posted
The Designer feeds on turtle panic; somewhere in the world a turtle must always be freaking out about being unable to flip itself rightside up, or He will dwindle to nothing. Humans were actually created to manage the upsidedown turtles--too many upsidedown at once, and He is intoxicated by the inrushing power (and if *way* too many flip over the future existence of His food source is threatened). Too few and He starves. It's the whole reason we've got opposable thumbs. It's a telling but little-known fact that the literal translation of the proto-Indo-European word for "thumb" is "turtle flipper".
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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quote:Originally posted by Bob_Scopatz: The one I read about was "climbing" up walls and would fall backwards as a consequence. Apparently they aren't wired to learn that this behavior results in tipping over.
How could anyone have any faith in Darwinism after reading THAT?
Well, if you want a serious answer, if the problem really is a smooth precisely vertical wall, millions of years of evolutionary history could well leave any critter with an inability to deal with it, if there are no such things in the normal environment. Turtles flip and have ways of righting themselves. If they are placed in an environment where their usual tricks don't work, it's simply explained that their self-righting behaviors evolved in a different environment -- presumably one where the tricks did work sufficiently so that other strategies didn't need to evolve.
It's not that difficult to come up with an explanation within an evolutionary framework for practically anything. The problem is knowing whether the explanation is true.
Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000
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posted
Count Elmer does have a ramp to get to his water dish, and he also has half a hollowed-out log to hide in. I noticed this afternoon that he was trying to climb up the side of the log, so that's probably how he flipped over. Poor thing. I'm going to try to set up a little pen for him so that I can take him out of the tank and let him run around.
Random question: is it possible to get diseases from sharing laundry machines with people? Y'see, at my last apartment we had our own laundry, which my parents gave me brand new. And here, it's a shared laundry room, and I've been really worried about germs, especially since I don't want to have all my colors get jumbled up if I wash them in hot, but I don't know what else to do. Does bleach alternative disinfect?
quote:Research shows that it is rare to become infected from handling biologically infected garments. However, until this clothing is washed or dry cleaned, we encourage you to wear disposable rubber gloves and discard the gloves after use. Laundering is the preferred method of cleaning because of the many flushes used in the laundering process.
And this is talking about actually contaminated clothing, not just the machine.
If you're still worried:
quote:Disinfecting your home laundry can be done inexpensively, easily and without damage to the fabric. Microbiologists at U.S.D.A.’s Textile and Clothing laboratory have identified 4 categories of products which are effective, safe for fabrics and are available in local stores. Use the amount of disinfectant listed on the product's label. These are:
1. Pine oil disinfectants, which are effective in hot and warm water. Some brands include Pine Sol, Real Pine, Spic-n-Span Pine and Lysol Pine Action. They should be added at the beginning of the wash cycle.
2. Phenolic disinfectants are also effective in hot and warm water. Lysol brand disinfectant is available locally. Phenolic disinfectants may be added to the wash or rinse water, if the rinse water is warm.
3. Liquid chlorine disinfectants may be used in hot, warm or cold water temperatures. Chlorine bleach should always be diluted with water before adding it to the washer, and should never be poured directly on clothing. It also is not suitable for use on wool, silk, spandex or certain dyed and finished fabrics. Be sure to read the care labels on all items to be washed. Examples of liquid chlorine bleaches include Clorox and all supermarket house brands.
4. The last category, quartenary disinfectants, is extremely effective in all water temperatures, but is less available than the other products. The Amway company manufactures Pursue, which is specifically formulated for laundry. Label directions should be followed. Many household cleaners contain the effective disinfecting ingredients, but are not recommended for laundry purposes.
quote:Quaternary disinfectants ("quats"), are available. CO-OP Sanitizer is available in certain supermarkets; Roccal is available from janitor, dairy, and poulry supply houses.
The following liquid chlorine bleaches are available in grocery stores: Clorox, King (liquid) Bleach, Purex.
The following pine oil disinfectants are available in grocery stores: Fyne Pyne, Fyne Tex, White Cap, King Pine.
The following phenolic disinfectants are available in grocery stores: Al Pine , Pine-Sol.
Check local supermarkets or drugstores for "house brand" products, too.
posted
It seems to me as a I read over my last post, that it is also equal proof against intelligent design. I mean, who designs a turtle that can't deal with vertical surfaces?
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posted
I wonder if it makes your clothes smell all Lysol-y. I would like to do this, since I have laundry that includes some stuff like kitchen rags that have been used to wipe up spilled food, and cats linens that have been cat-barfed upon. Right now I put non-chlorine bleach in every load, about 1/3 of a cup, and leave most loads to soak overnight before rinsing. If a load is particularly icky, I have been known to run it through the wash twice, even though it always smells perfectly clean after the first time through my machine. I certainly wouldn't use Pine Sol on my clothes, as its smell is overpowering to me. Chlorine bleach will ruin many things, so I don't often use it.
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posted
I think it needs to be said that catching illness-causing germs from an empty washing machine or dryer is extremely unlikely. A person is far less likely to catch a disease from a washing machine than they are just sitting in a classroom with other people or sharing a bus with other people.
In other words, this is not something you should be worrying about. This is not something that is ever going to happen to you.
I agree with Bob. This week I think you need to be in contact with someone in health care who knows you.
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posted
If you're really concerned about germs, I would run a empty load on "hot" and add a high concentration of chlorine bleach before starting your actual laundry. Depending on how much your washer costs to operate, this is probably better than smelling like Pine-Sol.
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posted
Just picking a washing machine that is bone-dry and has been empty for some period of time would be an option too. Many bugs/germs can't live on a dry metallic surface for very long. Assuming there were some there in the first place.
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posted
If you're washing your clothes with soap, you don't have to worry any more about getting germs from the laundry machine than from any other surface. There's no reason to use any special stuff.
It's just a laundry machine, it's not a biological warfare disposal unit.
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quote:Originally posted by MightyCow: It's just a laundry machine, it's not a biological warfare disposal unit.
I can't even stand to take my laundry to a wash dry fold place because I can't stand the thought of another human being handling my underwear. Germs. Lots and lots of germs. I really need to just thoroughly clean and organize my house; a clean house makes for less anxiety overall.
And I'm in contact with mental health people constantly, so no worries . I go to therapy three times a week, each time focusing on a different method. The laundry thing isn't really new. I mean, people put their underwear in there and their sweaty clothes and stuff that they've spat on and their sheets that have God knows what on them...I've been considering having my washer and dryer installed in my house, except that there really isn't space for them, aside from the fact that the condo doesn't have hookups.
posted
Well, my point was that there are no more germs in the washer than there are anywhere else. In fact, the washing machine is constantly filled with soapy water and then rinsed with clean water. I would guess that it has less germs than anywhere other public place in the building.
The other people in the building aren't germ-zombies are they? I doubt they have particularly filthy, germ-ladened clothes.
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posted
I have OCD...reminding me that there are germs everywhere is probably a bad idea. I try to ignore that so that I can continue to function as a human being.
posted
A Rat Named Dog: What you described sounds identical to what my son experiences -- and he has Tourette's with OCD (relatively mild for both of them). But those little noises in the back of the throat, eye movements, face "twitches": my son's neurologist calls them tics. Quite a spectrum for some of these things, I think.
Posts: 628 | Registered: Nov 1999
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posted
Sharpie, I blink compulsively. Like I blink at things a certain number of times. Or tap things. So yeah, it varies. And I wonder how they tell really, if it's Tourette's or OCD or what?
On the health front, the loud doctor man has informed me that I have some kind of infection and that instead of the Macro-stuff, I need to take penicillin. I've only taken penicillin once, in elementary school, and I got a rash. But they told me it was from playing in the sun while on antibiotics. And I'm not allergic to amoxicillin, which supposedly means that I shouldn't be allergic to penicillin. So hooray. Off to the pharmacy I go.
Y'know, I bet if I wasn't so anxious all the time, I wouldn't get sick so much. Yet another motivation to organize my house.
Edit: Well, great. See, the doctor didn't really say much about the infection except that I have one of some sort and that all of my tests aren't back yet. So now I'm going to spend the rest of the night convinced that I have some kind of venereal disease and will probably, at some point, decide that it is a good idea to apply hydrogen peroxide to that area. Okay. Cleaning cleaning cleaning cleaning planting flowers painting cabinets decorating organizing. Have to think of something else. And take Ativan.
Which means that I am totally screwed on getting my schoolwork done tonight. I hate you, brain.
quote:Yet another motivation to organize my house.
For most of the OCD people I know, actually managing to organize their house would not eliminate their anxiety; it would simply force them to refocus it. There are exceptions, of course, but I think it would help to be aware of the fact that your anxiousness in this regard is a symptom of your illness, not a consequence of some failure.
(As a humorous aside, and I mention this only because I also see elements of her in myself, are you familiar with the character of Hannelore in the webcomic "Questionable Content?" *grin*)
Posts: 37449 | Registered: May 1999
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posted
Better to refocus my anxiety in a constructive manner, though. Instead of, I don't know, picking apart paper towels fiber by fiber. I just feel much more relaxed when my house looks nice. It makes it easier to think. Maybe it's because my mom always kept the house freakishly neat, including my room. She just organizes stuff. All the time. If I go home to visit, she'll clean my car and probably vaccuum it and hang a little trash bag in there, too. So I grew up with things really neat, but without the urge to keep them neat myself because...everything was just really clean on its own. And now I live by myself, and the clutter just feels wrong to me. Any clutter.
I bought paintbrushes and this really cute green set of mugs and a pitcher because I'm throwing out all my old dishes...and another season of the Simpsons.
What bothers me is that I can't be doing "thinking" work so much when I'm super anxious. It has to be something creative and preferably involving my hands, so painting, decorating, and so forth. That's the thing. I'm not just going to be able to sit and "relax" or "de-stress." So I just feel like it's better, if I'm going to have to DO something, to do something constructive as opposed to blinking or spinning in circles or whatever. Actually, I do really well at math when I'm like this too.
And no, I don't think I know about her, Tom. But I've read the comic a few times.
posted
You don't have a venereal disease. He is a urologist. You have a urinary tract infection, I would think. That's about the only infection urologists treat.
I can't even think of any likely venereal diseases that would be easily discovered by a urologist that are treated with penicillin. Plus I can only think of one std that is treated with penicillin, but it is usually intramuscular penicillin.
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I'm still really freaking out about a lot of things, not the least of which being that I finish undergrad today.
Today.
I'm twenty-one. My boyfriend didn't get his bachelor's until he was twenty-five, and he doesn't seem to understand why I am totally and completely freaking out.
My therapist is making me see some EMDR specialist on Tuesday. She thinks I have PTSD in addition to the OCD, and she's probably right. In all honesty, this whole thing is bothering me even more. I mean, do you have any idea how much money I spend on therapists and psychiatrists and crap? More in a year than I'd be spending if I were paying my mortgage. It worries me. I mean, what if I can never really function like a normal human being? I'm having all this trouble, and I don't even have any REAL WORLD stress yet. So what do I do when I get a real job? Go to therapy six days a week? How am I going to pay for that?
posted
Living with someone with fairly severe psychological problems, your fears are very familiar. You probably are improving- even if somedays you don't think you are. Those little steps will add up. Also, there are new medications and new treatment options. For real world jobs, think about the situations you do best in and what jobs will accomodate you. If you find a job is too tough, remember that there are other jobs and that just because this one didn't fit doesn't mean anything against you. You might even find that you do better at some jobs than you did in college.
Posts: 1001 | Registered: Mar 2006
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posted
So my graduation weekend has been absolutely horrible. And now I wish that I could just fall asleep on command and sleep for as long as I wanted because sleep seems to be the only thing I can do right.
I invited two friends to come hang out at my house. We decided to go eat at this restaurant, and one of the guys wanted to go to some bars, so we did that, and then they were ready to leave, so I told them to hold on a sec so I could run to the restroom. On my way back out, I ran into this guy I hadn't seen in two years. He used to be kind of creepy, and he used to have a big thing for me, but...I don't know, I got this sense that maybe he'd grown up or something, and he mentioned having a girlfriend. So we talked for a little bit, and I said I had to go get my friends.
He came outside with me. The two guys were gone. I called them, and when they finally called back, they said that they'd decided to walk back to my house (we'd taken my car, and one of them was the DD). Thing is, they had absolutely no idea how to get back to my house. And by this point, I was really mad that they'd just walked off and left me. Who does that?
So Freshman Year Guy offered to go pick them up and drop them off at their truck, which I was cool with. Then we came back and I met one of his friends, who was a sweetheart and who kept trying to get me to swing dance with him. So I invited the two of them to come over and watch movies at my house.
Mistake.
They started flipping through the pay-per-view porn. I told them that was totally not cool and made them change the channel. FYG called his girlfriend, and I gave her directions to get here, and then she and I went out to get a bottle of liquor for everyone to share. I left my phone and my keys on the coffee table because we were just going to walk down the street.
Well, we finally got back (without liquor), and the two of them plus the guy who came with the girlfriend were, surprise surprise, watching pay per view porn. And on top of that, my boyfriend had tried to call.
So I kicked them out of my house. And it really upset me because all I wanted was just to hang out with some friends and maybe drink some wine and watch some movies, and it's just like...I can't even do that right.
So I pretty much slept all day today because every time I woke up, I just started crying and had to take ativan. And Michael still hasn't spoken to me all day. I just am so upset with everyone and everything right now. And what if Michael is mad at me and breaks up with me or something? And if he's not mad, why isn't he talking to me?
I just want to go to sleep, but I'm too upset.
Anyways, I guess that doesn't have much to do with ocd, but I'm just really depressed now, and I always feel like whenever I really need people, they're not there for me. You know?
Also, I think FYG might've stolen my house keys. I wouldn't put it past him...he was kind of shifty back in the day. And the thing is, they weren't on the coffee table where I left them when I got back, but I thought maybe someone might've moved them for some reason...but....they're nowhere to be found.
In conclusion, I really need to stop believing that people are good.
posted
Oy. I believe that most people are good. I probably wouldn't bring folk back to my house like that, but, hey, I'm guessing that your place is MUCH tidier than mine. And if I did have guest over, unless I knew them extremely well (like, say, if they were family) I wouldn't have left the house with them there. So, yeah, that part probably was poor judgment. Live and learn. And, I'm guessing that it would be a good idea to change your door locks. Or add a new one. I mean, this is a bad thing that you can see coming and can easily dodge, right?
The problem that folk like you and I have, folk who go about believing that most people are good until proven otherwise, is that sometimes we get disappointed. Even so, I would rather be disappointed in people now and again, than to be constantly suspicious and dubious about people's motives.
Let me know how the EMDR thing goes. I know someone who did it once. He said that it wasn't hard or bad or scary, just kind of strange.
Posts: 10397 | Registered: Jun 2005
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posted
I had a patient last year who thought EMDR helped her much more than anything she had ever tried before. Unfortunately, she then moved to my town, where EMDR was not available. We actually parted on bad terms shortly before I left that job, I never could reach her after that to see how she was doing.
posted
I really don't think I understand this EMDR thing. And I'm really not sure that it won't just make things worse.
Like, my extreme phobia of pregnancy, pregnant women, and young children. My therapist thinks it's because when I was born, I had a nanny, and my mom worked. When my mom had my little brother, she let the nanny go and stayed home to work. Therefore, I associate pregnant women with abandonment, or something.
And I really don't think focusing on that is going to help me. My general strategy is to just try to put all of that sort of thing in one little corner of my brain and keep it there where I can ignore it for as long as humanly possible until something happens that I absolutely have to think about it.
It's like how I deal with public speaking. I just sort of...try as hard as I can not to think about my surroundings unless I absolutely have to. I maintain "eye contact" with my audience by looking through them instead of at them.
Is it really going to help me to focus on this stuff?
I don't know. I'm definitely depressed and spazzing out right now, and I'm trying as hard as I can just to avoid all those feelings so that I don't spend the whole day crying in my room. So I'm sleeping or...putting together this new lamp that I bought or organizing my house...
I finally found a charity to pick up my furniture, but the guy called me back yesterday morning, and I didn't feel like having contact with the outside world, so I didn't answer the phone.
I'm getting some damn Applebee's. It's not likely that I'll have more than one meal today anyway. Maybe I'll be able to drag myself out to go biking.
Do you like salad? I don't eat at Applebee's, but I did see an ad on TV for their salads. Two hippie guys standing in a garden, playing guitar and bass, and singing about eating Applebee's salads. I like hippie guys who sing in gardens. If I thought that planting one would attract them, I'd definitely plant a garden. But in my experience, it mostly attracts rabbits, deer, groundhogs, slugs, and other produce thieves.
(Did that tangent help you to feel better? Sometimes when I don't know what to say, I land up changing the subject, and if I do it deftly enough, sometimes people don't notice. I'll bet you noticed, though. Well, I hope it helped anyway.)
Posts: 10397 | Registered: Jun 2005
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posted
pH - I don't claim to know what you're going through but I can lay claim to my own sort of 'torture' at the hands of myself.
What it all comes down to is working out what sort of talking and to what sort of people actually helps you make sense of yourself. That doesn't mean that the 'experts' know best, it means what works for you. Also from my own experience, as much as I wanted to only listen to my peers, there were some of these 'experts' that had some good things to say to set me back on the right track.
I hope that in your journey you find some of the same type people I found to get me back to the whole person I am now. I got caught up in myself (that's how I look at it now) and lost sight of the bigger picture, which is what myself can achieve if I'm not caught up so much with the small stuff.
posted
pH, the lesson to learn from the creepy people is not that anything is your fault. It's not. They were acting badly, not you. The lesson to learn is to be careful selecting your friends, and the people you hang out with. And, yes, don't leave people alone in your house unless they are close friends that you trust a lot.
Let your bf have a little breathing room, if he needs it. He might need some time to himself or something. Don't sweat that. Take the time yourself to just relax and be good to yourself. Pretend you're at a spa, and eat really well, sleep well, and exercise. Get some sunshine.
People who hang out in bars and drink a lot can sometimes be not very responsible or mature people. Just saying. Be careful.
Posts: 6246 | Registered: Aug 2004
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posted
Tante, I haven't tried the newer salads yet! I want to though, even though the ads are the worst, haha. I like the oriental chicken roll-ups. And the onion peels.
One of the original two morons I was hanging out with dumped a bunch of nachos on the backseat floor of my car. Yeah, I'm going to continue to ignore their calls.
I did get to talk to my boyfriend...he's just having a bad weekend and was afraid that if he called, I'd yell at him, and also he hit a possum last night driving home from work at 4am and felt really bad about it. Stuff like that. But I don't blame him; I've been really snappy lately.
posted
It seems to me that the entirety of the programming on USA Network is Law and Order marathon.
Wait. Onion peels? That's food? And they sell it at the restaurant? I just throw mine out. How in the world are they preparing onion peels that make you like them?
Posts: 10397 | Registered: Jun 2005
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posted
EMDR actually seems kind of cool. We kind of condensed two sessions into one, so we did a history of trauma and also worked on relaxation "safe place" techniques. The relaxation stuff actually worked really, really well; I was way less stressed for most of the day.
Unfortunately, the therapist is both under thirty and attractive.
Anyways, I'm feeling a lot better. I've been a little irritable because of these weird headaches I've had for the last few days, but other than that, I think I'm okay.
posted
*hug* I didn't see this thread until today. I knew you some ocd issues but reading what your life is like helped me to understand you that much better, I think. Some of your experiences resonated with me. I know that I have some obsessive and compulsive tendancies. I tend to be very particular about the placement of objects on horizontal surfaces. I'm sure it makes my mom nuts that when I go to her house, I often move her things around. I know my husband finds it entertaining when clutter reaches my threshold and I must straighten regardless of the hour or anything else going on. I never really considered it unusual to occasionally have totally off-the-wall thoughts - like your Not-Me (being concerned about cutting off my fingers while I'm preparing dinner, wondering what it would be like to just suddenly drive off the road into oncoming traffic, or wondering what it would be like to shoot someone). I like making lists for everything. I tend to be quite fidgety (shaking my feet usually). I don't particularly like talking on the phone and sometimes find it really hard to return people's phone calls. I can remember a period of several weeks when I was simply unable to decide what to do and so couldn't do anything. Anyway, I don't know what my point is - I suppose I'm rambling. I guess maybe what I'm trying to say is that you're not alone in the struggle to figure out how to make your life work. I'm really glad you have good therapists and doctors to help you figure it out.
posted
Thanks a ton for the support, you guys. Emotionally, I'm feeling a whole lot better, especially since I got to spend the day with one of my friends.
I'm having trouble sleeping, and silly me forgot to get my ativan refilled, so I'm waiting for the Benadryl Sinus to kick in. I needed some for my headache, anyway.
I think the most frustrating thing about not being able to sleep is the fact that the rest of the world is so quiet that there is very little with which I can distract my mind. I mean, there are movies on tv and stuff, but there aren't many people online, and it's dark, and very few people are still awake. It gives my mind far too much leeway. My thoughts often seem to get worse at night, which is why the ativan has been so helpful. For a while, I took Sonata too, which works a lot faster than ativan. Because usually for my night anxiety, all I really need is to go to sleep. The ativan is useful both at night and during the day, though. But I kind of miss having the Sonata around. The time between taking my medicine and waiting until I can actually fall asleep is always really uncomfortable. I wonder if I should talk to my doctor about taking Sonata again, as needed. It would really come in handy right about now. I mean, under normal circumstances, 30 ativan can last me a couple of months. And I don't feel the need for Sonata nearly as much. Don't remember if it's habit-forming, though. He always cautions me about the habit-forming properties of ativan, but I've never had a problem.
I had a problem with geodon. Which apparently, isn't supposed to be habit-forming, at all. But if I didn't take it, I wouldn't sleep. At all. If I didn't take it for three days, I would be awake for three days, and no amount of ativan or sonata or unisom would help.
It's weird, y'know? I mean, people sometimes say that a lot of times, people use drugs to avoid problems or numb the emotional pain, or something. I guess I kind of did that. I mean, I was never, you know, into drugs, but when I was having all that trouble with sleep, I wouldn't turn down a xanax or something. I just wanted some rest, not to get a buzz or anything. I just wanted to sleep like a normal human being. 'course, I only tried that stuff a couple of times, but even that only put me out for two hours. Haha, now I've admitted that. Now I can never run for public office!
Anyways, I mostly just wanted to babble for a little bit to sort of give my brain something non-circular to think about until I felt a little more sleepy. So now I think I'm going to try to sleep again.
I do feel a lot better though. And if the whole sickly thing really is a blood sugar issue, that would explain why I've been so snappy and easily upset lately. Well, I mean, there are other stressors. But I just feel like I've had a ridiculously short fuse as of late. Well, until yesterday. Then I started to feel a little better. Still really touchy, but not as much. At least, I don't think so. And I don't feel as though I stay upset as long. I never used to have too much of a temper, but now a lot of times, I feel like I need to defend myself somehow.
One last, random note: This isn't to ANY of you guys at all. It's just something that some people I know in real life have said to me. You know, I've never understood how someone can just tell me, "Oh, I used to be a little ocd, but then I just woke up one morning and decided that it was crazy, and that I should stop. That means that if you just wake up one morning and decide to stop, it'll go away." ...well, okay. Good for you. When you have lain awake nights for weeks on end trying to figure out how many thousands of times you have to blink at a particular spot on the wall before you can go to bed to prevent something terrible from happening (and of course, if your roommate or anything else interrupts you, you have to start over), then you can tell me about how you just woke up one day and decided not to be like that anymore.
I never say that to any of these people, though. I feel like it entices them to try to get into some kind of "crazier than thou" battle. And that's not right. I mean, I don't want to belittle their pain, and they shouldn't try to belittle mine. Y'know? I just find it strange that there are people who think it's a contest. I dated a guy like that once. He would never just listen to what I was trying to say. He always had to one-up me, no matter what I was talking about. Including if I was trying to explain my mental issues to him. Maybe tomorrow I'll tell you this spectacular story about him (if I haven't already; I don't remember, and I didn't re-read the first page of this thread before I started typing this post). It pretty much describes our entire relationship.
Well. There's more to the story, but the short version is this: Guy calls me and tells me that he got fired from his job and is driving west and is just going to drive until his car runs out of gas and then go try to rob a bank and get shot by the cops. I pause for a moment, then say very calmly, "[Guy]. you can't go get killed by the cops because my laptop is in your car."
Anyways. This is my random ocd-related babbling for now. I'm going to try to sleep again.
I mean, seriously. The government is such a **** block. And if there's one thing I'm bad at, it's handling uncertainty and weird schedules and being out of contact.
I'm trying as hard as I can to keep myself busy because I'm afraid I'll start obsessing over the whole "secret double life" theory. See, I've been slowly finding out over the last few months just how many lies my psycho possessive ex told me. Even though we've been broken up for over a year, I'm finding these things out now. And it's making me really paranoid. I mean, these are things that would be blatantly obvious to any other human being on the face of the earth, and I still believed him.
So Michael being at work all the damn time and not being able to talk to me makes me worry. What if he's lying? Of course, it got worse after I actually had breakfast with the psycho ex, who tried to suggest that Michael was not, in fact, a rocket scientist at all and that he was clearly lying to me and cheating on me. I tried really hard to act like it hadn't gotten to me. And of course, I never even hinted to him that it had gotten to me; I treated him like he was the psycho insane person that he is.
But it made me worry.
I mean, I worry to the point that sometimes I check the things that Michael tells me. I Google them to make sure they're actually happening.
And of course, when he doesn't call, my first thought isn't that he's at work...it's either that he's dead, in the hospital, with another girl, or living his secret double life.
I feel so insane thinking that. I've been trying really hard to work on it, but it's really difficult. What's funny is that as soon as I start telling our whole dating story to someone, I all of a sudden am like, "I am insane. Clearly, this guy is crazy about me."
posted
The reason you know he's not leading a double life is that (1) he lives in Slidell. There's no one there worth running around with.
Posts: 5462 | Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
You know, you could confront the worst-case scenario. If he were living a double life, would you leave him, or does he treat you well enough now that it wouldn't matter?
Posts: 37449 | Registered: May 1999
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![[Laugh]](graemlins/laugh.gif)
at Noemon![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
![[Frown]](frown.gif)
I'm going to try to set up a little pen for him so that I can take him out of the tank and let him run around.![[Smile]](smile.gif)
![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
I try to ignore that so that I can continue to function as a human being.![[Wink]](wink.gif)
![[Blushing]](graemlins/blushing.gif)
