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» Hatrack River Forum » Active Forums » Books, Films, Food and Culture » Begging the Question (a game) (Page 210)

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Author Topic: Begging the Question (a game)
suminonA
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You really told your children that Santa's reindeers can fly because they ate the grass on Superman's lawn?

Kids would believe anything.

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Eduardo St. Elmo
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Would you call me naive for growing up with the belief that we could all live in peace together?

Some humble bums.

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anti_maven
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What maketh that mumble rumble?

An industrial sized marraca.

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Tante Shvester
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What do you call that used car you got off the internet?

Quantum Mechanics.

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anti_maven
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Fie! My quantum has broken down. Who can I call?

The large print giveth, and the small print taketh away.

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suminonA
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What's with all the footnotes in your scriptures?

Iím not excessively proud of it.

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Sterling
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Why is this beautiful golden raspberry gathering dust on your mantle?

Like a double handful of thumbtacks on a twenty-story staircase.

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Enigmatic
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Fine! If you think "Like rain on your wedding day" isn't actually irony, what would you suggest instead, smartypants?

Drunk penguins.

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anti_maven
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Wow are those Nuns that are reeling about oer there?

I put it back and ran off.

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suminonA
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So, you being the greatest surgeon in the world and all, what did you do that time when operating on that patient and you dropped his brain on the floor?

Mine is attached with rusty nails.

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Sterling
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Good Lord, what keeps the bottom from falling out of this rusty old boat of yours we're on?

I see a solution; you're not gonna like it.

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suminonA
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So, how can you test your new torture-o-tron if Iím the only one who is allowed to know about it?

Touching it is out of the question.

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Sterling
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So, it turns out that infestation wasn't termites after all, but The Blob... Any notion how to get rid of The Blob?

That's how the yogurt ended up on the ceiling.

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suminonA
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So, does your Lego catapult work?

It should fall any moment now.

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Eduardo St. Elmo
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Why do you have a curtain attached to your ceiling?

It was a joint venture.

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anti_maven
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Has anyone seen my dairy-product launching mangonel?

It looks real under artificial light.

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suminonA
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What do you mean when you say that your imaginary friend is semi-real?

That was really green.

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Uprooted
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What do you think of the breakfast I just made you, Sam I am?

Denial is much more fun.

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suminonA
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Why won't you call me Daniel?

Exactly 23.

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Sterling
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Psst! Suzy! What do you get if you divide two by three?

Quiet! I heard one move!

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anti_maven
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Are you sure these zombies are just waxworks?

I put the lime in the coconut an' drank it all up.

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Sterling
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Can you think of anything you might have consumed that would cause such a strong laxative effect?

This isn't going to get better if you scratch it.

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Tante Shvester
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What can I do to improve my billiards skilz?

A little castor oil will do the trick.

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suminonA
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How do you expect me to swallow that unreasonable explanation you just gave me, about beavers using oil for their dams?

That's only because it's shiny.

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Dead_Horse
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If they aren't aliens or government agents, then why did those crows attack me and steal my tinfoil hat?


But you said I needed new software for my computer.

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Sterling
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Why are you sitting in front of your terminal in a suit of day-glow foam rubber?

But it's certainly crunchy.

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Tante Shvester
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How can you ever manage to sleep on a bed of lettuce?

It has three corners.

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Luv2ReadProductions
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Did you just say the triangle has three quarters?


First squeeze here, then it will come out on that end.

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Morbo
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Is this a fluff thread or a thread for fluffers?

That turns out not to be the case.

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Tante Shvester
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CAN YOU HEAR ME BETTER WHEN I TYPE IN ALL UPPERCASE?

Head of cabbage, hearts of palm, and kidney beans.

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Sterling
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So, what's the Scarecrow's new girlfriend like?

That's what it takes to be elected to the position.

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suminonA
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Why would you suggest that I should paint my entire body with permanent green paint?

It's not worth it.

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anti_maven
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World peace, on a two-for-one at Woolworths!

Knit one, pearl three.

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kanelock
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what's the score of the knit pearl game?


koolade man told me to.

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Tante Shvester
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Why do you get everything you see advertised on TV?

I've been alive forever and I wrote the very first song.

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suminonA
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So, how do you know so much about the silmarils?

All you need is a seed.

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Tante Shvester
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What do I need to do to start an onanism thread?

Earmuffs.

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Luv2ReadProductions
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How can anyone sit through an entire Rod Stewart concert?

Bar soap and charcoal.

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Tante Shvester
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Why do these black and white cookies taste so nasty?

Two geishas and one kimono.

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Sterling
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What would I need to offer you to make up for those awful cookies?

But he's been doing it for decades, now!

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suminonA
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Aren't you over-reacting a bit, for one lousy TV your uncle just defenestrated?

After all, the window was open.

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Eduardo St. Elmo
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I am at a loss to explain why Opportunity didn't knock once, as it is wont to do, could you perhaps enlighten me?

Before this I was more stable by far.

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Sterling
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Hey, Fred, didn't you have room for eight horses before your owners rennovated you?

Safe to say that's what the problem is.

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happysmiley
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THERE'S A BOMB IN THE DRAIN!
how did that get there?

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Dead_Horse
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Is that an exclamation point at the end of your question?


It might help if you would re-read the instructions.

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Tante Shvester
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Do you know the way to San Jose?

tick-tick-tick

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Dead_Horse
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Are these ticks, or watermelon seeds?


I'll bet I can spit them farther than you can.

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scifibum
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Is there anything ELSE you can say about ping pong balls that is designed to make you look superior?

The Liliputians are upset, but they'll get over it.

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Sterling
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How did Gulliver's performance of 'Short People' go over?

My kung-fu is strong.

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talsmitde
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Why do you feel that you're qualified to be Vice President of marketing?

The trombone met an untimely demise.

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