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» Hatrack River Forum » Active Forums » Books, Films, Food and Culture » Begging the Question (a game) (Page 191)

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Author Topic: Begging the Question (a game)
suminonA
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Man, I've been trying to peal this impossible orange for several hours now... Can you help me, please?

Orange is the colour of truth.

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Eduardo St. Elmo
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Could someone please explain to me what may be the reason behind all these people screaming and chanting, whilst dressed in outfits of such a distinctive colour?

The deepest blues are black.

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MandyM
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So what do you think of Jim Belushi and Dan Aykroyd's musical talent in The Blues Brothers?

I wish you wouldn't!

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Dead_Horse
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Since you have let me out of the bottle, may I grant you 3 wishes?


Here are two more, if you'd like them.

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suminonA
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Do you remember that unique - therefore priceless - work of art that you've convinced me into buying a while ago?

That was quick.

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Itsmechrisa
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This is so fun playing in this... what did you call it? "Sick" Sand?
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Itsmechrisa
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*forgot to put statement above...*

Well, it looked better from the front.

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DaisyMae
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Woah, you actually bought that thong bikini?

It's the bees knees.

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Itsmechrisa
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Hi A!
Wassup C!
So, A, why does your friend there next to you have all those lumps?

Well, I'd sure hope not!

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SoaPiNuReYe
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Do you know if our English Teacher is married???

Yeah I bought those last week.

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happymann
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Are those crutches new?

I only had ten.

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Dead_Horse
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What's the best thing about breaking all your toes?


You know, like those frogs with the sticky fingers.

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happymann
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Can you explain how he caught that?

Kill the Joneses.

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Eduardo St. Elmo
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A thousand humble pardons my dark overlord, but my henchmen forgot the first name of our next intended victim. Was it something along the lines of Indiana, or January.... or perhaps Quincy?

The pen is mightier than the sword.

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suminonA
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What was that chatch-phrase that all writers deluded themselves with?

We're out of the woods now.

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Dead_Horse
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Just how many of your golf clubs did you throw in that lake?


It has too many leaves.

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Eduardo St. Elmo
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Now, for the last time, young mister Kilkenny. This question will decide whether you'll be able to call yourself a real, official Irishman. What's wrong with this four leaf clover?

Never rob a bank on your wedding day.

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Hank
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What's wrong with a little honeymoon fun?

Sweet Baby Gherkins!

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suminonA
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Hi, I'm Gherkins and this is my newly born daughter. Why are you drooling like that?

No, only this one.

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Sterling
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Would you be willing to answer a series of questions?

Time wounds all heels.

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Tante Shvester
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Why is plantar fasciitis so common among the elderly?

Then don't make 'em like they used to -- and I'm SO glad!

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suminonA
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We all do mistakes, I don't blame you. I know you're sorry, but can't you find the sentence in my last book where "They" is misspelled as "Then"?

The other one was better.

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Eduardo St. Elmo
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What was going through your mind whilst you were chewing off your left leg to escape from that bear trap?

And you're walking. And you're walking along...

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suminonA
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What other arguments do you have about you actually healing my inability to stand on my own to feet, and that I will even believe and follow you, other than your deity’s word?

This seems a bit too complicated.

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Tante Shvester
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What is your problem? You're having trouble with "Lather. Rinse. Repeat."?

It was right there, next to the Consumer Reports Buying Guide of 1972.

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happymann
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Where did my copy of The Communist Manifesto go?

About three or four times.

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suminonA
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Man, you stink! Have you bathed in the last five years?

It was an electronic device of some kind.

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Eduardo St. Elmo
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Was it a bird? Was it a plane? Was it an alien wearing red and blue spandex?

Yeah, that's what I would do if I was God.

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suminonA
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Would you create a rock so heavy that not even you could lift?

Seeing is believing.

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Eduardo St. Elmo
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Why do you think it's impossible for a blind person to believe in God?

You just can't teach an old God new tricks.

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suminonA
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Why did the Christian God need to send His son on Earth?

That's a great trick indeed.

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Eduardo St. Elmo
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What would be your response if I told you I scored a hattrick [Big Grin] against the Italian soccer team?

Dreams are bad when all they do is leave the truth behind.

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suminonA
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Did I tell you about my dream about all the Universe disappearing but me?

Quite convincing, surprisingly.

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Eduardo St. Elmo
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As a neurotic liar, how do you think I come across?

Peace is inevitable.

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suminonA
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What would The Borg say if they ware all-loving and stuff?

It's better than Mountain Trek.

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Dead_Horse
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Why did you name your new nature path Molehill Trek?


Well, it would be if there were any moles on it.

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Eduardo St. Elmo
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Has anybody ever told you that your face is frighteningly similar to that of Robert de Niro?

There must be something wrong with Al Pacino's nose.

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Morbo
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Why does the Don keep going "Hoo-waachoo!"?

Nothing could possibly go wrong.

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Tante Shvester
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You wear a belt AND suspenders, with a zipper fly AND button fly?

Just write to your representative in Congress.

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suminonA
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I'd like to do something to make me feel important, but that doesn't have any effect whatsoever. What do you suggest?

At least I'll have one reader.

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Tante Shvester
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What do you think of this as a title for my memoirs: "Letters to Myself"?

Just gently squeeze.

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suminonA
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How exactly are you using canaries for tea?!?

It's a flying green lemon.

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Dan_raven
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What do you call a Aqua colored Yugo falling off a cliff?

An improvement to a Yugo.

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suminonA
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What's a Zastava to you?

That's not at all obvious.

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Dan_raven
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Isn't it obvious, I should be "King of the World"

I'd settle for Prince of Quebec

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Dead_Horse
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What should we call you now that you have married Celine Dion?


Just don't bring them home with you.

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suminonA
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Dad, you're an open minded man, do you have anything against my dating extra-terrestrials?

ET phoned home.

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Eduardo St. Elmo
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Why is the amount on this month's telephone bill so astronomically high?

BA phoned home.

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suminonA
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What could BA possibly have done with that phone?

But Sir, it was blue.

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Sterling
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I told you to fire when you saw the whites of their eyes! You were toe to toe with that alien! Why didn't you shoot?

This brings new meaning to "fatal error."

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