Author
Topic: The monkey's paw -- a game
skillery
Member
posted September 29, 2004 05:15 PM
quote: I wish that I had a photographic memory. Having downed so many cans of Guarana on your mission, the ingredients list is permanently etched on your retina. quote: I wish I could always see next week's stock prices. Everyone wonders why you jumped out of your office window.
Posts: 2655 | Registered: Feb 2004
| IP: Logged |
Teshi
Member
posted September 29, 2004 05:21 PM
They do. In the place of cars and other powerd vehicles.
Posts: 8473 | Registered: Apr 2003
| IP: Logged |
Fyfe
Member
posted September 29, 2004 05:55 PM
You can. Unfortunately you are completely incapable of deciphering what you write.
Posts: 910 | Registered: May 2000
| IP: Logged |
Turgan
Member
posted September 29, 2004 06:40 PM
Granted. Unfortunately, this human intestine wished to live INSIDE a piece of freshly baked bread. And this piece was the only one left on the planet.. so... enjoy.
Posts: 529 | Registered: Jul 2004
| IP: Logged |
Vadon
Member
posted September 29, 2004 06:46 PM
Wish granted, she says she needs a pencil, only to never speak to you again.
Posts: 1831 | Registered: Jan 2003
| IP: Logged |
Annie
Member
posted September 29, 2004 06:54 PM
Granted. You have a brand new roll of duct tape.... wrapped around every inch of your body. You have to pull it off starting with the hairiest part of your leg.
Posts: 8504 | Registered: Aug 1999
| IP: Logged |
Annie
Member
posted September 29, 2004 06:55 PM
Nobody granted Celia's fat cat wish - so here you go. Your fat cat, after bankrupting you with 3 bags of Iams a day, eats you while you sleep.
Posts: 8504 | Registered: Aug 1999
| IP: Logged |
Turgan
Member
posted September 29, 2004 07:50 PM
Granted. Here you are, the latest in ethiopian footwear!
Posts: 529 | Registered: Jul 2004
| IP: Logged |
Vadon
Member
posted September 29, 2004 08:17 PM
Granted, to insure that it was not your Cellphone that broke, someone else owns it, even though you pay for it.
Posts: 1831 | Registered: Jan 2003
| IP: Logged |
Bob_Scopatz
Member
posted September 29, 2004 08:19 PM
Tenants have moved, to a tent city on your front lawn.
Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000
| IP: Logged |
Annie
Member
posted September 29, 2004 08:21 PM
Granted. Your tenents move out, and you're left with no principles and no purpose to life.
Posts: 8504 | Registered: Aug 1999
| IP: Logged |
Turgan
Member
posted September 29, 2004 08:22 PM
granted. Unfortunately, your phone line jumped to 3000 dollars a month.
Posts: 529 | Registered: Jul 2004
| IP: Logged |
Vadon
Member
posted September 29, 2004 08:29 PM
Granted, however no one will ever take you seriously again.
Posts: 1831 | Registered: Jan 2003
| IP: Logged |
Turgan
Member
posted September 29, 2004 08:42 PM
Granted. Now you just need to learn how to speak again.
Posts: 529 | Registered: Jul 2004
| IP: Logged |
Polio
Member
posted September 29, 2004 08:55 PM
You get it at an auction for charity. It has been signed by Paris Hilton.
Posts: 165 | Registered: Apr 2004
| IP: Logged |
sarcasticmuppet
Member
posted September 29, 2004 08:58 PM
smaller hands in porportion to your 6-inch tall self.
Posts: 4089 | Registered: Apr 2003
| IP: Logged |
pooka
Member
posted September 29, 2004 09:02 PM
ASPCA Alert: The tender hearted should skip this post:.
Posts: 11017 | Registered: Apr 2003
| IP: Logged |
Anthro
Member
posted September 29, 2004 09:10 PM
You are very accomplished. Mostly because your manager whips you after concerts when you hit a wrong note.Ender's Game ..[ September 29, 2004, 09:12 PM: Message edited by: Anthro ]
Posts: 550 | Registered: Jan 2004
| IP: Logged |
Bob_Scopatz
Member
posted September 29, 2004 09:45 PM
Wish granted, but it's a copy with the cover removed and you go to ask OSC to sign it and he beats the living cr@p out of you.
Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000
| IP: Logged |
pooka
Member
posted September 29, 2004 11:12 PM
Granted, you have perfect teeth from a lifetime of eating only macrobiotic sprouts. Wait- you're vegan aren't you?
Posts: 11017 | Registered: Apr 2003
| IP: Logged |
skillery
Member
posted September 29, 2004 11:36 PM
quote: I wish it weren't so seemingly tricky to eat macrobiotic You are admitted to a Buddhist monastery, where a skillful chef helps you to balance your yin and yang.macrobiotic on that last wish.[ September 29, 2004, 11:40 PM: Message edited by: skillery ]
Posts: 2655 | Registered: Feb 2004
| IP: Logged |
Book
Member
posted September 29, 2004 11:45 PM
Okay. Your significant other catches you looking up illegal internet porn instead.
Posts: 2258 | Registered: Aug 2003
| IP: Logged |
Mr.Funny
Member
posted September 30, 2004 12:33 AM
Granted. Your eyeballs fall out, thus saving you the trouble of them burning from contacts.
Posts: 1466 | Registered: Jan 2003
| IP: Logged |
T_Smith
Member
posted September 30, 2004 01:20 AM
Congratulations, you just got kicked out of highschool.
Posts: 9754 | Registered: Jul 2002
| IP: Logged |
Mr.Funny
Member
posted September 30, 2004 01:24 AM
The donut doesn't kill you, but instead sends you into a year-long coma.
Posts: 1466 | Registered: Jan 2003
| IP: Logged |
peterh
Member
posted September 30, 2004 01:32 AM
Welcome to the world population explosion.
Posts: 995 | Registered: May 2003
| IP: Logged |
mr_porteiro_head
Member
posted September 30, 2004 01:39 AM
*granted* Now you can smell everybody on hatrack.
Posts: 16551 | Registered: Feb 2003
| IP: Logged |
Turgan
Member
posted September 30, 2004 08:57 AM
Granted. Your mouth is sewn shut and hands glued behind your back for a full twenty four hours.
Posts: 529 | Registered: Jul 2004
| IP: Logged |
Hobbes
Member
posted September 30, 2004 09:22 AM
Granted, everyone who lives with you has been shot through the head and their bodies burned like so much kindling.
Posts: 10602 | Registered: Oct 1999
| IP: Logged |
Turgan
Member
posted September 30, 2004 09:53 AM
GRANTED! Unfortunately, you didn't specify. Here you are. A million "Gigli" DVD's on sale for forty three cents.[ September 30, 2004, 09:54 AM: Message edited by: Turgan ]
Posts: 529 | Registered: Jul 2004
| IP: Logged |
MEC
Member
posted September 30, 2004 10:04 AM
Granted, but now they just make gay porno's starring themselves.
Posts: 2489 | Registered: Jan 2002
| IP: Logged |
Turgan
Member
posted September 30, 2004 10:13 AM
Granted. Unfortunately, you didn't die... Neither did Carrot Top.
Posts: 529 | Registered: Jul 2004
| IP: Logged |
Shan
Member
posted September 30, 2004 10:15 AM
Granted - however, due to time-space continuum oddities, every point of destruction leads you back to the exact same wish over and over again.[ September 30, 2004, 10:16 AM: Message edited by: Shan ]
Posts: 5609 | Registered: Jan 2003
| IP: Logged |
Turgan
Member
posted September 30, 2004 10:16 AM
ha ha ha.. i beat you.[ September 30, 2004, 10:17 AM: Message edited by: Turgan ]
Posts: 529 | Registered: Jul 2004
| IP: Logged |
Shan
Member
posted September 30, 2004 10:17 AM
Granted, Turgan . . . Naomi IS with you and her NEW fiance . . . (mwha-ha-ha)[ September 30, 2004, 10:18 AM: Message edited by: Shan ]
Posts: 5609 | Registered: Jan 2003
| IP: Logged |
Turgan
Member
posted September 30, 2004 10:20 AM
granted. unfortunately, this also means you type slower... and still slower than me.
Posts: 529 | Registered: Jul 2004
| IP: Logged |
Shan
Member
posted September 30, 2004 10:27 AM
GFranted: it looks very nice dripping down your face with the bowl upside down on your head.
Posts: 5609 | Registered: Jan 2003
| IP: Logged |
Turgan
Member
posted September 30, 2004 11:35 AM
Granted. But, just yesterday, the greatest commandment was changed to "Thou shalt eat cheese sticks whenever possible"
Posts: 529 | Registered: Jul 2004
| IP: Logged |
Eruve Nandiriel
Member
posted September 30, 2004 11:42 AM
You pass your test...and didn't put your name on the paper, so you don't get the grade.
Posts: 4174 | Registered: Sep 2003
| IP: Logged |
Turgan
Member
posted September 30, 2004 11:45 AM
GRANTED! Unfortunately, you concentrate so hard your brain explodes.
Posts: 529 | Registered: Jul 2004
| IP: Logged |
Scott R
Member
posted September 30, 2004 11:46 AM
Granted. She smiles at you because she has found her next ritual sacrifice.[ September 30, 2004, 11:46 AM: Message edited by: Scott R ]
Posts: 14554 | Registered: Dec 1999
| IP: Logged |
Annie
Member
posted September 30, 2004 11:46 AM
nevermind...[ September 30, 2004, 11:46 AM: Message edited by: Annie ]
Posts: 8504 | Registered: Aug 1999
| IP: Logged |
Annie
Member
posted September 30, 2004 11:47 AM
Granted - you have a copy of the Princess Bride, but your dvd player now only plays zone 3.
Posts: 8504 | Registered: Aug 1999
| IP: Logged |
Dan_raven
Member
posted September 30, 2004 11:48 AM
Granted, now you know how to fish, and 500 kindergarten kids come over and play "Go Fish" with you all day long, every day, for the rest of your mercifully short life.
Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002
| IP: Logged |
Goody Scrivener
Member
posted September 30, 2004 11:52 AM
quote: I wish I had one moment of perfect bliss. Granted, but you were so worried about finding that one moment that you missed it when it came.
Posts: 4515 | Registered: Jul 2004
| IP: Logged |
docmagik
Member
posted September 30, 2004 11:57 AM
Granted, but now Kate Spade Rachel's family is looking for her.
Posts: 1894 | Registered: Aug 2000
| IP: Logged |
Eruve Nandiriel
Member
posted September 30, 2004 12:00 PM
Granted. Unfortunately, hardly anyone is on during the day.
Posts: 4174 | Registered: Sep 2003
| IP: Logged |
docmagik
Member
posted September 30, 2004 12:03 PM
Granted. Unfortunately, you miss all those other words you used to be able to type.
Posts: 1894 | Registered: Aug 2000
| IP: Logged |
Scott R
Member
posted September 30, 2004 12:05 PM
Granted. You become a hack.
Posts: 14554 | Registered: Dec 1999
| IP: Logged |
pooka
Member
posted September 30, 2004 12:06 PM
edit: same diff.[ September 30, 2004, 12:10 PM: Message edited by: pooka ]
Posts: 11017 | Registered: Apr 2003
| IP: Logged |
Printer-friendly view of this topic
![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
![[Grumble]](graemlins/grumble.gif)
