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Topic: Begging the Question (a game)

jehovoid
Member
Member # 2014

posted

What's your impression of some of these newbies around Hatrack?

(If there was another option, I would have taken it.)

Golf.

Posts: 3056 | Registered: Jun 2001 | IP: Logged |

Paul
Member
Member # 3904

posted

Is there anything more boring than watching molassas drip?

It's one of those hyphen things.

Posts: 1360 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

The Reader
Member
Member # 3636

posted

African-American? How can you subtract two words from each other?

Tiger goes for the birdie putt... Oh! He's tackled by Tony Siragusa. That will definately hurt his chances of keeping the lead. What a play!

Posts: 684 | Registered: Jun 2002 | IP: Logged |

jehovoid
Member
Member # 2014

posted

Why did they change the name of the sport to Golfball?

Ninjas, dude.

Posts: 3056 | Registered: Jun 2001 | IP: Logged |

ae
Member
Member # 3291

posted

Who flipped out and killed everyone?

Oh, he just steals in your mind and leads you into good shituations.

Posts: 2443 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

Paul
Member
Member # 3904

posted

Wait, what is that guy doing with that scalpel?

Cranberries? I SAID BOSENBERRIES!

Posts: 1360 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Bob_Scopatz
Member
Member # 1227

posted

Have you seen Halley's Berrys?

(okay, I know it has nothing to do with Paul's post, but I thought it was funny...)

An ergonomic pillow.

Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000 | IP: Logged |

Paul
Member
Member # 3904

posted

Is that a huge breast implant?

Snakes! LOTS OF SNAKES!

Posts: 1360 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

claytonia the absurd
Member
Member # 3865

posted

Hey Mr. Snake Charmer, is that a python in your pants, or are you just really happy to see me?

Only in the late evening...or the mid-late evening...or the early-mid-late evening...but never at dusk.

Posts: 140 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

jehovoid
Member
Member # 2014

posted

Hey, claytonia, when do you like to watch Steve Martin stand-up?

You have excellent references.

Posts: 3056 | Registered: Jun 2001 | IP: Logged |

Paul
Member
Member # 3904

posted

What do you think about onanism?

Augh! No more!

Posts: 1360 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

LadyDove
Member
Member # 3000

posted

How many more "Halloween" sequels will you be watching?

The third time's the charm.

Posts: 2425 | Registered: Jan 2002 | IP: Logged |

Chess
Member
Member # 3125

posted

What did she tell you after the second condom ripped?

Look at the way it swings.

Posts: 886 | Registered: Mar 2002 | IP: Logged |

Paul
Member
Member # 3904

posted

How can you tell if a monkey is gay?

Smear the jam on the cat and let's get to perpetual motion!

Posts: 1360 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Chess
Member
Member # 3125

posted

What do you have to say about what you learned in phsyics today?

Greasy pits of cat hair in my soup.

Posts: 886 | Registered: Mar 2002 | IP: Logged |

Nylph
Member
Member # 2690

posted

Hi, you are playing Sentence Fragment-HO! Chess, you're up next - what is your fragment? Oh, and this better be good, or I'm going to kill you.

Please take your hand out of my pants.

[This message has been edited by Nylph (edited August 05, 2002).]

Posts: 61 | Registered: Nov 2001 | IP: Logged |

Chess
Member
Member # 3125

posted

How about we go get some ice cream, "friend"?

Yes sir, we have your new best "friend" right here, will that be cash or check?

Posts: 886 | Registered: Mar 2002 | IP: Logged |

Frisco
Member
Member # 3765

posted

Has my new mail-order bride arrived yet? I'm getting rather horny.

Yes, but that doesn't mean that I'm gay.

Posts: 5264 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Dan_raven
Member
Member # 3383

posted

Have you ever danced with the devil in the gray moonlight?

I'm batman darn it.

Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

Paul
Member
Member # 3904

posted

Sir, will you please come down? We can't have people hanging from the rooftops with no pants on.

No! Bad Cardinal, no reacharound!

Posts: 1360 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Dan_raven
Member
Member # 3383

posted

"Well Ozzie Smith, what do you want to do now that you've made it into Baseball's Hall Of Fame?" asked the cute TV personality. Her next words were....

Baseball, Hot Dogs, and Apple Pie

Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

T_Smith
Member
Member # 3734

posted

What classifies America as America?

It comes tomorrow.

Posts: 9754 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Lisa Kane
Member
Member # 3928

posted

When will the end of the world come?

Three elephants, a mongoose and a large sock with a brick in it

[This message has been edited by Lisa Kane (edited August 05, 2002).]

Posts: 9 | Registered: Aug 2002 | IP: Logged |

T_Smith
Member
Member # 3734

posted

Whoa whoa whoa, how did you manage to cross breed an elephant and a mongoose.

Obi-wan is a dude, not some space chick.

Posts: 9754 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Maethoriell
Member
Member # 3805

posted

Is that a girl underneath all of that hair??

This is odd.

Posts: 4628 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Paul
Member
Member # 3904

posted

What are you doing? Why aren't you getting that ferret, hypodermic needle, flaming homer, dog hair, sneeze-guard and marmalade I asked for?

Snorkel for Jesus, maaaan.

Posts: 1360 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

jeniwren
Member
Member # 2002

posted

What did Jettboy say when he heard the recent news of a new church whose services are held entirely underwater?

Chicken sausages and a bicycle built for two.

Posts: 5948 | Registered: Jun 2001 | IP: Logged |

Bob_Scopatz
Member
Member # 1227

posted

What was scared out of their skin, and how did they escape?

A business card and a medium-sized soda.

Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000 | IP: Logged |

LadyDove
Member
Member # 3000

posted

So are their any prerequisits for this job?

Take fifty-two. Action!

Posts: 2425 | Registered: Jan 2002 | IP: Logged |

Maethoriell
Member
Member # 3805

posted

May we have our break now?? It's been 51 times!!

Blah blah blah blah = interesting conversation

Posts: 4628 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Frisco
Member
Member # 3765

posted

Well, I've finished translating these ancient scrolls...except for this chapter with the three busty Egyptian women and the Pyramid boy. It translates, roughly, to "blah blah blah blah". I wonder what these women do to Pyramid boy?

IT PUTS THE LOTION IN THE BASKET!

Posts: 5264 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

jehovoid
Member
Member # 2014

posted

So, I hear the Church is taking up donations in honor of the feast day of Dermititus, patron saint of the dry-skinned, eh Father?

Submit Now.

[This message has been edited by jehovoid (edited August 06, 2002).]

Posts: 3056 | Registered: Jun 2001 | IP: Logged |

Paul
Member
Member # 3904

posted

I've got you all dressed in leather, tied to a ferret and hung upside down, what are you going to say when Bubba comes in here and says, "What do you want to do now?"

I'm wicked and I'm lazy. Oooooh, don't you want to save me?

Posts: 1360 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Nylph
Member
Member # 2690

posted

Talk about stewing in your own juices.

NO! It's not what you think. Really.

[This message has been edited by Nylph (edited August 06, 2002).]

Posts: 61 | Registered: Nov 2001 | IP: Logged |

ludosti
Member
Member # 1772

posted

Why do you have all these Yanni CDs and posters, and what's this?! Yanni videos?!

Only if you paid me.

[This message has been edited by ludosti (edited August 06, 2002).]

Posts: 5879 | Registered: Apr 2001 | IP: Logged |

HonoreDB
Member
Member # 1214

posted

Do you think $1,000,000 would get you and any person of your choice in bed?

Sorry, I didn't see that.

Posts: 535 | Registered: Sep 2000 | IP: Logged |

Paul
Member
Member # 3904

posted

Is that a boa constrictor in your pants?

Fling the SUV across the world!

Posts: 1360 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Dan_raven
Member
Member # 3383

posted

We can kill the plague of Slimey Ugly Germs that have infested the world, but how do we get the vaccine (Slimey Ugly Vaccine--SUV) to everyone fast enough?

This calls for Slimey the Disgusting.

Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

HonoreDB
Member
Member # 1214

posted

But how can we fling the SUV across the world?

If it weren't for the imbalance, he'd be a happy, well-adjusted member of society.

Posts: 535 | Registered: Sep 2000 | IP: Logged |

Paul
Member
Member # 3904

posted

What does the defense have to say in response to the allegations that the defendant slaughtered 32 children, 4 women, an old man, and 14 kittens?

Plastics! It's the wave of the future!

Posts: 1360 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Dan_raven
Member
Member # 3383

posted

Why would you make an artificial hand that goes back and forth?

Wave all five fingers please.

[This message has been edited by Dan_raven (edited August 06, 2002).]

Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged |

ludosti
Member
Member # 1772

posted

So, you think we should start seeing other people?

Let me check my calendar.

Posts: 5879 | Registered: Apr 2001 | IP: Logged |

Paul
Member
Member # 3904

posted

*hissing voice in phone* I'll be there... wherever you will be on Thursday at noon... Do you know who I am?

Augh! You hath stabbed mine libido!

Posts: 1360 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

jehovoid
Member
Member # 2014

posted

Methinks "libido" is a stupid name for a cat! It must die!

What in the hell for?

Posts: 3056 | Registered: Jun 2001 | IP: Logged |

LadyDove
Member
Member # 3000

posted

Congratulations! You've just won $30,000,000 dollars.

Bee-Bop, Dew Drop, and Dork Boy.

Posts: 2425 | Registered: Jan 2002 | IP: Logged |

Chess
Member
Member # 3125

posted

Your mom named your brothers WHAT?

Thinks the 70's freeloving society is coming back to life.

Posts: 886 | Registered: Mar 2002 | IP: Logged |

T_Smith
Member
Member # 3734

posted

What do you think about sex in the new millinium?

The romano family will own you for asking that.

Posts: 9754 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

Chess
Member
Member # 3125

posted

When are you going to sell to the King family, Romano?

The Romano family curse, bad pizza...

Posts: 886 | Registered: Mar 2002 | IP: Logged |

LadyDove
Member
Member # 3000

posted

What are the new-age mafia bosses using to kill their enemies?

The Valentine's Day Massacre was really just a big, "Oops".

Posts: 2425 | Registered: Jan 2002 | IP: Logged |

Paul
Member
Member # 3904

posted

Where were you going with all those guns and whiskey last 2/14?

Scratch my face, big man!

Posts: 1360 | Registered: Jul 2002 | IP: Logged |

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