posted
"Joke thread" is probably the wrong term, however this thread was clearly meant to be light-hearted, not offensive. Yes, he shouldn't have taken the petition entries so seriously, and he probably wouldn't have in other circumstances, however I think he found them offensive because he wanted to find out whether people had gotten over his [now deleted] thread from yesterday (and some clearly haven't).
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Blayne Bradley
unregistered
posted
I deleted that thread because people asked me to, not because I wanted to.
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posted
IIRC, nobody asked you to delete your thread. Instead, they wanted you to stop starting so many threads.
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quote:I deleted that thread because people asked me to
And that was very nice of you. Honestly, were I to get the flack that you get on a regular basis, I would be far less civil. Probably woulda gotten myself banned pretty quick.
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Blayne Bradley
unregistered
posted
Because sent me PMs to delete the thread.
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quote:Originally posted by King of Men: As it happens, I asked him to delete that thread, through non-Hatrack channels.
So the best way to get Blayne to delete threads is to question your pure, Nordic heterosexuality? Sweet. Thanks for the tip!
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I rather suspect that our good janitor would object to anything of the sort.
Did someone break your humor meter, or do I need to make jokes about snow-shoes and lutefisk to get you to join in the fun?
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quote:I have no idea why you would want to preserve this, whatever it is. But thanks anyway.
I would natually assume, and it looks like Blayne did as well, that the purpose of sending him a PM asking for thread deletion is that you didn't want it known in public that you were asking for that.
Because otherwise, I'd assume that you'd just ask him to do it in public.
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quote:Because otherwise, I'd assume that you'd just ask him to do it in public.
I was laughing at his mis-spelling of 'anonymity', which you must admit was fairly atrocious. But anyway, it is polite for Blayne to keep his PMs in confidence, but it is not necessary for the sender to do so. So I corrected your error of fact, that being more important than such a minor confidence.
quote:Did someone break your humor meter, or do I need to make jokes about snow-shoes and lutefisk to get you to join in the fun?
Gee, I don't have much of a sense of humour about questions touching my identity and sense of self. I must be a boring squarehead. What's next, you make jokes about my scientific integrity to get me to lighten up?
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quote:Originally posted by kmbboots: What? Because of the whole "man-crush" thing? Really?
Oh man, now it's really funny.
The overreaction was funny on its own, but now that I know that KoM has absolutely no sense of humor it's even funnier. To the point where he'll ask someone to delete a thread if anyone impugns his sexual orientation.
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quote:Originally posted by King of Men: What's next, you make jokes about my scientific integrity to get me to lighten up?
Sure, why not? It'd be funny because it isn't true. There's nothing about being a scientist that means you can't be funny, or self-deprecating. If anything, it will help more people like you, which isn't a bad thing.
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quote:Originally posted by King of Men: Gee, I don't have much of a sense of humour about questions touching my identity and sense of self.
That's really bizarre, considering how you treat things which touch other's identity and sense of self, such as religion.
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posted
You know, "man crush" is used specifically to say that it is not a sexual crush. If a guy is attracted to another guy in a sexual manner, it is just a crush.
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That being said...KoM, getting a thread deleted just because someone made a joke that could be wrongly interpreted to them saying you were gay...you people are just so emotional.
Do you flip out when people ask if you're "coming out tonight?"
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posted
Other people are free to react as strongly as I did, and often do. Further, people who attach their sense of self to things which are demonstrably untrue get exactly what they deserve.
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posted
The only people I've ever known who actually regarded "I'm not into dudes" as an important part of their self identity were all closeted gay men. Just saying is all.
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quote:Originally posted by Primal Curve: If anything, it will help more people like you, which isn't a bad thing.
I get the impression that this is not high on the list of KoM's priorities.
He should care, if he's ever to keep friends in the scientific community. I don't know about you, but if I were a scientist, I wouldn't want to miss out on the annual barbeque because I'm known as a wet blanket.
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posted
Personal insults are rude, even if they are intended as "jokes". Accusing someone of lacking a sense of humor because they don't laugh when they are insulted, is juvenille.
Those of you who aren't scientists probably don't appreciate that impuning someones scientific integrity is a very serious charge. To a scientists, it is the equivalent of accusing a Mormon Bishop of molesting primary girls. Somethings just aren't funny.
Don't get me wrong, I find KoM's continual rants against religion and mockery of religion to be rude and immature. I just can't see that returning tit for tat is any better.
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posted
Would joking about a scientist's scientific integrity by on par with joking about a writer plagiarising? Not making a point, just asking a scientist. (If you can't answer, I'll send a letter to Beekman.)
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posted
If I might add my two cents here, I think there is a subtle unconscious distinction that some people make when judging whether a joke is hurtful or not.
For these people, jokes about something that people cannot change and were born with can be more hurtful than jokes about something that people chose for themselves and can change. (which is not to say that there is no overlap, but rather that the average level of "possible offence" if I can can call it that differs)
So jokes about race, sexual orientation, genetic disabilities, etc. are perceived as more hurtful than jokes about religion, jobs, political views, etc.
As an example, possibly this is why jokes about lawyers are commonly accepted whereas jokes about Jews (as an ethnic group) are less accepted, even though many of the jokes could be reused by simply copying and pasting "Jew" for "lawyer."
Obviously not everyone makes this distinction, but KoM may very well make this distinction when it comes to sex.
Short version: attack/joke at the idea, not the person
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posted
The funny thing is that the joke wasn't about KoM's sexual orientation at all, except for implying that he's not gay.
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quote:Originally posted by mr_porteiro_head: The funny thing is that the joke wasn't about KoM's sexual orientation at all, except for implying that he's not gay.
I'm not sure how well that translates really. I'm in Canada and I've never heard the term "man-crush" and he's in Norway(?). I actually had to look up the term in the Urban Dictionary online.
To be honest, perhaps I still do not get it. My understanding is that the joke is supposed to be funny because its supposed to be close to saying KoM has a "gay-crush" on Blayne, but not quite because "man-crush" is slightly different. In the same way that a FCUK shirt is supposed to be funny because its different from a shirt that had the letters in the "correct" order?
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posted
"man-crush" is a way of indicating a man's affection for another man while simultaneously making it explicit that the affection is non-sexual.
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quote:Originally posted by mr_porteiro_head: The funny thing is that the joke wasn't about KoM's sexual orientation at all, except for implying that he's not gay.
I'm not sure how well that translates really. I'm in Canada and I've never heard the term "man-crush" and he's in Norway(?). I actually had to look up the term in the Urban Dictionary online.
To be honest, perhaps I still do not get it. My understanding is that the joke is supposed to be funny because its supposed to be close to saying KoM has a "gay-crush" on Blayne, but not quite because "man-crush" is slightly different. In the same way that a FCUK shirt is supposed to be funny because its different from a shirt that had the letters in the "correct" order?
That's how I've always interpreted it, but then again this language moves pretty fast.
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posted
That's not the intrepretion - it very specifically excludes gay crushes.
The only way it could be construed as gay is if one believes there is absolutely no such thing as admiration or fondness that is not sexual. That it is impossible for a man to hold another man in esteem and not be gay.
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posted
It's not just holding a man in esteem. It's a crush. You think they're just awesome and that everything they do is super. You really want to be around them and you want their attention. However, this has no element of sexual attraction.
There was a Seinfeld episode about this.
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quote:Originally posted by Mucus: I'm not sure how well that translates really. I'm in Canada and I've never heard the term "man-crush" and he's in Norway(?). I actually had to look up the term in the Urban Dictionary online.
It's not a term I'm familiar with either even though I live in the US. Without the explaination that it referred specifically to a non-sexual obsession, I certainly would have interpreted it to imply a homosexual attraction. It seems hardly fair to poke fun at some one for misunderstanding a slang term that is not in common use among their peers. In fact it seems presumptuous on a forum like this which cuts across many age, ethnic and cultural groups to expect that people would understand any given slang term.
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quote:Originally posted by The Rabbit: Accusing someone of lacking a sense of humor because they don't laugh when they are insulted, is juvenille.
Implying that I behave in a child-like manner is also insulting, but I'm sure you didn't mean it that way. Oh wait, you did, because you aren't joking. So it must be acceptable to question someone's motives only if you want to reprimand them. That makes sense.
quote:Originally posted by The Rabbit: Those of you who aren't scientists probably don't appreciate that impuning someones scientific integrity is a very serious charge. To a scientists, it is the equivalent of accusing a Mormon Bishop of molesting primary girls. Somethings just aren't funny.
That's insulting to the many people who have been molested by authority figures of any kind, as the analogy is very much innacurate. Child Molestation is a severe moral issue involving issues of innocence, abuse of authority, and abuse of trust. Calling into question someone's scientific integrity is a question of professional ethics. Totally different.
quote:Originally posted by The Rabbit: Don't get me wrong, I find KoM's continual rants against religion and mockery of religion to be rude and immature.
I just can't see that returning tit for tat is any better.
I'm not returning tit for tat. I happen to agree with KoM more often than not. I have a problem with his methodology in that regard, but I don't disagree with his positions, as I consider myself to be an atheist as well.
I was just taken aback by his response. I figured someone who could dish it out was also expected to take it. It's really the rule of the game. If you don't want to be made fun of, you don't make fun of others. You can argue from the outside that no one should ever make fun of anyone else, but that's not the rules that KoM is playing by. If he doesn't want to be made fun of, he shouldn't try and make fun of others, because it's going to be reciprocated no matter how much he complains.
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posted
I'm going to disagree with you there, Kat. While the term man crush explicitly means something that is not sexual in nature, it's quite possible to use the term to imply more. I'm not saying that's what happened, but inferring that does not necessitate it being impossible to hold another man in esteem and not be gay.
----
Those two are good friends. (nudge, nudge, wink, wink)
He's got a man crush on him. (nudge, nudge, wink, wink)
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posted
Rabbit, You are being very insulting here. I don't understand why you consider it okay for you, especially in a situation where it has repeatedly been explained to you there were no intended insults.
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posted
Well, given BB and my interpretation, I could definitely sympathize with how one could take offence.
The joke is due to the close-but-not-quite similarity between two things, one slightly distasteful and one very distasteful (to the individual). i.e. KoM has a man-crush on Blayne, "haha" its funny because its close to being gay, but he can't be upset because I didn't actually say it "wink wink nudge nudge" and meanwhile I get a free pass on saying that he has a crush on Blayne
Trying to extrapolate this another way, its like joking that Mitt Romney is campaigning for President so he can seduce interns into "polyga-romney." "Haha" its funny because he's a Mormon and I didn't exactly say polygamy *wink wink nudge nudge* and meanwhile I get a free pass on saying he's like Clinton
The latter joke is in bad taste, viewed in a similar perspective the first could easily be seen as bad taste too.
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posted
Wait, how is Rabbit being "very insulting"? Or are you being sarcastic to prove the point that the original "man-crush" joke wasn't insulting, so it's could be considered silly to take it that way?
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posted
I think Rabbit's being insulting. In fact, so insulting that I suspect she's being funny with the chastisement for saying something that might be construed as offensive.
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quote:KoM has a man-crush on Blayne, "haha" its funny because its close to being gay, but he can't be upset because I didn't actually say it "wink wink nudge nudge" and meanwhile I get a free pass on saying that he has a crush on Blayne
That's not the nature of the joke at all. There was no implication that KoM was gay or desired Blayne in a sexual manner.
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posted
Mucus, I still think you're applying a bit of your own incorrect interpretation of the term here. You admit to being unfamiliar with the term but then go on to state that the reason it's funny is because it has something to do with heterosexuality.
It's funny in the same way that accusing someone of a "normal" crush is funny. It doesn't suggest that they are of a different sexual orientation than they claim to be. It just makes an exaggerated claim about their esteem for a particular individual.
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