Granted. You get to walk around in reflective shades and black suits, breaking the rules of the matrix at every opportunity. The only drawback: you and the other agents have to fight those pesky humans who come barging in expecting to change the system.
quote: I wish for a lifetime supply of lindt truffles.
Granted. Soon, you need to be rolled everywhere. And enlarging all the doorways in your home was NOT cheap.
quote: I wish reading hatrack counted as exercise.
Granted. In a few days, you waste away to nothing!
I wish I knew who my secret admirer (this is a school thing, each of the teachers has a senior who is writing them little notes) was.
Posts: 32919 | Registered: Mar 2003
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Some funny guy throws unidentifiable unmentionables at you during a pig fetus-disecting session while you are asleep. Consequently, you never fall asleep again. But that means you have to be fully conscious during bio, which is never fun.
I wish some old people just weren't so rude!
Posts: 165 | Registered: Apr 2004
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Granted. Now you can't write a thing, even a post-it, a purchase list or a love letter, without everyone who reads it to wet themselves from laugh. You become so lonely you decide to live in a monastery. I wish I work in a library.
Posts: 3526 | Registered: Oct 2001
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GRANTED! Unfortunately, the only Library left is a volunteer library. And since you quit your job to work in a library, you now make absolutely no money. How will you eat?
I wished it wasn't cold outside right now.
Posts: 529 | Registered: Jul 2004
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Granted. It's now 197 degrees in the shade, no sign of rain in the forecast for the next ... oh... hundred years or so... and you forgot your stillsuit at home.
I wish my children would behave.
Posts: 4515 | Registered: Jul 2004
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Granted, the entire band takes music lessons and now they write really complicated stuff that is unlistenable, instead of the simple and unlistenable stuff they used to write.
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GRANTED! unfortunately it now rains, which may be good, but not for you... I forgot to mention you have a massive hole in your roof right over your bed and t.v. and the rain is like.... cold.
I wish I was a telemarketer.
Posts: 529 | Registered: Jul 2004
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Granted. You now know it is titled "The monkey's Paw" because of a short story with the same title in which a monkey's paw grants wishes but they occur in some horrible and unforseen way. Now that you realise this your life no longer has meaning, and you sink into uncontrolable depression.
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granted, you know have an ice cold coca-cola, unfourtunatly someone has thoroughly shaken it up and when you open it, it sprays everywhere, even on some big muscley guy, and he kills you because you sprayed coca-cola on him.
I wish that I had an idea so great that my head would explode if I even began to know what I was talking about.
Posts: 2489 | Registered: Jan 2002
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You take a long, deep drink of your ice cold coca cola, and are promptly stricken with brain freeze. Ordinarily, this wouldn't be that big of a deal, but in this case you foolishly take the drink just as you're about to merge onto a busy freeway. One of the members of the clean up crew takes a break from scraping your remains from the pavement to drink your now just slightly less than ice cold coke, which was miraculously unspilled in the horrific accident. He doesn't get brain freeze at all.
I wish that Sara would post her comments about chapter 1 in the China Mountain Zhang thread.
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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Dkw, granted! It's run by a person who you know and loath. You are opposed to him ideologically, morally, personally--you name it, the guy is scum. However, his prices are fantastic and his food of high quality. People flock to his store, and he becomes quite wealthy. Any time you're running low on something, you have to wrestle with your conscience before driving to the next town to get groceries.
MEC, granted! But you aren't around to enjoy the witty new responses, because YOU FORGET TO BREATHE!!!
I wish I'd taken tylenol hours ago; the Excedrin did nothing to cut my headache, but tylenol took care of it within about 15 minutes of my having taken it.
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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Granted. But your job changes, and you have to work every weekend. Your normal days off are now Wednesday and Thursday, making Friday the equivilant of Monday prior to your wish.
I wish it would stop raining before I walk out the door in 6 minutes.
Posts: 7954 | Registered: Mar 2004
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You are now the proud owner of a cookie. It is a fine cookie, the perfect size, made with the perfect ingredients, baked the perfect amount of time. As you sit on a park bench, poised to take your first bite, a bird flies overhead, perfectly glazing your cookie with a large, liquid dropping.
I wish Cotton were a monkey! I wish Cotton were a monkey!
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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Granted. Cotton is now a monkey. Granted. Cotton is now a monkey. Wait a minute! Now there's TWO monkeys! One is Good!Cotton, and the other is Evil!Cotton. It's up to you to decide which is which by giving them both sharp toys to play with.
I wish I could stop distracting myself and finish my homework due in three hours...
Posts: 4089 | Registered: Apr 2003
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Granted. Hatrack crashes, and you find yourself with plenty of time to get your homework done. However, OSC decides that keeping the site running just isn't financially feasible anymore, so pulls the plug on the forum once and for all. Good going sarmup, you destroyed Hatrack. Hope you're happy.
I wish sarcasticmuppet would post a witty response to this message.
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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Granted. She puts considerable work into a sparklingly witty response instead of finishing her homework. She's now mad at you and makes Leilanwar kill Artavazdes in his sleep.
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You do! Unfortunately all of her shirts are sleeveless, and while you and Porter feel very uncomfortable with that, you're both too nice of people to tell her. Even more unfortunately, she's a live in maid. As a result, neither of you really feels comfortable in your own house ever again.
I wish I could hang out with Christine this weekend (she's in Chile at the moment, so that isn't a possibility without the aid of the genie).
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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But since you didn't think of it, you don't wish it, and therefore it doesn't happen.
