, then cringed at when using because it had cat germs and bite holes on it. Once she even got the end through the little moon-shaped window in the cupboard door and dispensed it into the living room. We tried a coffee can with a lid like we use at camp, but she just rolled the can around the house then.
Posts: 1379 | Registered: Feb 2002
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Toilet paper- inside the tiny cupboard shaped like an outhouse by the toilet, with the loose end against the back wall. Otherwise, in the morning all the toilet paper is in a messy pile below the holder and must be rerolled, then cringed at when using because it had cat germs and bite holes on it. Once she even got the end through the little moon-shaped window in the cupboard door and dispensed it into the living room. We tried a coffee can with a lid like we use at camp, but she just rolled the can around the house then.
Posts: 1379 | Registered: Feb 2002
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DH, The thing about the sock-n-Birk thing is that, int the winter, inside, it is the perfect footwear. Warm, comfortable, and orthopedically supportive. I ask you, what harm is ther in that? And if you are called a granola-eater or a Vermonter, so what? you are among granola eaters and Vermonters. It is the dominant culture you are a part of now.
Posts: 10890 | Registered: May 2003
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Nope. There is no paper on the spindle right now, as a matter of fact. It bothers me not one whit.
The only reason the game stopped is because I was foolish enough to tell the other participants that they were playing it. They didn't find it nearly as amusing as I did. Of course, that particular boyfriend is long gone, too, but the game ended prior to the relationship.
Posts: 7954 | Registered: Mar 2004
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Unless you have a child or pet that is prone to play with the toilet paper, It should definitely go over NOT under.
Whether the butter goes in the fridge or in the cupboard depends on how quickly you use it and for what purposes and what season it is. Butter will keep longer in the fridge so if you don't use it often, keep it in the fridge. I you use it mostly for cooking, backing and on hot dishes -- keep it in the fridge. If you spread a lot on room temperature bread, then its OK to keep a small amount outside the fridge in cool weather. In the summer, the butter will get far too soft and its frankly very wasteful to cool the entire house down to 65°F just to keep the butter firm when you could put the butter in the fridge and wear shorts.
If it makes a difference to you whether people put on their socks, pants or shirt first -- you are probably some sort of nazi.
Shoes shouldn't be put on until you are ready to leave the house. Only uncivilized brutes were their outdoor footwear in the house.
Posts: 12591 | Registered: Jan 2000
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"If it makes a difference to you whether people put on their socks, pants or shirt first -- you are probably some sort of nazi."
Oh, really? Well, maybe when I was in fifth grade, and we had a physical in school, and the nurse told us to go in the little room and strip down to our undies and put on the johnnie, maybe, just maybe, I had forgotten to out on my undies that day. And maybe the nurse said, loud enough for the rest of the class(boys too) to hear: "What's the matter, you don't have your panties? Just wear your tights."
[ December 31, 2004, 07:50 PM: Message edited by: Elizabeth ]
Posts: 10890 | Registered: May 2003
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The butter: Keep in fridge. When preparing toast, set stick on top of toaster oven or next to pop-up toaster so the butter softens slightly as the bread turns a lovely golden brown. Butter toast. Return butter to fridge. Or, if you're my wife, place think slices of butter on bread and then stick in toaster oven so that melting butter permeates bread as it toastifies. Cold butter may only be spread on bread if it is sufficiently thick and/or sturdy enough to withstand it, such as fresh-out-of-the-oven wheat bread sliced approximately to the thickness of a Harry Potter book and consumed as a meal unto itself.
The toilet paper: Depends on the location of the toilet paper holder, the style of the holder, and the preferences of the users. Since we currently have three adults and a child using one bathroom, rolls never last long enough to make it on the roll anyway.
Cream in the coffee: Coffee is evil. People should drink tea, which is best prepared pre-sweetened, in a tall glass full of ice. Free refills are mandatory.
Order of putting on clothes: Pants first, as this is always jeans and therefore matches everything. Then you may decide on a shirt at your leisure, grab a pair of socks, walk downstairs and don socks and shoes while reading e-mail and Hatrack posts on such self-evident things as proper order.
Posts: 7790 | Registered: Aug 2000
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quote:Pants first, as this is always jeans and therefore matches everything. Then you may decide on a shirt at your leisure, grab a pair of socks, walk downstairs and don socks and shoes while reading e-mail and Hatrack posts on such self-evident things as proper order.
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Addendum to clothes order: If shorts or light slacks are worn, underwear first. Else, see above.
Posts: 7790 | Registered: Aug 2000
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And yet my butter suggestions go unheralded. I knew it, you people are only interested in one thing.
Posts: 7790 | Registered: Aug 2000
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Hey, socks and sandals are the most comfy combo, especially if they are fleecy socks. Especially a funky patterned fleece sock with Birkies.
Posts: 1021 | Registered: Sep 2004
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In these parts bare feet is the most comfortable and the most often worn in this house, unless housekeeping has slipped to the point where protective footwear is advised.
Posts: 7790 | Registered: Aug 2000
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Butter: Fridge. Always the fridge. Especially if you happen to be living in an Australian summer where the temperature regularly tops 100 degrees. You can always get it out a little ahead of buttering to allow some softening time. (or, if you're my father, nuke it for 10 seconds, so that the outside turns liquid and the solids and fats separate, and my mother rolls her eyes, sighs and makes that frustrated clicking sound with her tongue against the roof of her mouth...)
toilet paper: My goodness Eljay...I thought I'd invented that game... I have no preference for over / under. Just don't buy paper with cute little pictures of teddy bears or that kind of stuff printed on it. I mean really - think about what you're going to do to that poor bear/fish/bunny/whatever...
coffee:Nectar of the Gods. Get a decent espresso machine and learn to use it. Tony's perfect flat white: Filtered water always, heat your milk on the steamer. Keep the milk moving while you extract your shot of espresso into a warmed espresso cup. Add sugar to your (also pre-warmed) coffee cup, then the espresso - poured in one steady movement so as not to destroy the crema, then add your milk holding back the foam until the end. Stir a pattern into the lovely thick crema that should form from the espresso shot and the milk foam. If making for Imogen, add a shot of good quality vanilla syrup. Sip and wait for that sweet, sweet caffene to hit the bloodstream... ahhh....
Dressing:
1. Ensure fully awake. This is more important and less self explanatory than it might first sound. Trust me.
2. Glasses. Clear vision is not a luxury, it's a necessity.
3. Underwear. it's Kind of like insurance - essential cover just in case something goes wrong...
4. Pants.
5. Shirt.
6. Socks (if wearing - left first, always.)
7. Shoes. (Right first. Don't ask me why, I have no idea...)
posted
Scythrops, Aside from your horrendous butter philosophy and your order of dressing, you are OK. Since I do not have an espresso machine, I cannot follow that plan, but it would be the only condition where I would advocate for a coffee first move.
You know, you are right on, so to speak, when you say the left sock goes on first. I totally forgot to mention that! I can see undies-pants being sort of a guy thing, for some reason. Not sure why. Maybe because then I could see my hub's sexy chest longer? Yeah, I like that theory.
Posts: 10890 | Registered: May 2003
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How do you put your glasses on before your shirt? That is, unless it's a button-up. Glasses are the first thing on if worn, but they come off while the shirt goes on.
Posts: 1547 | Registered: Jan 2004
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Boon
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No, you put your face through the neckhole first. That way you don't have to take them back off. Silly.
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It still does odd things to my glasses. The frames are really thin, and they get bent really easily. They slide off my nose constantly whenever I wear them as it is, no matter how often I bring them in to be readjusted. Besides, if I stick my face through first, it stretches out the neck holes of my shirts.
Posts: 1547 | Registered: Jan 2004
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I work from home and tend to favour casual, loose neck (ie: *real* old and comfy) T-shirts. Combined with the face first method mentioned above, they generally slip on over the glasses no problems...
I should also point out that the real crimes against butter committed by my family are mainly my father's - he once popped the butter in the microwave just for "a couple of seconds", but mis-hit the timer button, then forgot about it, and ten or so minutes later discovered about half a pound of molten, oily butter oozing out under the microwave door. Now that's a deplorable butter offence.
Posts: 466 | Registered: Sep 2003
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I haven't worn socks since winter or spring of 2003. Haven't worn nylons in at least a decade.
Butter. Fridge. Too hot here - if left outside, it would be melted into a puddle. Besides which, we don't go through enough butter to warrant leaving it outside even if it wasn't this hot.
Toothpaste. From the end, but that's because the tube is metal, and squeezing from the middle makes it very difficult to get the stuff at the end out. Thick metal. It actual gets metal fatique and splits open.
Posts: 8355 | Registered: Apr 2003
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I think it’s appropriate to use my 200th post for this important topic. Look, toilet paper rolls were a fine invention and all, but honestly, I prefer: one, if we must use toilet paper in roll form, that we not use the spindle. Either way we position it, the cats will shred it. Two, the times the household has run out of the rolled stuff, I’ve been thrilled with the convenience and efficiency of the pop-up tissue box. Just take a few if you only need a few. The box sits neatly, wherever we put it. It doesn’t roll if you drop it (which often necessitates an embarrassing crouching waddle to go get it from next to the bathtub).
posted
You know, Sharpie, I think you should market that idea, the toilet paper in tissue box idea.
As for microwaving butter, I tried that once, when frustrated with the hard refridgerated butter at hand. I did not get a puddle, but when I took it out, the whole stick collapsed, having melted on the inside first.
Posts: 10890 | Registered: May 2003
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Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought that toilet paper was made in such a way that it dissolved when it hit water, whereas facial tissue does not. And therefore, facial tissue used in the place of toilet paper can cause the toilet to clog. And that would always be a bad thing. Posts: 8355 | Registered: Apr 2003
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You are correct, but emergencies are emergncies. My thought was for Sharpie to design a dispenser for toilet paper which looks like tissue.
My friend's mother decreed that she and her brother should use three squares of tp per unrination. It would be much easier for them to just pull three sheets out of the box, you know?
Posts: 10890 | Registered: May 2003
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Oh, emergencies - nah, that's a whole other ballgame. My brother, the slob who never bothered buying necessities until he was out would use anything, including paper towels or newspaper. Yeesh! I didn't much enjoy visiting him. . . Posts: 8355 | Registered: Apr 2003
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They've started marketing some paper towels in cartons rather than rolls; why not toilet paper?
Posts: 628 | Registered: Nov 1999
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Sure - once they have toilet paper in a carton, you'll probably go ahead and start putting it on the back of the toilet perpendicular to the wall. Posts: 26071 | Registered: Oct 2003
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quote:My friend's mother decreed that she and her brother should use three squares of tp per unrination.
Okay, first of all, I'm vaguely disturbed by that.
Secondly, why should her brother have to use any toilet paper at all for urination? That's a waste of toilet paper, frankly.
Posts: 1814 | Registered: Jul 2004
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Some of you are more nuts than others, but I came in to clear somethings up. First, as to the butter, if it would melt and loose it's stick form outside of the fridge (durring the summer months) then it must be kept in the fridge. Take Chris's suggestion for warming up for toast, also it can be placed by a hot stove when in use for fast warm-ups. In some places the butter must always be in the fridge (near the equator), in some places it can always be left out of it which is prefferable since it reduces the number of steps in preparing food, as well as making it easier to apply.
Toilet paper goes on the outside, anyone who says different, we're searching for your spacecraft now, don't try to hide it, we'll find it eventually anyways.
Clothes order: underwear first, always. Then a T-Shirt, then real shirt (which can also be a T-Shirt on casual days) then pants (this insures easy tuck-in) then socks, then shoes (if you'll be inside all day and have carpeted floors skipping socks and shoes is permissiable, but if there will be shoes on your feet there will also be socks, period. And as to your sandal complaints, sandels are for people without a moral compass).
Ideally toilet paper should be stored in a cuboard easily accesible from the toilet since it will undoubtly run out when you are not predisposed to moving a whole lot from the toilet.
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