posted
Pearce, have you tried all the grassroots methods of attracting her attention? Put up flyers, post on Craigslist, put up a notice on any prominent local bulletin boards, put up a notice in all Planned Parenthood clinics near you (most of them are very cooperative in this regard).
It doesn't have to be caustic, threatening or anything else that would expedite such a notice being removed, just a picture with a note like "Do you know this man's wife? If so, please contact me at (anonymous e-mail address)." It may not reach her directly, but there's a good chance someone who knows her will find it. Now's the best time, since they just got married and their faces & names are prominent in the minds of those who know them.
Posts: 4313 | Registered: Sep 2004
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posted
We've found wedding registries of theirs, but as yet no marriage certificate. I think they were planning on living in Abita Springs, so anything I do around here would probably be useless. I did email the one coworker of his that I've met, but he hasn't responded. Michael seems to have deleted his entire online presence, and I assume that if she hasn't found out by his Myspace and such before now, she probably doesn't use the Internet much at all.
Her name is SO common, too. It's frustrating! Part of me just wants to give up and let it go, but that's the part that's worried that this is me dwelling on it too much. I guess it's because in this case, revenge and doing the right thing fall neatly into the exact same action: making sure the wife is informed. So I guess that makes me worry if I'm doing this for the right reasons. But she really does need to know. And get tested. Speaking of which, the check he supposedly mailed me to cover testing still hasn't come. Fortunately, I just went ahead and had it done without waiting for said check. So if it does show up, hooray, I won't be quite so tight on money. If it doesn't, at least I'll know.
posted
By the way, his gifts and things have been donated. The people seemed really happy to have all those boxes of stuffed animals and stuff, especially right at the holidays. That cheered me up today.
But I allowed myself to be a little selfish. I did not donate the Wii.
posted
That sounds great, especially the stuffed animals and things.
And I don't blame you about the Wii. Do you play Guitar Hero? That's the one I've been hearing about.
Posts: 1753 | Registered: Aug 2002
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posted
Augh. One of the people who could have been most helpful in finding the wife (a coworker of his) thinks that I only want to find her to get revenge.
Cutting my losses just isn't enough for me right now. I really, honestly don't feel right about having been a part of this situation, and I feel like there must be some way for me to make amends. And I think the best way would be to make sure the woman is informed.
But yeah. It's frustrating when people think you're some kind of spiteful person. I mean....she DOES deserve to know...at least, I think so. And it seems like a lot of you guys think so, as well.
I don't know. This whole situation is exhausting.
Edit: And no! I've never played guitar hero, even though many of my friends are totally addicted to it. I should give it a try sometime.
posted
Ok- possibly mean, dishonest way to make sure the coworker helps you- tell the coworker that one of your tests came back positive and so you just want to make sure she knows to test for it too.
Posts: 1001 | Registered: Mar 2006
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posted
I think it would become vengeful then because telling someone they have a disease and majorly freaking them out is mean. But the problem is, realistically, she could have a disease. And she doesn't know to be tested. And let's say she does have a disease, when they try diagnosing, they may discount STDS because she is supposedly in a committed monogomous relationship. In this day and age, the coworker should realize that and at the very least, pass on this message.
edit to add- I wouldn't actually tell her she had a disease, but I would try to get the coworker to understand why it matters. I personally know women who don't get pap smears because they are married and have no family history. I don't think telling her is vengeance. I think it is looking out for her health.
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The people seemed really happy to have all those boxes of stuffed animals and stuff, especially right at the holidays. That cheered me up today.![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
Do you play Guitar Hero? That's the one I've been hearing about.
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I feel like then it would be vengeful. I dunno why.
